Monday, December 31, 2012

Ankle

If anyone like the bunnies ask, I was online this morning. I was online, and certainly wasn't loitering in the floor, possibly causing the human to stumble, turn her ankle, and nearly end up falling on top of a batch of rabbits. Now the human is sitting propped in bed, ice on ankle, and the bunnies are looking suspiciously at the floor, and anyone who might have been on the floor at the time of this ankle injury. Well, if they want to look at me, I was happily online at the time, and had nothing to do with it! And at least the human's injury kept the polar bears and bunnies home today, and safely away from any shopping trips to buy annoying things for me.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Shopping Tomorrow

The bunnies are going to hop out tomorrow, in search of various items to feed me. I wonder if I should be looking for a hiding place tonight? The problem is, with my tummy fur missing, and the heater acting up, the places that I can use as shelter are limited. Right now I'm limited to my cage, since it has a blanket, and my box house, that is also blanketed. Both will make it very easy for the bunnies to find me when they want to start stuffing me with horrible foods.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

SNOW

It's snowing! Oh, horrors, it is snowing! I will see the weatherman persecuted for this! The snow is flying fast and furious, and I am very concerned. The polar bears arranged to have my tummy fur stolen when it was just a bit nippy. I will be lucky to dodge being completely shaved with snow flying. Does anyone have any suggestions for how to protect myself from fur theft?

Friday, December 28, 2012

Mushrooms

Does anyone know the potential evil of the mushroom? The bunnies have gathered two votes from medical professionals in favor of stuffing me with them. Okay, it's better than one of the bunnies' other plans to stuff me with carrot juice, but I'm still not sure mushrooms are a good idea. What are mushrooms anyway? They look suspiciously vegetable like to me, but I didn't find them listed on a vegetable warning page.

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Tummy Fur Theft

I'm back, and I absolutely must find a lawyer to sue that vet for stealing my fur right away. I know he took it, and sold it to the polar bears to be stuffed into a quilt. My polar bear sisters are always talking about how warm looking my fur is. They probably called while the humans' backs were turned, and offered the vet cash for a large hunk of tummy fur. That's my best fur and I was robbed of it. I know I saw someone at the vet's office with a soda from that company who supplies the bears with cash. If that isn't proof they're in league with the polar bears, I don't know what is!

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Still the Bunnies

It's still the bunnies. Our brother is feeling much grumpier today and is digging through the phone book now looking for an attorney to sue the vet for robbing him of a sizable hunk of tummy fur. While he's doing that we thought we would post and update you. We've done some looking and chatting with others, and we have many wonderful ideas for possible cures for him. The human is feeling much better after we lounged on the bed last night telling her all of our ideas. We think tomorrow we'll hop out to start gathering cure materials. And isn't it just such a coincidence that all of the materials we need are located near the food co-op, which our brother calls that den of seed encouragement?

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Our Brother's Problem

It's the bunnies. Our brother attacked the tree last night. He claims he was trying to save us all from Betsy Bear, but we aren't so sure of that. He got an upset tummy and got lagged to the vet today as a result. Unfortunately, the vet has now diagnosed him with a tumor. Our human has been in hysterics, and fur everywhere is being threatened by tears. Anyway, Sir Pinky is currently high for the moment on medication, so we are posting. And we are also looking for cures for him. Did you know that carrot juice is considered good for his problem? Isn't he just so lucky that he happens to live in a house full of rabbits!

Our Brother's Problem

It's the bunnies. Our brother attacked the tree last night. He claims he was trying to save us all from Betsy Bear, but we aren't so sure of that. He got an upset tummy and got lagged to the vet today as a result. Unfortunately, the vet has now diagnosed him with a tumor. Our human has been in hysterics, and fur everywhere is being threatened by tears. Anyway, Sir Pinky is currently high for the moment on medication, so we are posting. And we are also looking for cures for him. Did you know that carrot juice is considered good for his problem? Isn't he just so lucky that he happens to live in a house full of rabbits!

Monday, December 24, 2012

Lock your Chimneys!

Lock your chimneys! Lock them right away! Hurry before it is too late! Every household is in danger tonight! The new reindeer, who arrived last week, was giving some flying demonstrations to my other reindeer siblings, and the next thing you know, Betsy had a horrible idea in her head. She captured all of the reindeer, all five of them, and has them hitched up to a sleigh! She's going to take to the air at any moment to go on a crime spree to end all crime sprees! She has a rope to slide down the chimneys, and sacks to hold every cookie, pie cake and present she can get her paws on! We're doomed! Doomed, I tell you, doomed! Lock your chimneys now while you still have time!

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Church Report

The humans actually let the squirrel ride in the front seat on the way to church this morning. Now everyone knows that there is a giant squirrel living here. How embarrassing! I was hoping to limit the number of people who knew about the squirrel, and now the humans might as well have taken out a billboard. And worse, the church did drop off those sacks, and now the squirrel is happily munching on some nut filled candy bars. They fed him too! If they're going to feed the squirrel, where is my sack of treats?

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Disaster Looms

Disaster looms tomorrow. Not only is that squirrel lurking, plotting to drag me to church, but now he came in to give me the happy news that for Christmas, the church is distributing large sacks of nuts to squirrels! He's expecting a sack tomorrow! Nothing good can result from that squirrel being gifted with nuts. It's sure to make him grow more, which will lead to a sure disaster! What is the church thinking, catering to squirrels this way? Really, are those bushy tailed troublemakers such wonderful parishioners?

Friday, December 21, 2012

Sunday

The squirrel came trotting in just a bit ago, to tell me I should start scrubbing my fur now, in anticipation of going to CHURCH on Sunday! I'm going to be drug off, and forced to listen first to a bunch of humans attempting to sing, and then to a sermon. And I'll probably end up with a new batch of siblings too, since apparently churches have decided to solve the homeless creature problem by having them move in here. Sniff, sniff, sniff! And now the squirrel is listening to church music and insisting I listen to the squirrel church anthem as well! Isn't there a law against such torture?

Thursday, December 20, 2012

More Bad Luck

Nick the Cat's relations are around here somewhere. I haven't seen their evil black tails poking up yet, but I know they are in the area, and they should be arrested at once. I am sure they are to blame for the coming disaster. There are wind advisories out for the area, and do you know where the wind is blowing from? It is blowing from the home of the BEARS! It is a plot, I am sure of it. The bears are probably getting ready to launch little balloons now, to blow them right to my dwelling, where they will be enthusiastically welcomed! Who knows how many siblings this wind could give me? A floatilla of bears might be in the air at this moment, on their way here. Nick the Cat will pay!

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Today's Bad Luck

I must check the bushes, for I am sure that one of Nick the Cat's relations is lurking nearby, due to the sudden upswing in bad luck. Really, it's too horrible to be believed. First, Cousin Don H. had the absolute, unmitigated nerve to die, and worse, to leave a nice fat obituary in the paper, just ready for the human to find and stick on that awful tree. And, even worse, when she was poking around, looking for more relation names for what I thought was the relatively safe task of package labeling, the human believes she might have stumbled onto yet another relation twist. I know I saw branches on that tree twitching. Not a good sign. It will surely start to grow next, and what if nuts start to drop from it?

Tail Adjustment

I'm back and you won't believe the trouble I am facing now. One of the bunnies and two of the reindeer herd rode to the human's chiropractor appointment this afternoon, and now they have got an awful notion in their fluffy heads. They think my tail is out of alignment, and that I should see a chiropractor right away to get it adjusted! My tail is perfectly aligned, I will have them know, and don't think I am not suspicious. All of them have short, fluffy little tails. I think they are plotting to have my long, slender tail adjusted into their tail style!

Monday, December 17, 2012

Josie Rabbit on Our Brother's Vet Visit

Hehehehehehe! Our brother was gloating over his vet visit, and the trouble he was planning to cause. Well, the joke is on him! The vet just put him on MEDICATION! He has to take two pills a day. Not only are we sure that they will be yucky and disgusting, but now because of this, he is doomed to have to travel everywhere we go. No more dodging trips to the country, and when it comes to visiting the birthplace of the bears, we're going to go ahead and book his seat! We're going to have so much fun with this! We must send the vet a thank you note right away!

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Vet Appointment

I am booked for a vet appointment tomorrow. Normally I am annoyed by these things, but now I am kind of looking forward to it, after the success I had last visit. I wonder who I will be able to drive into fleeing the area this time? I'm thinking I will go for the blonde receptionist, who called me grumpy one visit. Tomorrow is going to be a lot of fun!

Saturday, December 15, 2012

More Bus Issues

The bus company continues to trouble me. Now the bunnies are studying the routes, trying to find the cheapest way to get to the birthplace of the bears, even if it means being on a bus for twenty-four hours straight. They say that will be fine. They'll have their carrots, and they will be perfectly content. Well, what about me? I refuse to share a public box with rabbits! They can't expect me to cross my paws for that long, and I know they will expect me to go on this trip with them!

Friday, December 14, 2012

Success!

The bunnies said it couldn't be done, but I am happy to announce that I have achieved the greatest feline success imaginable! I am happy to announce that the huffing and puffing stunt I pulled at the vet's office a few months ago did in fact manage to blow that vet away! Success! I don't know of another cat who has managed to blow a vet away. The bunnies all said that only the dogs' cousin, the wolf, could accomplish such a feat, but I showed them! Maybe I'll work on blowing away a building next. Or a bus stop!

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Bear Birthplace

I'm doomed. I am really doomed this time. I'm such a nice cat. What did I ever do to deserve this? The bunnies are clustered in the human's room, along with the bears, discussing a visit to the bears' birthplace. They're trying to convince her that a visit there is sure to help sell those books she's written for children starring my delinquent teddy siblings. I think the human is listening to them, I really think she is, which worries me that such a trip, and massive sibling increases are looming in my future. And what if the bears can get free tickets to travel? They will surely expect me to go on the trip in such a case. I think it is ten hours to the home of the bears. Ten hours and the only litter box will be shared with BUNNIES!

