Thursday, April 30, 2009

Bunny Content Blocker

Does anyone know how to get a content blocker for the computer that will keep the bunnies from accessing sites like that gardening board that keeps giving them the worst ideas possible? I've found plenty of programs to block x-rated stuff for kids, but nothing that provides appropriate protection for rabbits. The food co-op has a frightening selection of loose herbs, and the bunnies are looking some of those up now to see which might be easy to start from the loose mix, so I need a good blocker fast.


Okay, the soybean news isn't as promising. Wikipedia says that some varieties can reach 2.5 meters. Isn't that well over six feet? And I'll bet the bunnies have 50+ seeds in their little bags too! What am I going to do if they have the aggressive, big version of the soybean plant? Are there any charges the neighbors can file against the food co-op for letting the bunnies get their paws on soybeans?

The Adzuki Bean

I looked up the adzuki bean on wikipedia. It didn't say anything about potential aggressive tendencies with the bean, and surely it would mention that, wouldn't it, especially if the bean might be to blame for the disappearance of various felines or teenagers celebrating a graduation?

Bean Sprouts

Some of the bean sprouts moved to a bowl just a bit ago, and the bunnies promptly replaced them with some of the mixed beans they got at the store. I don't know what I'm going to do if those things start to sprout, I really don't. It should be illegal to sell a pound of ANYTHING to a bunny, but especially to sell them a pound of seed. My only comfort is that I don't believe beans are as aggressive as the other seed the bunnies have, and might possibly not capture the innocent, neighboring kitties, or cause the neighbor's grandson or some of his friends to vanish forever into their viney depths. Or are they safe? I think I better look up the new beans fast!

Boy Bunny Revisited

I am more sure than ever that the latest bunny to hop in here is a guy rabbit. A batch of them were on the table inspecting seeds after their trip to the store, and I got a good look up his rump. I'm sure he's a boy bunny, and what in the world am I going to do about it? Every other rabbit in here is FEMALE!


More zucchini moved into bowls this evening, I would guess potentially 40+ seedlings. The bunnies promptly put the beans they got today in the baggie, along with a different kind of watermelon, more cucumbers and a handful of beans from a bag of mixed beans they got at the grocery store. Would you believe the store had the nerve to sell them a pound of beans? We are never going to see the yard again, and I suspect the neighbors will start vanishing before long.

Food Co-op

The local food co-op should be so ashamed of themselves this evening! The rabbits just hopped down there and they had so many reasonably priced things in the bean family, it wasn't funny. They were out of popcorn, but the bunnies got soy beans, chickpeas, black beans and adzuki beans. Do you know how many of those things a rabbit can get for a dime? The bunnies are hoping to hop back in a few days to stock up on more stuff as soon as they hear the popcorn is replenished. Really, such encouragement of rabbit gardening should be illegal!


The bunnies just found a post on a message board saying that popcorn can be grown straight from store bought bags! I think they're going to look for some this afternoon! Do you know how many popcorn seeds come in the average bag? How can I block that message board before they encourage the bunnies further? I don't like the post they saw on beans either.

This Afternoon's Seed Report

More cucumbers and yellow squash have moved from a baggie into little bowls. I'm thinking of ordering condolence cards for our neighbors now, to express my sympathy on the upcoming takeover of their houses by the bunnies' garden. Do they sell sympathy cards for such traumatic occasions, do you suppose? Perhaps they have them at the seed store. Anyway, the bunnies poked another pack of corn, some flower called lobella and thirty pumpkin seeds into the bag along with some cucumbers that weren't ready to move. This really, really isn't looking good at all. And they're plotting to go out later when the human has to go to the doctor! They're going to hop in the car and stow away! And, horror or horrors, the doctor's office is near several stores who sell SEED!

Stopping Bunnies

One of the books the bunnies have liberated from the library says that one inch wiring like chicken wire is supposed to keep bunnies out of stuff. Guess whoever wrote the book has never met my siblings and their baby bunnies. One of the babies was measuring herself yesterday, and she's totally sure she could squeeze through a one inch gap with no problem. Not to mention, wiring would kind of defeat the purpose of a book drop at the library in the first place. Really, I don't know why they even bother keeping gardening books in stock there given the bunnies' presence.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Okay, I'm Very Alarmed

Okay, I'm really alarmed now. That big freezer bag that the bunnies filled less that a week ago? Do people remember that? Well, the stuff they poked in is SPROUTING! There are currently fifteen or so watermelons, and I don't even want to imagine the pumpkins. The morning glories are sprouting as well. I'm afraid to check anything else. Honestly, I don't know what I'm going to do, given the extent of the bunnies' seeding. What sort of obligation do I have to warn our poor, misfortunate neighbors of their fast approaching doom?

Gardening Message Boards

I wonder if I need to post something on the bunnies' gardening message boards. Betsy has taken to reading it, and has unfortunately seen several posts about bees needing to be relocated. Should the poor people who have these bees be warned that the mob might show up at their house soon or something? I'm sure they weren't even thinking about bear mobsters when they posted their bee issues.


The watermelon escaped to a bowl just a bit ago. Honestly, that makes two bowls full of it so far, and as I said before, those things can take over 100 square feet per plant! I swear I saw the seedlings leaning their leaves suspiciously towards the neighbor's house, too. Anyway, the bunnies added San Marzano tomatoes to the bag as soon as the watermelon was gone. It was a small bag, and that was all they could poke in with the pumpkin seed already living there.

More Plant Moving

Some buttercup squash have moved now as well, and the bunnies added watermelon, twenty pumpkin seeds, yellow straightneck squash, beefsteak tomatoes and forget-me-nots as soon as they were out of the bag. Food has been purchased for these plants as well, which is more than a bit alarming. Who knows how much more they will grow if they get three meals a day? Our neighbors might as well flee for their lives now, and I just know my cat mother who dwells next door is going to be stuck living on the roof of her house before this is over!

Speaking of the Cucumbers' Move

As soon as the cucumbers moved into their bowls, the bunnies poked more seed in the empty spaces. They've got a paw-full of turkey beans, corn, table queen squash, wax beans, chervil and more cucumbers, along with some flowers; morning glory and zinnias. How alarmed do you suppose I should be? I saw them hopping about a bit ago too, possibly planning an escape for more seed shopping.

May Jail Resevation

I have a jail reservation, thank goodness! Would you believe that our poor, misfortunate neighbors have a grandson who will be graduating in May, and I just know they're going to throw a party for him. Thank goodness I will be safely tucked away in jail, and far from this place during the possible festivities is all that I can say. The bunnies moved over another baggie of cucumbers today, and there must have been 60+ of those little things. I just know that should there be a party, one or more teenagers will be caught, and possibly lost forever, due to the bunnies' gardening. At least I won't be here to potentially be held responsible, though. Jail, here I come!

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Speaking of Today's Seed