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Horrible Bus News

I am going to have to sue the bus company. That is all there is to it. You won't believe the horror they have came up with this time. Those awful, rotten people are GIVING away tickets! Free bus tickets! I think I feel ill. The bunnies are wanting to take a look online now, to plan another little trip while their travel is free. There is even talk about going to visit the birthplace of the bears! I don't want to visit the birthplace of the bears! Do you know how many siblings such a visit could net me? The bus company will pay for this!

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Reindeer on a Bus

The reindeer was placed on a bus this evening, heading for our house. I expect she'll be here soon, although it will be my luck she will want to stop somewhere to shop first. All of my siblings and impending siblings seem to love shopping. I hope this reindeer wasn't one Santa needs, is all I can say. And if she is, I hope Santa won't hold her moving against me. It certainly wasn't my idea, and it also wasn't my idea for a bear to move along with her!

Monday, December 10, 2012

Rabbit Horde

The human let eleven bunnies hop out with her this afternoon, when she went to visit a lawyer. Why she needed to let the bunnies accompany her to a legal office is something I will never understand, but they have convinced her totally of the power of their feet to bring good luck, so they get a trip whenever she heads into any situation involving legal matters. They have her conned completely. Anyway, they came back chattering to themselves. Apparently they stopped at the homeless shelter looking to pick up one of my reindeer siblings' relations, only to find that they must make arrangements for her arrival via the internet, so now they are demanding I get off of here so they can by the deer a bus ticket to the house. And you know that they will insist that she doesn't travel alone so who knows how many siblings I might end up with soon!

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Church Report

I narrowly dodged going to Suday Sermon this morning. That squirrel was all fired up about attending, and getting his name added to the membership rolls. I was sure he was going to grab me and insist upon my attending as well, but somehow I escaped. I don't think I will get that lucky next time, though. I spotted the squirrel digging out my leash when he returned from sermon, and I don't know what else he would need it for. I don't want to go to church! I'm sure there are homeless creatures just dying to move in there! And what if I am expected to tithe? I have no desire to turn over tuna!

Saturday, December 8, 2012

More Horrors from the Relative's Visit

I can't believe this. I finally got up the nerve to check what that relative brought for gifts, and you won't believe how horrifying the packages were. She brought a giant bowl of NUTS! NUTS! The squirrel has invaded my table and is busily munching on those right now. He's sure to grow bigger as a result, and there are shells everywhere. I just know I am going to puncture a paw on one. And even worse, she brought a QUILT! So now the polar bears are all fired up, playing with it, and trying to figure out how all of them can best snuggle in it to keep warm. Can you imagine worse presents?

Friday, December 7, 2012

Relative Was Here

One of the human's relatives was just here. I wonder if I can sue for this visit. Relatives dropping in never lead to anything good for me. I'm just glad that my human was in bed at the time or she surely would have used this visit to gather details for that horrible tree of hers. At least the grandhuman doesn't do that. The visiting relation dropped off Christmas presents, though, which makes it likely the human will have to call with her thanks for the gifts soon. She'll probably ask genealogy questions then. I sense tree growth soon!

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Bus Arrived

The bus arrived today with the squirrel and the dragon, along with their luggage. The dragon seems like he will be a nice sibling, but I am deeply concerned about that squirrel. He is up to something, I am sure of it. He lagged in a giant suitcase I fear is packed full of seed, and he's already talking about attending CHURCH! I just know that the squirrel will expect me to attend Sunday sermon as well, and what if there are more siblings awaiting me at the alter? Churches seem fond of forcing massive amounts of siblings upon me. What in the world will I do if this squirrel gets me into a church and then I am presented with a horde of new siblings? I knew letting him move in was an awful idea, I just knew it!

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Still No Squirrel

The squirrel isn't here yet, and I am becoming alarmed. He is at a seed store, I just know it, stuffing his suitcase full of seed! Do you know how many pumpkin seed are in a pound? And how aggressive pumpkin are? And that squirrel is allowed fifty pounds in his suitcase. Sure, brushes to keep his tail bushy will take up some of that, but still, he will be able to pack frightening amounts of seed in there. And then what if he uses his carry-on luggage to transport seed too? We're doomed!

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Relative Horrors

I happened to check the human's email today, while looking for updates on where that squirrel is. I thought it best to keep an eye on his travels so I would know which states I should issue warnings to my fellow felines to avoid until his bus departs. Anyway, I didn't find a bus schedule update, but something much worse. The human was discussing archive visits with a cousin! I sense trouble looming. Discussing archive visits can only lead to more visits being planned, which can only lead to more bus travel. And I just know that sooner or later, those bunnies will come hopping in with a bus ticket in MY NAME! And then I will be forced to ride cramped up next to a horde of bunnies, and I will have to share a litter box with them too! Do you know what sort of litter bunnies prefer? CORN litter! Even in the box they want vegetables!

Monday, December 3, 2012

Pool Report

I can't believe this. This afternoon, the humans were once more attempting to do some work with that awful pool, with the assistance of the bunnies. I was hiding inside, hoping not to be noticed in case this work meant a pool party and zoo break might be looming in the future. I was all snuggled up in my condo, with ears tucked in under my tail. That must have muffled the hopping noises, is all I can figure, because I surely didn't hear the bunnies. It was only when I popped out to my box that I found what they had done. They snatched the mat I had right outside my box door, a not welcome mat to try to keep visiting friends of my siblings like the pandas and practically every other rabbit in the state out. They took my mat, and it is now outside, being used as a filter cover for the swimming pool! Can that get me charged as an accessory to any pool related crimes or escapes?

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Squirrel and the Bus

Well, the number of the bus the squirrel and the dragon are riding arrived in the human's email today, along with instructions on tracking their travel route. I thought about doing that, to see what the squirrel is up to, but I'm honestly a bit afraid to know. What if I look and it shows online that the bus the squirrel is on has made a stop at a seed store? You know, he's allowed fifty pounds of luggage on the bus. He could be filling that weight limit with massive amounts of seed, even as we speak!

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Still No Squirrel

There is still no sign of the squirrel. Okay, yesterday I thought his taking his time to arrive was a good thing, but upon further reflection, I am getting nervous about this delay. What if the reason it is taking the squirrel so long to get here is because his bus stopped off at a seed store so he could gather gifts for his future bunny friends? He could be picking up massive quantities of seed at this very moment! The bunnies do not need more seed! I demand that bus get a move on! If I must put up with a giant squirrel, they better hurry and get him here! I think I can take his presence better than the worry about what he could be shopping for while I'm not looking.

Friday, November 30, 2012

Watching for the Squirrel

The squirrel isn't here yet. Apparently the bus he's traveling here on with the dragon is taking the scenic route, which is fine with me. I hope it takes time to see plenty of scenery so that I am spared this squirrel's presence for a good while. I can't believe the bunnies agreed to let a squirrel that big move in. Fifteen inches plus tail! Squirrels have absolutely no business growing that large! I am sure that only trouble will result from such a big squirrel being allowed into this house, and who is going to have to put up with the trouble? Me, that is who! The squirrel will help the bunnies with their gardening for sure, and I know at his size he will be able to plant huge numbers of seed, more seed than that squirrel next door by far, which bodes ill for our neighbor. And if he likes climbing family trees, which I am afraid he might.... We are all doomed!

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Stingray Shopping

The stingray has wobbled out with the human for the last couple of days, claiming he needed to go shopping, and I am suspicious. What is he shopping for, that's what I want to know. I'm sure it isn't for anything good. None of my siblings ever shop for anything good. They just get stuff that annoys me and complicates my life. I'm sure the stingray is no different. Now I have to go check every sack in this house to see what trouble he has lagged in in a bag perched on his barbed tail.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Squirrel Alert

We are on alert for a call from the bus station here. The bunnies are eagerly awaiting news of the arrival of their new giant squirrel buddy. I still can't believe a squirrel got that big. I don't want to imagine the size of nuts he must eat. Probably they are nuts from that horrible family tree. ACK! I just had an awful notion! What if this squirrel is into genealogy and climbing family trees? I have to bar the door at once before he can get in!

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

The Squirrel

The more I think of that squirrel, who is on his way here on a bus at this very moment, the more nervous I am. I hear he is fifteen inches, not including his tail, which makes him a true giant among squirrels. Nothing good can result from a squirrel being that big. His short cousins are troublesome enough, with how they are obsessed with planting seeds. This giant squirrel is sure to be worse, and did you know squirrels are religious? This squirrel will be big enough to drag me off to church, and what if he selects a religious institution just waiting to provide me with more siblings? Churches seem to love doing that, you know. Or what if he drags me to one that practices baptism? I don't want to be dunked!

Monday, November 26, 2012

Siblings

The bunnies just made arrangements for more siblings to move in. They're being put onto their flight to our dwelling even as we speak, and I'm not sure how I should feel about this. If I can keep the dragon away from his dinosaur cousins, he might be a good sibling, but then there is the squirrel the bunnies decided to allow to move in as well. Isn't it bad enough that they're BFF with the squirrel who lives in our neighbor's tree? Now they will have a squirrel living here, and he's a giant one too, so he's sure to be able to plant lots and lots of SEED!

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Finally Happened

It finally happened. Oh, it is truly terrible! The human finally purchased a bus ticket! Sniff, sniff, sniff. She got such a good deal on in, a round trip down to that horrible archive to look up her terrible relations. And she's already so pleased about the deal she got that she's thinking of buying more tickets, to more alarming places. And the bunnies say that I can have a seat on the bus too, a seat that will be shared with THEM! And they say they will share their snacks, carrots, celery and broccoli, the entire trip! The bus company must be punished for this, and especially if they sell tickets for rabbits!

Saturday, November 24, 2012

It was Awful

Sorry I haven't posted for the last couple of days. I was hiding with the turkeys and their internet connection was a bit spotty. I just wanted to let you know that the shopping fest was a true disaster. The bunnies lagged home a car loaded full of sacks of goodies. So, so many sacks. They covered my table, which should be a crime. And as if those items that are intended as gifts for human relations, that will surely lure them into attending reunions, and encouraging that awful tree, weren't bad enough, the bunnies found a pile of merchandise for the country. They lagged home two giant sacks full of pillows to rest their big ears on so now they will be wanting to hop up there to drip the pillows off. And the shopping might have just begun!

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

24 Hours

Twenty-four hours until the disaster and ruination of commercial retail strikes. The bunnies are seriously stretching now, in ways even I as a cat and expert stretcher find alarming as part of their warm-up effort. I hope all of the stores doubled their insurance is all that I can say. As for me, I will be spending this nightmare safely hidden with my turkey renters, far away from any blame for shoppers scattered by racing rabbits.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Posting Oddity

I'm very sorry for what happened yesterday, with my blog entry appearing multiple times, although frankly it might have been for the best it was duplicated. With the threat of the bunnies taking over the human's shopping list, I'm sure that everyone is in terrible danger. They're even looking, trying to find store maps, so they can plan out their shopping route. I don't like the way they keep bouncing around either, doing various stretches, claiming they are warming up for the big day. I can see those poor stores now, with the bunnies racing about. Other patrons are sure to scatter like leaves and have to dive into the midst of display racks to dodge them!

Monday, November 19, 2012

Horrible News! Look Yourselves Away Now!

Dreadful news! The human is ill with a sinus infection. and like the other times she's taken sick, I fear that the bunnies will offer to assist her with things until she is better. Unfortunately, this assistance could mean that the bunnies will be offering to shop for the human come sale time in a few days. Those poor, poor stores. They will never survive if all of the bunnies are turned loose in their business!

Horrible News! Look Yourselves Away Now!

Dreadful news! The human is ill with a sinus infection. and like the other times she's taken sick, I fear that the bunnies will offer to assist her with things until she is better. Unfortunately, this assistance could mean that the bunnies will be offering to shop for the human come sale time in a few days. Those poor, poor stores. They will never survive if all of the bunnies are turned loose in their business!

Horrible News! Look Yourselves Away Now!

Dreadful news! The human is ill with a sinus infection. and like the other times she's taken sick, I fear that the bunnies will offer to assist her with things until she is better. Unfortunately, this assistance could mean that the bunnies will be offering to shop for the human come sale time in a few days. Those poor, poor stores. They will never survive if all of the bunnies are turned loose in their business!

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Sale Countdown

Only a few more days until all of those horrible awful sales start. I hope everyone is prepared with strong locks for your homes because the stores will be insane. The bunnies have been spending serious time aiding the human with her shopping list, which makes me think that the bunnies will be offering to hop along to help. I guess it wouldn't be too bad if they would just follow the human's list, and grab stacks of towels for gifting, but I fear they intend to all merchandise to gift to their fellow rabbits to the pile as well. And do you know what is on every rabbit's wish list? SEED! They will be seed shopping! Like I said, it will be crazy, and when you add the polar bears rushing to grab yarn, well, I wouldn't want to visit a store this week, and I hope those poor clerks all have their wills ready.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Bus is Evil

The bus company is evil, and I swear I will see them punished for this. The human was playing around on their website, and she found a wonderful deal, offering trips to that horrible national archive and their neighbor, the Department of Rabbitculture, for a dollar! A DOLLAR! The bunnies could catch this bus for a dollar, and return with giant sacks full of seed from that horrible place, and then there's what the human might return with to grow that awful tree of hers. I have to block that site!

Friday, November 16, 2012

The Bus

I don't like the way the human keeps looking at bus information at all. I'm sure that's another disaster in the making. Not only is she thinking of taking the bus in search of relations, but she's wanting to head for the birthplace of the bears, too. And you know if she goes there, all of the bears will want to go along, and they will try to drag me with them! It is a good eight hours to the bears' birthplace! Eight hours on a bus with my 742 siblings! Doesn't that violate some rule against cruel and infeline punishment? I really must find a way to block the human from visiting the buss site.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

List

I found the human's working list for Christmas. About the only good thing on it is that I don't see anyone with particularly bunny like names so far, but then it's only a working list. Perhaps the bunnies will be adding all of their bunny friends later. I know they're wanting to get something for that rabbit who installed his burrow in our backyard without permission. Really, that will only encourage him to continue his residency here if he's given a present, and probably a sock to hang up for Santa too, but the bunnies are going to insist, I just know it. I really am worried about that list of the human's though. There are a lot of names on it, and you know while she's shopping for all of those people, the bunnies are going to be on the loose, getting into who knows what in the name of helping!

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Polar Bear Video

Hello, it's Annann Polar Bear here, to share some important polar bear news. That nice soda company has a video out on the wonders of polar bears. We're sure you will love watching it here. And for every person who views this film, the soda company will donate a dollar to helping the polar bears up in Alaska expand their property holdings. Our polar bear cousins hope to have a giant portion of the state in their control soon, and you can help by viewing this wonderful video, so click now!

Bunny Lists

I wonder how worried I should be? The bunnies have offered to help the human with making her shopping lists for the holidays. Now if they were just making lists of the relations the human has to give presents to, I suppose that would be okay, but now I very much fear that this list will include information on possible presents. You know that those bunnies are going to suggest gifts that will require trips to the food co-op and the seed store, too, places where they can gather their kinds of merchandise, while the human shops! And what if they add some of their little bunny friends to the shopping list? So many seed purchases should be illegal!

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Today's Horror

The human went to the doctor today, and for some reason, as a result of this visit, she had to stop by the health food store on the way home. As you might know, this place is infested with seed, and is a highly attractive business to bunnies. Oh, you won't believe what she found in there! As if the seed weren't bad enough, she happened to find beauty items that she thinks will make wonderful Christmas gifts, so she is talking about a return visit soon for holiday shopping! Do you know how long this shopping will take? And while she's checking her list twice, the bunnies will be in the seed aisle, filling their sacks with our neighbors' doom come spring!

Monday, November 12, 2012

Thanksgiving Sales

The human just stumbled on a web page with info on the sales they have the day after Thanksgiving, that she plans to insist on attending. I suggest you all plan to spend this day locked in your houses now, because all I can see is a giant disaster looming. You won't believe this, but a store is foolishly planning to sell YARN! Yarn just perfect for making sweaters and mittens. The polar bears are looking for sacks now, to use to visit this sale and collect all of the yarn for their polar bear warmth. Anyone there is sure to be trampled by bears on the loose. And that's just the first danger this sale poses!

Sunday, November 11, 2012

The Evils of the Bus

While the human was looking at the bus schedule, and thinking of paying a visit to that horrible archive, she found something that has frightened me even more. It seems that the bus company is expanding their routes, and now offer trips out to Oklahoma, where multiple branches of that human's terrible, nightmarish tree are located. So now she's thinking about a trip, and I don't like the way she keeps talking about needing travel companions. I think she's wanting someone besides the bears to travel with her, someone like ME!

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Mailbox

The bunnies are wanting to get a mailbox. Does this sound alarming to you? The humans already have a mailbox, hanging outside the house by the woodpile, but the bunnies want a mailbox of their own. What sort of mail are they expecting that they don't want to go into the human's box? An important package from the department of rabbitculture, perhaps? And why are all of the mailboxes they are looking into purchasing listed as JUMBO SIZE? Jumbo is an elephant! Are they expecting a rush order of peanut seeds to feed a potential elephant sibling?

Friday, November 9, 2012

Adoption Season

The animal holiday adoption season has started, and my siblings are happily browsing online, looking for new siblings for me. So many potential siblings. Right now they seem especially fond of these.

I'm sure I'm not going to escape this year without a new sibling or ten, so which one would you pick if you had to?

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Stingray

The human let the stingray wobble out to the store, along with one of the bunnies this afternoon. I don't know why in the world she allowed such a thing, and I am very nervous about the things the stingray had with him when he came back, more supplies for fixing the pool! Just wonderful. Another sibling who is obsessed with swimming. It will be just my luck that he will decide that he wants to invite all of his stingray friends over for pool parties too, just like the bunnies and the penguins! We don't need the parties growing bigger!

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Human's Plans

I wonder how I can work out the best hiding place, to protect myself from the fallout from the human's possible weekend plans. And to protect myself from nuts tumbling off that awful tree of hers, of course. She's talking about trying to meet up with a cousin, wherever place she goes. Meeting with relations never ends well. The tree will sprout more limbs for sure, and worse, the human might get more ideas for that horrible family reunion of hers, and more guests to invite. No, I don't see this weekend going well at all, and I must find a way to hide from it.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

This Weekend

Today is even worse than yesterday. I heard the human talking a bit ago about going to the country, or possibly the mountains, over the weekend to celebrate her birthday. Basically, the weekend is going to be a nightmare if either of those two possible visits come to pass. I think I fear the mountains more, though. There are other bears up there for Betsy to rob, and I heard the bunnies mentioning getting library cards from the mountain libraries as well. I don't want to know the books Betsy would borrow if she had a card for up there. Probably an address book to make hunting down the mountain bears' dens easier. I anticipate a total disaster.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Birthday Report

I would like to announce that the human's birthday was a thing of true horror. I really don't know how an event could be much worse. The human did go to the country today, accompanied by the bunnies, the bears, my teddy cat sister who invited all of those siblings to move in on Friday, a tiger and a stingray. Oh, it was awful. First the human went by the archives and got the happy news that cousin James Edward is dead, and not only is he dead, but he had the nerve to leave a detailed obituary, with a long list of his survivors! Such a long, long list of survivors! Really, the nerve of this cousin, having twelve children and causing that awful tree to grow more! He should be ashamed! And then, oh, it is just horrible! The human went by two of the burrow libraries and got more cards! The bunnies even helped the stingray get a card! All of them have cards! And even worse, they're letting the bunnies recommend books for them to read, books that I am sure are focused on work or something equally nightmarish. Honestly, I don't know how a day could be much worse.

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Beanstalk

My mouse siblings watched the show their large cousin is responsible for tonight and I am very alarmed by what they aired. Wasn't it bad enough that last week's program resulted in that Franken-storm as a promotional tool. Now this week they have created a show featuring a beanstalk! A GIANT BEANSTALK! The mouse is encouraging gardening now, probably as a reward for the bunnies who live at his park dancing up that promotional storm for him. Now all of my bunny siblings are all fired up, wanting the mice to write to their large cousin right away to get seeds to grow that beanstalk. The giant mouse sells seeds in his park. What if the giant bean seed is among them? I could awaken tomorrow to find a giant beanstalk in the backyard! And who will eat all of the beans such a thing would produce? That's what I want to know!

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Monday Horror Approaches

The human has a birthday scheduled for Monday, and I am terrified of her plans for celebrating the day. She has mentioned visits to archives and libraries, and then dropping in on a few cemeteries as part of her anticipated celebrations. It's sure to be a nightmare. I've seen the rabbits lounging on the human's bed, making birthday suggestions so I know trouble is coming. I wonder if I ought to plan to spend the day in bed now, to try to avoid the horror?

Friday, November 2, 2012

Friday Nightmare

The humans went out at around noon, and I let one of the rabbits, and one of my teddy cat sisters and her kitten go with them. The humans said they were going to get pizza and then to look for the dwelling of a potential roof repairman. I though that sounded safe enough. The bunny and the cats said they would read the map, and that they would be back in no time. Little did I know. Oh, little did I know the horrors! On the way back they happened upon a church having some sort of event, and who should be there but a sister of my teddy cat sibling, along with a host of her friends. Naturally, my human just had to invite them to move in with us. There were seven of them total, 2 cats, a leopard, a monkey, a teddy pup and two bears. I am now up to 742 siblings!

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Novel Horror Month

I was distracted by the Halloween Horror Show, and it slipped my mind until this evening that the month of novel horrors starts today. I was just feeling worried, and thinking about all of the rabbit encouragement that this event always heralds, when I heard the bears talking about something even more alarming. The human is wanting to devote this month to a novel starring the BEARS! Betsy has just had all of the encouragement of Halloween! She doesn't need a book to encourage her more! And even worse, I am featured in the bear books. Sniff, sniff! I appear in a book with Betsy Bear. That will get me declared an accessory to her crimes for sure!

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Halloween Report

Halloween was a success, at least for Betsy Bear. At least 75 children came through, and suffered sack losses at Betsy's paws. The human was very impressed with the crowd, and is now talking about doubling her candy supply for next year. Doubling the supply! That can only lead to more children showing up and being robbed! And one of those children wanted to see me, too! And what if he remembers me, and holds me accountable for what Betsy did, robbing him of his goodies? Oh, and a dog came trick or treating too, so now the human is going to want to have goodies for them next year!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Candy is Here

The human went out today, and returned lagging EIGHT sacks of CANDY with her! Eight sacks of candy, and she got these little lanterns too, to hang up so that the children can be sure to find our house. Those poor, poor children. The human is even talking about hanging up signs at the end of the street, so they know where the candy is. We are in for a nightmare for sure come tomorrow night! Betsy will have the crime spree to end all crime sprees! We're doomed!

Monday, October 29, 2012

The Storm

I found out who is to blame for the storm threat that has those polar bears all fired up. Okay, the weatherman is to blame for his talks about it, and I will still see him tarred, feathered and chased out of town, but that mouse who lives in Florida is actually the guilty party who caused it! I learned of this last night, when my mouse siblings and a couple of the bears were camped out watching their weekly mouse show, only to find that Frankenstin was the star! Frankenstin and this storm is the Franken-storm. Obviously the mouse arranged this storm to promote this episode! There are bunnies who live down at his park. One of them hangs out with that bear Betsy robs every time she visits, and then there's another one who loiters around a deer. The mouse probably recruited them to dance up this storm. Well, it did what it was supposed to! It promoted the show! The mouse can just have the bunnies make it go away now!

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Snow Update

The horrible, awful weatherman is now calling for a foot of snow or more. I will see him tarred, feathered and ran out of town for this! Just see if I don't. I don't know why the police haven't stepped in yet. Surely the noise from panicked polar bears is alarming someone besides me! Over a foot of snow. They're already pitching fits, with the snow just threatening. I don't want to imagine what they will do if it actually starts to fall. I don't want to live in their den! Polar bears snore! I will never be able to sleep! This is all the weatherman's fault!

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Weatherman Must Suffer!

I have to do something to the weatherman. Really, he deserves the worst punishment that felines can dream up, to punish him for the disaster he has caused. He is calling for SNOW! The polar bears heard this awful news while they were out at that sale, which turned out to be a fabric sale, and rushed home in a panic with a pile of fabric. Now they are demanding I get into their den at once, and hand over all of my fur's nice warmth! My fur's warmth is for ME! Not for the bears! The weatherman will pay for this!

Friday, October 26, 2012

Sale Tomorrow

The human found a sale she wants to go to tomorrow, before a possible country visit, and I am concerned. This sale has a huge sign up, advertising the fact they have material available. It didn't specify if this material was the building sort of material or the fabric sort, but either kind is bad. Building material will make the bunnies want to put me to work and fabric will get the polar bears all fired up. I really ought to hide the car keys while there is still time.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Penguin Waddling Out

As if it isn't bad enough that the human lets the bunnies accompany her when she goes out, now she's letting the penguin waddle along much more than I'm sure is good, good for me, that is. I'm sure that penguin is putting horrible ideas into her head about the pool. I just heard her talking about how nice it would be to have the pool open year round. Only a penguin could have put that notion into her head! Can you imagine the parties that would occur if the pool was open all year? No one would ever get a wink of sleep!

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Polar Bear Soda

The soda company is once more donating money to the polar bears for every soda purchased. How much money do those bears need to get their paws on? They're sure to get lots from this, for the soda company is now offering a ton of good prizes on their site for entering codes from the sodas. Each soda not only gets the polar bears cash but gets the humans points towards goodies which will only lead them to purchase more sodas, causing the bears to get more money. I hope the people who have the misfortune to live in Alaska are prepared, because the bears will be taking over there for sure with their new wealth.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Pool Repairman is Coming!

The pool repairman is coming tomorrow, to hopefully correct what the first repairman did wrong. I hope the zoo has invested in extra locks for the penguins' home, because my penguin siblings are working on party invitations now, in anticipation of the pool being repaired and functional soon. The zoo has a mass of Halloween events planned, which will only make the penguins' fleeing easier if their dwelling isn't secured properly. Really, they'll probably waddle right out disguised as waiters. And do you know how loud penguin parties get? And how much fish they eat? MY FISH!

Monday, October 22, 2012

Bunnies' New Book Purchase

I really must find a way to block the bunnies' access to Amazon, or at least a way to block their way to certain reading materials offered there. They just got a new book tonight, a VEGETABLE cook book! What in the world was Amazon thinking, selling a book on cooking vegetables to rabbits, although after some of the other books they've sold to them, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised they would do this too. I ought to report them to the neighbors. Letting those bunnies learn more ways to cook vegetables can only lead to them wanting to grow more vegetables for cooking purposes, which can only lead to the expansion of their garden. Isn't that thing already big enough?

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Halloween Countdown

The Halloween countdown has begun. I do hope that people display some intelligence this year, and hide in their homes on Halloween night, when Betsy Bear takes to the streets in search of children to rob of their candy. She's already getting the snitching sacks out, and mapping out her route, to make sure that not a lollypop or a gumdrop falls into any sack but hers by the end of the night. Really, I don't know why those parents keep letting their children try to collect candy. Do they really deserve to suffer so?

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Tree Online

I suggest everyone back away from your computers now before it is too late. The human is putting the family tree up at one of those horrible, awful online sites. She is sure that putting the awful, dangerous tree up will lead to her finding loads more relations. Well, I can tell you want that tree being posted will lead to, a DISASTER! Look out for falling nuts crashing your computers at any moment! RUN!

Friday, October 19, 2012

TV

This doesn't bode well. The human is trying to work out how she can get television reception, possibly on her laptop, up in the country. A good episode of one of her favorite shows comes on next Friday, and there isn't a functional TV up there for her to watch it on. I was optimistic this meant that she would stay home, but now the bunnies have put the idea into her head of watching online. I have to find a way to sabotage this!

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Diving

The penguins are practicing their diving form, bouncing up and down on the beds and the couches, trying to touch their beaks to their webbed feet. Not a good sign. Diving practice makes me think they are planning on doing a bit of swimming soon, and penguins going swimming can only lead to them inviting other penguins over to take a dip. And the other penguins are likely to be from the zoo, too. I don't know why in the world that place hasn't done something to up their security. Surely penguin escapes can't be good for business.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

What to Hide First

I need to to decide what I must hide first, the car keys or the phone. Not only is a country trip being threatened, but now there is the threat that the human will call a pool repairman in who might know what they are doing to fix the mess the first repairman made. Even though it's getting nippy, a repaired pool still has the potential for leading to penguin pool parties and zoo escapes. And all of MY fish being snatched to be served to party guests! All of my fish! I guess that means the phone should go first. Now to figure out where to hide it, and how to silence the ringer so it won't be found.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Keys

Perhaps I can hide the keys to the car before Thursday. If I don't, I fear that the humans will go to the country again with the rabbit horde, which spells bad news for me. Either I will be captured and drug along, to possibly be put to work or suffer family tree exposure, or else the human will let those bunnies loose in a library again. Oh, how I fear it will be the library. It will be my luck it will be the library for sure. Really, why haven't the bunnies gotten eye strain by now from all of the reading they have been doing? Surely the carrots can't be that good for their eyes!

Monday, October 15, 2012

Cemetery Report

The country visit continues to plague me, even though the humans are back at the moment. The human visited two cemeteries while she was in the country, and came home with the news of the death dates of several relatives she was looking for. The problem is that our local paper doesn't seem to have their obituaries, which means that now the human is all fired up to go to the country, to visit another library there in search of this information. Visiting another library. That can only lead to the growth of that tree, and to the bunnies getting more cards!

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Washing Paws

I'm back, and I think my poor paws are ruined, but hopefully I have ruined something that made the rabbits happy, as a punishment for their country antics. The human got a bunny pajama top yesterday, and left it here before she departed for the country with the bunnies. I spent the night soaking it in hot water to encourage shrinkage. The human tried it on again when she came home this afternoon, and was horrified to find that it was too small. Hehehehehehe. My paws are messed up from all the water, but it was worth it. You should see how upset the bunnies are that the top will have to be returned. Hehehehehehe!

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Josie Rabbit Posting

Hi, I just wanted to let you know that we are in the country this evening, so our brother will not be posting. We left him a cell phone, but he claims it is too hard to type on the keyboard, so he will be blogless until tomorrow. Really, he should have rode up with us. We don't know what in the world he is so alarmed about. There are many nice cats here that we're sure would be wonderful friends.

Friday, October 12, 2012

Tomorrow

A red alert for the country should be issued for tomorrow. It's bad enough that the bunnies want to hop up there to collect library cards, but now Betsy wants to go as well. She heard the humans discussing inviting a baby to visit the country, and now she's drooling, picturing the potential candy she can get her paws on. Surely with as many rabbit friendly businesses that are up there, the people who have made the mistake of living in the country have doubled their insurance, though, or at least for their sake, I hope they have. They will need it, if Betsy gets loose.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Comics

The bunnies hopped out today, and when they returned, they presented me with 9 issues of the comic starring my favorite feline, Dex-Starr. I have been asking for this comic for a year, and the bunnies suddenly produced nine issues, and a promise to try to get the most recent four issues to bring things current. What in the world are they up to?

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Library Cards Obtained

The bunnies went to the library, and a parrot happily provided the lot of them with more little cards. That bird ought to be ashamed of himself, and the dogs that were loitering around the library should be ashamed too. Apparently there was a canine there when the rabbits hopped in, looking for a copy of The Hound of the Baskervilles, and he didn't do a thing about those rabbits! He even offered to scoot over a bit, if they wanted to check out the shelf he was examining, to try to find books! This is horrible, and who knows what else they will find to do this weekend? They want MORE cards!

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Country Library Update

The bunnies found a branch of one of the country libraries quite nearby, and now they're hopping around, wanting the human to drop in there tomorrow afternoon, to allow them to get cards. I have a horrible feeling the human might agree to this, since she's been reading a lot lately, and the bunnies are tempting her with the thought that this library might have a ton of interesting books just waiting for her. And what if they have books on work? Or on gardening? They're awfully fond of vegetables in the country, which does not bode well for potential reading selections!

Monday, October 8, 2012

Voting

We're doomed. That's all that I can say. Betsy Bear popped into a place where they host early voting today, and I think they may have actually let that bear turn in a ballot! She probably voted to legalize honey theft and taking candy from babies! And just when the humans involved in the election were getting as annoying as I thought possible, that bear sticks her paws into things. What if her cousins in the bear mafia get involved too? Who knows how many crimes they could make legal if they get their paws on enough ballots!

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Tomorrow

The humans are talking about going to the country tomorrow, to gather more building supplies. They went out this afternoon, to get an idea of what they might need, and would you believe they let a bunny hop along with them? I'm sure that cotton tailed troublemaker put enough ideas into their heads that a trip to the country will happen. And that means there is a danger that a trip to a country library will happen! The bunnies will get loads of little cards, and will find loads of books on work, I just know it! How can the library keep letting them hop in like they do? Isn't there some law about letting bunnies read so much? It surely isn't good for cats!

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Country Libraries

The bunnies called one of the horrible rabbit friendly country libraries today, to research how to get their paws on more library cards, and got happy news on how easy it will be. They're wanting to hop up there tomorrow, so they can go card gathering bright and early on Monday. And I very much fear they want to take me, so I can help carry their giant pile of little cards. We have just had a cold snap! I would be in danger of freezing my fur off if I was lagged to the country! Not to mention I'm sure it's against some sort of feline cruelty law to make a cat go to rabbit friendly libraries. What if the bunnies get to talking to the library's other cotton tailed patrons? It would be my luck they would get more recommendations for books on work!

Friday, October 5, 2012

Power Failure

The lights just went off, and I suspect it was an attempt by the bunnies to prevent me from posting, and telling you about the horrors of today. The human went to the country today, to visit the library, accompanied by those rabbits. She came home, happily lagging a pile of obituaries that will make that horrible tree of hers grow even more. And the bunnies came home crowing about the library. It has an underground burrow like section too, and to make it even more animal friendly, it has quilts hanging up, for the comfort of visiting polar bears. The bunnies hope to hop up there again next week, and to another library the found right down the road to add to their card collection. Oh, and to make things even worse, the bunnies found a church holding a benefit on the way up to the country. There was a bear loitering there, and of course they invited her to move right in. The sibling count is 733, and the horror count is unimaginable.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Red Alert!

Red Alert! Red Alert! A truck just zoomed by, spraying our area for mosquitoes! The human is allergic to such things, and after her last extremely limited exposure broke out in disgusting looking hives! So now she is hiding in her room planning to take preemptive doses of anti-histimines. What if she does break out? Do you know how truly horrible hives are to view? Can I hold the city accountable for forcing such a sight upon my tender kitty eyes?

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Possible Country Trip

The bunnies are talking about a possible country trip within a day or so. They have got the human all fired up about venturing to the country to do more research on that terrible, awful, nightmarish tree, so I very much worry that this trip might happen. And even worse than the potential tree growth a visit to the country could cause is the bunnies' plan to visit a few country libraries! The bunnies have been discussing some of these libraries, too, and did you know that at least one other country library has an underground section? Another rabbit friendly library! Where are the cat friendly libraries? Surely there have to be some out there, filled with books on napping and laziness!

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

New Rabbit Novel

I have a horrifying announcement to make. I don't want to frighten everyone, but you probably need to know so you will understand should you feel ground shaking. It's not an earthquake, or people rolling over in their graves as humans look silly over this election thing. It is the rabbits celebrating the release of a new rabbit novel.



The Further Tale of Peter Rabbit, an adventure of my rabbit siblings' relation, which you can purchase here should you be into horror. It just came out, and the rabbits learned of it today when they saw some sort of news release so now they are racing to plan parties. Soon hopping will fill the land, and breakables will tumble from shelves as the vibrations caused by big bunny feet bouncing around are felt. What in the world was this author thinking, writing a bunny book, and letting it be published? It will only lead to encouragement for those rabbits!

Monday, October 1, 2012

Backyard Bunny

There is a bunny, one of the undomesticated sort, living in our backyard, I am horrified to announce. I spotted him lagging in his bunny furniture a while back, and establishing a burrow, and burrow that he is paying no rent on, I would like to add. Now he's taken to hopping about the yard, and worse yet, posing for the human to take pictures of him! And do you know what the human plans to do with those pictures? She plans to use them to help make a cover for those awful bunny books of hers! This rabbit is assisting with book construction!

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Can't Believe It

I can't believe this, and you can be sure I will be calling the authorities. First, the human went out to a buffet, and let one of the rabbits hop along, and get a take home platter to feed all of his fellow bunnies from the salad bar. What was that restaurant thinking, giving a bunny a take home container? Then, to make the thing a true disaster, she let the bunny hop into a store with her, a store that is another branch of the place that provided him cheep seed. And you won't believe what this place did. They patted his EARS! They said he was a good bunny and gave him a free sack of seed packets! He hopped home with free seed! That must violate some law! FREE SEED! I feel ill!

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Country Libraries

The bunnies didn't get to the country this weekend, but I am a bit concerned about what they did manage to do. The lot of them did a bit of checking, and it seems that all of the branches of the country libraries are separate, requiring one card for each place, so now they are talking about hopping around to every branch, to collect a pile of cards, and thus a pile of BOOKS! Isn't the one library they visited bad enough? I don't even want to imagine what the other country libraries are like after how rabbit friendly one of them was. Really, they put it underground like a burrow. Why didn't they just hang up a sign saying they love rabbits, and put a little door to the side to make it easier for them to hop in? And one of the other places where a library is located is named after a vegetable, so I'm sure it is even more rabbit friendly. Doomed, I am doomed! They will get a pile of cards, and hop home with a mountain of books on vegetables and work!

Friday, September 28, 2012

Sheep Show

The television people should be ashamed of themselves. They have really done it this time. Honestly they have. They aired a show tonight featuring human sized SHEEP! Giant sheep, and naturally, the polar bears came rushing in and got all worked up over the show. Now they have a horrible idea in their heads, and are clustered together, talking about the amount of wool such a sheep would provide, and how best to capture and sheer one of them. Next they will be going in search of giant scissors! Television should be ashamed!

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Tomorrow's Assault

The repairman didn't return today to fix the pool. I knew he was going to do that, I just knew it. Really, he ought to ashamed of himself. There is a wheelbarrow full of sand in our backyard now, just tempting black cats to hop the fence and turn into a giant litter box thanks to him and the bunnies are on the warpath. I have been ordered to the refrigerator to be issued a carrot and a stick of celery and the bunnies are negotiating with the woodpecker and some squirrels to take down a tree and crush the repairman's car. I do hope he's insured is all that I can say, but he so deserves what the bunnies have planned.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Wonder of Wonders

Wonder of wonders, the pool repairman actually put in an appearance this afternoon. I was sure he had fled the country. Unfortunately, the pool isn't fixed. He claimed that it needed a part he didn't have with him, but he hopes he can find and bring back tomorrow. All I can say is that I hope that he does return, for he is doomed if he tries to escape again. The bunnies recruited some birds to trail him, and find the location of his dwelling. They're planning an assault on his house should he fail to return and repair the pool. I wonder if I should hide now. I suspect the assault plan they're drawing up might be slightly illegal.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Today's Pool Update

The pool repairman is rumored to be putting in an appearance tomorrow, although after so long, I will believe it when I see it. In the event that he does show, the bunnies are preparing for him. The lot of them are arming themselves with carrots, with the intent of holding him prisoner until the pool is fixed. I have already been informed that I should report to the refrigerator first thing in the morning to be issued a carrot. Normally I would object to assisting the bunnies with anything, but I think I might have to go along with this. If that repairman doesn't do his job, they're going to invite a whale to move in for sure!

Monday, September 24, 2012

Monday Pool Update

No sign of the pool repairman today. I'm starting to really suspect that he has changed his name and fled the country. I watched him from the sliding glass door, and honestly he had a shifty look about him, so I feel this is highly possible. Now the human is talking about taking him to court. The courthouse is by the ARCHIVES! She absolutely does not need to go up there! Maybe I ought to volunteer to help the bunnies hang up wanted posters of the repairman, although I'm not sure that putting the phrase "Wanted Dead or Alive" is entirely the way to go.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Pool Update Again

The top of the pool remains clean, even though the bottom is a disaster. I'm not sure if that's a good sign or not. The bunnies have consulted with our dolphin sister, and she keeps talking about how she's sure a creature much bigger than her, such as a whale, could clean the bottom easily. That doesn't seem a good sign. I want this whale talk stopped at once. We do not need a whale moving in. Can you imagine how much fish a whale would eat, fish that should be mine? My one hope is that the repairman shows up tomorrow. And if he does, I hope he is prepared, for the bunnies have chains ready to use against him.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Pool Update

The pool is somehow clear, or at least the top of it is, much to the delight of the bunnies. The problem is that the bottom is still messed up, and thanks to our delinquent pool repairman, who I suspect has skipped the country, the vacuum will not work and allow it to be cleaned. So, the bunnies are looking at alternatives. The most alarming one at the moment is inviting a whale to move in. They believe that such a creature could dive to the bottom easily, to remove the algae remains and get the pool sparkling clean. They want a WHALE to move in! I don't want a whale sibling!

Friday, September 21, 2012

Gardening

You will never believe this. I thought with the coming of fall that I was safe from gardening, but I was horribly wrong. Another patch was dug today, and kale, collards, turnips and mustard was planted in alarming amounts. And I just spotted the bunnies reading an article in the paper, and discussing other things to plant tomorrow. They're talking about putting out PEAS! I'm sure that peas are aggressive vegetables! When are those rabbits going to stop gardening?

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Annoying Library

I was pawing through the computer heading for the blog, when I happened across the bunnies' bookmarked country library site. You won't believe the number of rabbit friendly titles that place offers. What could a library possibly need with 15 copies each of The Joy of Work and Overcoming Laziness, except to provide rabbits with reading material to torment cats? And they make it so easy to order more books too, with just a paw click. There must be someone this place can be reported to. Rabbits do not need such a bunny friendly organization running loose!

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

HISS!!!

The bunny hopped out with the human again today, so I was living in fear of more seed purchases. What he returned with, though, oh how I wish it had been seed! The human let the bunny get a book, this book

The Rabbit Handbook! It's a guide to the wonder of bunnies and how bunnies should be waited upon. The bunnies are flipping through the pages now, and are talking about forcing me to read this rabbit work next, so I will learn how I should behave towards my cotton tailed siblings. Do you know what other cats would do if they knew I read a bunny book? I will see this author persecuted for publishing such a book, and then failing to prevent it from falling into the paws of rabbits! Any of number of laws have to have been violated!

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

And Yet More Trouble

A black cat must be nearby. I'm sure one of those evil felines is in the area, and I will have the authorities loosed on them for inflicting so much bad luck upon me, just see if I don't. I know it has to be against some law to do this. One of the bunnies hopped out with the human to the doctor today, and on their way home they stopped at the store for mosquito repelling candles. They found the candles, but then the bunny found something even more frightening. SEED! Seed, and extremely reasonably priced seed too. When he hopped home he was lagging a sack full of little packs, 18 total, which only cost 32 cents, including tax! Sniff, sniff, sniff! So, so many vegetables and at such a good price. Only a black cat bent on causing bad luck could be to blame for this! I'm sure it was one of Nick the Cat's relations!

Monday, September 17, 2012

More and More Trouble

The country stay is turning out even worse than expected, and I thought those 732 siblings were as bad as it could get. But now the human's got all fired up over some family info she found up there, and she's poking more at that awful tree. Really, people ought to be ashamed of encouraging her so. Our poor neighbors are sure to find a nut from the tree smashed through their living room ceiling when they return from the vacation that I can only hope is nicer than mine. Some cousin even dared to have pictures of relations in the write-up the human got copies of from that archive, so now the human's all fired up to chat with this relation, and get better pictures. Another trip to the country is sure to occur, and what if I am drug along this time? I could be taken as an accessory to that tree's frightening growth spurt!

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Grr! Grr! Grr!

The humans are back from the country once more, and the bunnies were forced to relinquish my computer. It was so annoying, being stuck with the cell phone, and getting texts from the bunnies about the wonders of the country every five minutes, and how they can't wait for me to join them there. And I'm very much afraid I might be heading there soon. The only issue that was keeping me here was the fact that the hot water is out up there, meaning the humans must come home for showers, so my feeding is taken care of. But then my human remembered the campground down the road, with its bathhouse, so that might not be an issue any longer. Growl! The bunnies shared that news when they hopped in, along with the news that the porch needs sanding, and that they are sure I will just love that job. Oh, and they ran into some other bears in the country too, so I now have 732 siblings. What a rotten vacation!

Friday, September 14, 2012

Growl!

I managed to somehow escape being captured and drug to the country, but I am still unhappy. First the bunnies took my computer along with them when they hopped up there, and left me with an old cell phone so they could send text messages on how the work is progressing, and how nice the country is. Well, they're not fooling me! I know the country is not nice with all of the vegetables and rabbits running free. Anyway, the humans came back for more clothes a bit ago, so I was able to post this. Now I have to hide again, in case the bunnies told them to pack me among their wardrobe selections when they return.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Must Hide, Must Hide Tonight!

I have to find a hiding place right away. Surely there is somewhere good that the bunnies won't think of checking for me. Oh, it is truly a nightmare. The humans lagged a large pile of wood to the country this morning, and they have their bags packed to return there tomorrow to work. WORK! And I heard the bunnies talking a bit ago about capturing me, with two bunnies on my front paws and two on my back to drag me along to assist with this work. Where in the world can I hide?

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Pool Repair

The library, that den of rabbit encouragement, has done it this time. They supplied two books on swimming pools, and on pool repair. The bunnies are eagerly reading them, and carrot shaped bookmarks are poking out of the books in alarming numbers. And I don't like the way the bunnies keep looking at me as they read and then how they start whispering. I'm sure I heard one of them saying something about how the cat could squeeze beneath the pipes to work on clearing them. I'M the CAT! They're planning to put me to work! And worse, they're planning to put me to work near water! My fur will be ruined! Isn't there a human that is supposed to be doing this?

Monday, September 10, 2012

Back with Dreadful News

I am back with horrible, awful news. The human went to the country with the bunnies today, just like the posted last night I am truly sorry to announce. Her first stop was at the archive where she got 40 pages of genealogy material to cause that tree to grow alarmingly. A nut is going to fall off of there at any moment, I just know it, and we will all be squished. And, then to make the situation worse, she went to the library for a card. And you should have heard the bunnies talking when the hopped back. It seems the country library is located underground, much like a rabbit burrow! A totally bunny friendly establishment, although I don't know what else I could expect from a place out in the country. I don't want to imagine the sorts of books they stock there, probably a ton of garden stuff for their cotton tailed customers.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Country Tomorrow, We Hope

We're hoping to go to the country tomorrow, so the human can get that library card, and so she can go to the archives. Our brother's pitching a fit. We don't know what in the world he thinks might happen at the library, or maybe it is the archive he is concerned about. Either way, he's running around, acting like the sky will be falling, or nuts will be dropping off the family tree at any moment. Most annoying.

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Country Soon

Josie still. Really, our brother just looks s funny. Where the flea medication was applied, his fur is sticking straight up like he has a little mohawk on his head. We asked him if that meant he might like to help us with a rain dance, since he has the look down, but you won't believe how he objected. Enough about that, though. We have high hopes for going to the country next week. The human really wants to go, and to do some research on her family tree while she's up there too. We'll have so much fun! And maybe we can introduce our brother to some nice country cats. Surely some felines up there know the meaning of the word work!

Friday, September 7, 2012

Josie Rabbit Reporting

Hi, it's Josie. Our brother will be off for a few days. A flea was spotted this morning, so medication had to be applied. And until it soaks in, he isn't allowed in our human's room, so we bunnies will be running the blog. And we couldn't believe what our brother had to say about our greenhouse plans. Really, what is his objection to a greenhouse? We have high hopes that we could grow a giant pumpkin in it, and possibly watermelon too!

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Habitat Visit

Habitat for Humanity visited today, and wonder of wonders, they didn't drop off any new residents. They did something much, much worse, and really, our neighbors ought to call the law on them for their horrible actions. They provided the human with information on constructing a GREENHOUSE from those old glass doors the humans were trying to get rid of. Do you know what will happen if the bunnies get their paws on a greenhouse?

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Library

I heard the human talking a bit ago about visiting a library in the country to get a card to obtain books from up there. That is not good, is not good at all. If the human is able to obtain books from the horrible country library, that means she intends to stay up there for awhile, and means my being captured and drug along are highly likely. And what if the human makes friends at the country library? Then they will want to host her bunny books, leading to rabbit encouragement! And I don't want to think of the number of rabbits that must patronize that library. The one here certainly allows enough bunnies to hop in for reading material. I'm sure the country is much worse.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Points

The human entered some points she got for a program my litter supplier offered today, and is now checking out the goodies the points can be exchanged for. I was fine with this, but then when I popped into her room to see what merchandise she might be looking into obtaining, I spotted the bunnies, looking over her shoulder and offering suggestions. Now I am horribly alarmed. Who knows what the bunnies will suggest the human get with the points that I earned! Do you think a cat litter company would carry vegetable related merchandise?

Monday, September 3, 2012

A Few Weeks

I just heard the human discussing going to the country for an extended trip in a few weeks. She was talking about spending days and days up there, with ME along for the trip! And if they spend a good bit of time up there, I very much fear that I will be going. I might get out of being drug along for an overnight trip, but for longer, it is either go or be shipped off to jail. I wonder if the vet has forgiven me yet for my last visit?

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Pool Update

The pool is back to its usual green color, and the rabbits are royally ticked. I do hope the pool repairman has doubled his insurance, and has updated his will for the bunnies have horrible things planned, should they get their paws on him. My one comfort from all of this is that the green pool is distracting the rabbits nicely from their urges to hop up to the country, with me along for the ride.

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Bunny Books

Okay, I am alarmed. I heard the human just a bit ago, discussing the plots for some of the bunny novels with the grandhuman. Discussion means that she is thinking about those frightening bits of rabbit encouragement! Thinking can only lead to writing, and writing can only lead to those rabbits getting even more fired up than they already are. She's even wanting to go to the country for a bit of research!

Friday, August 31, 2012

Pool Update

The pool repairman finally arrived, and I fear that what he did this time might have actually fixed the pool. The human was saying something about how it was looking much better when she limped in after supervising the work. Just perfect. The penguins heard her, and now they're planning a little party! And of course that means inviting all of the zoo penguins to waddle over to celebrate with them. The zoo is along the route to the country! My penguin siblings will probably recruit the human to collect their party guests on the way back if she goes up there this weekend!

Thursday, August 30, 2012

This Weekend

I just heard something frightening. I really must find a hiding place right away in case the human was serious. I was lounging in the kitchen just a bit ago when she came in, and the next thing I knew, she was asking if I wouldn't like to go to the country this weekend! She said I could spend the weekend playing with the bunnies up there! Do you know the sorts of games rabbits like to play? They like egg hunts and worse yet, carrot hunts! I don't want to spend my weekend hunting vegetables!

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Laundry

I've been sleeping next to the washer lately. It's nice there, and the metal is wonderfully cool, so I've been enjoying myself tremendously. Well, I was enjoying my new snoozing place until today, that is, when a bunny hopped through and spotted me. So now the cotton tailed troublemakers have got the notion into their heads, that since I am sleeping by the washer, that I can supervise laundry, and poke loads in, and then lag them out once they're done. Do you know how many siblings I have? If I am forced to do laundry for all of them, I will be trapped forever!

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

More Worried Now

I'm getting even more worried about that scheduled visit by the Habitat for Humanity truck. I was lurking, watching the bunnies when they went hopping into the human's room, and I overheard them offering to wait for the truck next week and handle everything with the donation. They are up to something. They're probably plotting to let a truck full of new relations come trotting in! I don't want a truck of new relations!

Monday, August 27, 2012

Habitat for Humanity

Okay, I am alarmed. The human placed a call to Habitat for Humanity today. As some of you might recall, that place decided to provide homes for a few bears by having them move in here. The human said she called them to pick up some doors, and other furniture like items, but they are coming in a truck next week. What if more bears are in that truck? Really, I was sure that those people were supposed to build homes, not add more residents to existing dwellings, but it doesn't seem to work that way with the branch around here. How can I make sure they just pick up stuff, and don't drop off anything?

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Dream

The human just had an alarming dream and came trotting in to share it in the hopes that means it would come true. She dreamed that the green swimming pool suddenly cleared, and became suitable for swimming. And what in the world am I going to do if that does happen? The bunnies and penguins will want to have a party for sure, and I will never get any sleep with the noise of them jumping and splashing about!

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Lazy Frogs

The bunnies are getting ready to go on the warpath about that pool repairman failing to show up but they ought to go after those frogs first, in my opinion. They were allowed to move in rent free to control the mosquitoes, since the human seems allergic to most repellants, and they have fallen down horribly on the job. All they do all day is hop around, taking advantage of the green pool that is only suitable for their swimming pleasure at the moment, and croak up a horrible operetta at night. Why don't the bunnies do something about that first?

Friday, August 24, 2012

Wouldn't Want to be the Repairman

I really wouldn't want to be the pool repairman when the bunnies catch him. They're thinking about sending out an alert to every rabbit in the area, to be in the lookout for him, and with as many bunnies are there are, hopping about in this town, he's sure to be caught. Not only are the bunnies ticked about not being able to swim, but now they're concerned the green pool might attract mosquitoes, intent on turning the human into a giant bite. I told them that we have a family of frogs loitering outside, who are supposed to be controlling these things, and if there are mosquitoes, they should be blamed for falling down on the job, but the bunnies seem determined to add this to the pool repairman's long list of failings.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

No Repairman Today

The repairman didn't show up today either, so the bunnies all have their cotton tails in a twist over their continuing lack of opportunities to swim. Do you think I have any moral obligation to warn him that I spotted the rabbits drawing up a plan a bit ago for a trap to punish him for the green pool that has been created due to his failure to turn up? They borrowed some snares from Betsy Bear, so I think this trap might be serious.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Swimming Pool

No sign of the pool repairman yet, although there is some chance he might show up tomorrow. The bunnies are talking of waiting in the backyard to complain should he put in an appearance. The pool is a nice frog green color, thanks to something that was messed up on his first visit, preventing the bunnies from jumping in for a dip so they aren't happy at all. I wonder if I'm required to issue a warning to the pool repairman, that he might be facing a backyard full of swimsuit clad rabbits upon his arrival?

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Human Stomach Report

The human's feeling slightly better, but she still thinks her stomach is messed up a bit, so I'm trying to take precautions and keep my distance from her in case a meal makes a return trip. Really, we cats handle such manners so neatly, unlike humans where things go everywhere. I swear if this thing lingers much longer, though, I must do something to punish that clown that the human thinks sold her bad food. Isn't it bad enough the clown caters to the polar bears?

Monday, August 20, 2012

Another TV Viewing

The human just watched another TV show. I was more than a bit concerned, since when she watched this show last week, my table ended up taken over by my mass of siblings. For some reason tonight, though, maybe because the human was running late on starting the episode, they all stayed in her room, probably watching on the computer. Of course, since she got a late start with the episode, she'll probably want to watch again on Friday, which means I might have my table taken over then.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Human Report

The human still claims not to be feeling well, although she did drag herself out of bed for long enough to watch a program on that large mouse's network a bit ago. I don't like how she's looking, though, like her last meal could make a repeat trip at any moment. And how am I supposed to get service if she's taken to her bed with a stomach bug all day?

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Short Post Tonight

My post tonight will be short. The human thinks she ate something that disagreed with her for breakfast, and her stomach is quivery. The computer is in her room, and I don't want to be too close in case breakfast makes a return trip.

Friday, August 17, 2012

I'm Back

I'm back, and really, the nerve of those bunnies, trying to keep me from blogging just because of a tiny scratch. It wasn't like I MEANT to do major damage, and they have no right to insist on a clawacure. Anyway, they're all in the tub anyway, scrubbing their ears. A pipe came loose under the house that required much crawling about in the dirt to reach and fix. The bunnies had some idea that I should be made to help with this. Thank goodness I was able to hide, and dodge their attempt to make me work. Do you know how bad dirt is for cat fur, and with the water from the leaking pipe, it was really more like mud!

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Clawacure Booked

Josie Rabbit here. Our brother was horrible this evening, racing around to all of the windows and trying to yell out of them. We're not sure how he thought he would be heard, with the windows shut tight, and we're not sure who he was yelling at either, although if it was one of our squirrel or bunny friends, we're sure we'll find a complaint on our door in the morning. Anyway, Pinky got himself all wired up, and then he jumped on the grandhuman and clawed her. There was an awful lot of blood as a result, so he is being punished by being banned from the computer, and by our making arrangements for his clawacure.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Whispering

I heard those bunnies whispering to the human again, offering up book ideas, and then talking about how a visit to the country would be so nice so she could do book research. I wonder if I have time to figure out how to sabotage the car? I don't think capturing the rabbits and dragging them off the bed will work. There are too many of them, and even if I was able to grab and restrain a few, more would just hop into their place.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Family Trees for Others

Just wonderful. Now the human is looking at poking at someone else's family tree, as a gift for them. Does anyone know if there is a software program to block genealogy websites, so I can prevent this? Looking for genealogy stuff for another person will mean the human will be on these sites for even longer, which can only lead to her finding things for her own horrible tree as well!

Monday, August 13, 2012

Television

The human decided to watch television tonight, and on the big television and not the computer too. I would have found a hiding place, so as to not be subjected to possible odd ideas of entertainment, but then to make the situation worse, my siblings came trotting in and took over MY table! The lot of them came trotting in, and before I knew it, I was surrounded and trapped! Forced to watch television with the bunnies, bears and the groundhogs too, since they thought one of their cousins might be in this episode. And this will repeat again next week! I wonder if I have time to sabotage the televison? I don't want to watch human programing!

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Horror Novel Plotting

There has to be a way to take out the electricity, or in some way cripple the human's writing attempts. I don't like the amount of time she's spending, looking at the bunny novels, or thinking out plots for those horrible bear books. So much horror. Isn't there some sort of law about putting such terror out there where innocent people can see it? And if the human gets the bear books done, it's sure to encourage Betsy Bear. That bear being encouraged could lead to the fall of the neighborhood! I have to find a way to stop this! Maybe I could attack the fuse box?

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Rain Dance

Who knew that there were so many issues with a rain dance? Of course, some of them might be due to the fact the dance instructions are meant for big bunny feet, instead of fine, well shaped cat paws, but still, I don't know how I'm ever going to figure out how to do this, and I absolutely have to. Now the human is looking at the volume of those horrible novels where the bunnies go to CHURCH! I want to shudder, just imagining the horrors if the human gets that one published. It will only lead churches to thinking rabbits want to attend, and they will start making their buildings even more rabbit friendly. Isn't it bad enough they make their church sales bunny friendly?

Friday, August 10, 2012

Friday Activity Report

The human decided not to go to the bakery, since the refrigerator repairman ended up tying up half the day. Such an annoying repairman. I don't care if the fridge is where my cheese is located. I was thrown into jail when he showed up and was highly inconvenienced. The human has been talking about those novels a good bit, though, which makes me fear she really might do something about writing this weekend. I wonder if I could find a book with one of the rabbits' rain dances, to keep her home, or possibly knock out the power and cripple the laptop?

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Must Stop This

I must drag those bunnies off the bed by their floppy ears right away. They're determined to cause trouble for me, the lot of them. You won't believe what they've done this time. They chattered to the human, and now she's wanting to go and lounge at the bakery to work on her novels tomorrow, including that frightening novel starring Betsy Bear! Really, there are enough horror novels out there. Does something that terrifying need to be released? Think of all of the heart attacks!

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Can't Believe the Human

I can't believe the human. The bunnies are a bad influence, is the only explanation I can think of for this. I just heard the human saying how much she would enjoy living in the country at the cottage! THE COUNTRY! Do you know how many vegetables are in the country, whole fields of them just down the road! No, the human absolutely can't move the country. I refuse to become a country kitty! Isn't it bad enough the bunnies want me to vacation up there?

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Bunnies Getting Bolder

My rabbit siblings' bunny friends are growing bolder. Usually they lurk in the backyard, which is okay, since then no one will see them, and think that I approve of their presence. This afternoon one of them got bold, though, and was lounging openly in the front yard for all the world to see, and to get the impression that this is a rabbit house! I'm sure those horrible relations of Nick the Cat who lurk around, spreading bad luck saw the bunny, and were laughing. Does anyone have suggestions for putting this bunny in his place, in the back? He looks rather fat and sassy. I'm not sure if I could net and drag him back there.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Earmuffs

Does anyone know what sort of earmuffs I would need to purchase to block the noise of bunny whispers? I must slip a pair onto the human's ears right away. Really, I don't know why in the world she keeps letting those rabbits lounge on her bed. I'm sure they scatter carrot crumbs everywhere. She lets the lot of them stay there, though, and they just amused themselves whispering another idea for a bunny story to her. Is there no end to those things?

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Cake

One of our neighbors had a death in the family, which is of course horribly tragic, but now the humans have made it more tragic by giving them a cake, chocolate flavored with a fudgy topping. I think you can all guess how Betsy Bear reacted to a desert being donated to anyone but her. She's in the human's room right now, watching the neighbors' house, plotting to pop in when they're at the funeral, and relieve them of the cake, and any other snacks she can find. I wonder if I have time to flee the area before this robbery? I don't want to be anywhere in the vicinity when Betsy attacks the food.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Alibi!

If anyone asks, I was here all day. I was right here, and thus can't be held accountable for anything that might have happened at that giant yard sale. It's almost too horrible to write, and I am expecting the law to arrive at any moment to take that horrible, awful bear into custody. Every year, Betsy amuses herself at this sale, robbing the senior citizens of all of their goodies while the human is looking at the book sale they always have, and then that bear hits the American Legion and the Veterans of Foreign Wars. Well, this year both groups were missing! MISSING! And I'm sure their vanishing act is due to Betsy Bear's antics. Oh, the law will be here soon for sure. How long do you think that Betsy will get for driving those poor, poor people back to some foreign war in hopes of escaping her?

Friday, August 3, 2012

Tomorrow

The human is wanting to go to a yard sale tomorrow. Needless to say, I am concerned it might be that big one she enjoys visiting so. I just saw Betsy Bear trotting by with her extra snitching sacks in case it is. Really, I don't know why those people keep trying to sell stuff at these events. I'm sure they can't make a profit with that bear running loose. I just hope they thought to double their insurance this year while they still have time.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Video

The bunnies are poking around, looking for a book on creating book trailers. I fear that soon they will decide to look up videos on making videos too. I think I'm in trouble. Since I kept saying I didn't want to be in the movie, I think the bunnies and the bears intend to put me to work filming! Just perfect. A day of following those rabbits around, shooting footage of them and I don't want to think of what filming Betsy will be like. That is a horror film waiting to happen. Can I be held accountable for things that might be in the film, if I am the cat in charge of the camera?

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

And More Video Trouble

Oh, this is getting worse! Now the bears are wanting to make a video too, and that will require my presence. A bear video. Betsy Bear on video. That ought to get the film an X rating right there. Now how in the world can I avoid appearing in this video with that bear? I do not want to appear on film with her and look like an accessory to her delinquent behavior. As much as I don't want to, I think I might have to offer to film this horrible thing, to avoid an actual camera appearance.

Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Youtube Again

While the bunnies were checking out youtube for work related films, they found something truly alarming. It seems that many authors are making videos about their work and posting them on youtube to attract readers. So now the bunnies have decided that they should make a film about those frightening rabbit novels. Can youtube videos be rated dangerous for viewing?

Monday, July 30, 2012

The Pool

Still no sign of the pool repairman. I don't like how the bunnies keep looking suspiciously at me, and then at the phone, though. I think they might be getting the idea in their fluffy heads that I was the only one near the telephone at the times the repairman might have called, and thus most likely to have said something to prevent his showing up. So now they are looking for my leash, and planning a nice, long session in front of the laptop, watching videos on WORK! They have the notion that since I might have done something to run off the repairman then that means I should be forced to labor, fixing the pool myself!

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Cookies

Should you have cookies in your home, I suggest you eat them now while there is still time, for Betsy Bear is on the warpath. The humans bought two packs of cookies on Friday, but upon the opening of these cookies, there was a horrible smell like motor oil, and and even worse taste. Needless to say Betsy, who had been standing by with milk for cookie munching was not pleased at all, especially since these were the only cookies in the house. She's talking about punishing the bakery, but first she intends to hunt down more cookies to munch. Beware should you have cookies! Betsy might be coming after you soon!

Saturday, July 28, 2012

Youtube

I can't believe this, and I will see that home improvement store in court! The humans dropped in there this afternoon on their way back from the vegetable fest, and the person who waited on them gave them the news that he completely redid his house based on info from videos on Youtube. So now the bunnies are camped out, making a movie playlist of work related features to watch! And they expect me to attend this viewing! The home improvement store should be ashamed and so should youtube. This can only lead to the pool being fixed and the cottage being remodeled too, and you know the bunnies will try to put me to work helping!

Friday, July 27, 2012

Vegetable Celebration

I can't believe this. That horrible store, who delighted in selling the bunnies cheap seed, has a vegetable festival scheduled for tomorrow. Needless to say, the bunnies are wanting to hop to it, and horror of horrors, they are wanting me to accompany them! They're trying to coax me into agreeing by offering to go by the fish restaurant down the street afterwards, but still, so much vegetable exposure, is fish worth it? And what if one of the fish place's other feline customers see me?

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Swimming Pool

The swimming pool repairman hasn't showed up for the last two days to finish the job he was hired for, and get the pool into shape for the bunnies and the penguins. Now isn't that just a horrible, horrible shame? Hehehehehehee! That storm actually did me a good turn, taking out the answering machine. Now there is a much greater opportunity to reach the phone before the human on the other end hangs up. Not that the bunnies and penguins can ever prove that I am doing something with the telephone to prevent the repairman from showing up so they can go swimming. Anyway, if they were so worried he might call, why don't they hook up a phone in the human's room where the love to lounge, so they can answer first?

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

More Illustration Woes

The illustration woes are getting worse. Now I must start censoring the internet, I fear. The human learned from a magazine of a place where drawings can be obtained for five dollars each. FIVE DOLLARS! For such a good price, the human would be able to easily afford getting some of those bear books illustrated too. If you have children, I suggest you hide them now. Betsy Bear might be coming soon to a bookshelf near YOU!

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Bunny Book

Does anyone have suggestions for possibly sabotaging the phone, the car and any other things that the human can use to contact that person at church? I just heard her a bit ago, talking about how she needs to check in with them about the rummage sale promotion, and wouldn't it be nice if while she did that, if she checked too, about hiring that person she learned of to provide the cover for the rabbit work. A cover with a rabbit on the front! Have you ever heard of something so frightening? It will have a rabbit and a vegetable on the cover. And the bunnies are sure it will appeal to the farmer's market bunch and the food co-op people too. There must be something I can do to prevent this illustration from taking place!

Monday, July 23, 2012

Second Sunday Horror

The bunnies shared another horror from yesterday with me while they were lounging around awaiting the arrival of the repairman who is to get the pool fixed for their bunny swimming pleasure. Apparently while the human was at Sunday sermon, she got the happy news that the people in the pew in front of her have relations who are artists. So now she thinks she might have a good solid lead on getting that nightmarish rabbit book illustrated. Sniff, sniff, sniff. Really, the church should be ashamed of themselves! The bunnies are horribly encouraged now, and I don't want to think of how they will be acting should this book lead pan out!

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Country Visit

The humans took a little trip to the country today, in the company of three rabbits, to check on the cottage. When they returned. the bunnies were pleased to announce that everything was perfect, and then they started bouncing around chatting with other rabbits about how nice it would be to go up there in a few days, just in time for that nightmarish event honoring the tomato. I know I saw one of them hopping off to get my leash too. I don't want to attend something honoring the tomato! The event always has a cannon on hand for some nutty reason, and Betsy always manages to swipe it. I don't want to be there where I can be declared and accessory to her crimes!

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Beauty Parlor

I barely escaped a trip to the beauty parlor, and a clawacure today. The bunnies located a beauty parlor that serves felines, and they were all fired up to drag me in for a trim, and probably a bath or something torturous like that too. I wouldn't put it past them to want to bathe me. They were lurking with my leash, and I was sure they were going to catch me, but thank goodness, the humans were expecting a repairman, and weren't able to drive the bunnies to the parlor with a captive cat. I fear what they might have planned for Monday, though. My poor claws!

Friday, July 20, 2012

Geese

Does anyone know what sort of living accommodations geese like? I just learned that a flock of these birds are living down by the creek only a couple of blocks away. That creek is on public land, and I don't think it is very fair for the city to collect money for renting to the geese, when there is a perfectly nice feline in the bird dwelling business so close by. What can I do to make my property more attractive to the geese? We've got a swimming pool with a diving board here. Don't you think they would like that much more than the boring creek?

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Smoke Update

The kitchen is still smoky and the human's allergies are still troubling her. And I am getting worried. The bunnies are still lurking in the human's room, after snoozing there all day, and when I passed by a bit ago, and pressed my pointy ear to the space beneath the door, while pretending to sharpen my claws on the carpet, I know I heard them discussing fleeing to the smoke free country! What in the world am I going to do if they do decide to take a little trip? I know they'll try dragging me along! And if the human's sinuses feel better up there, who knows how long I might be trapped!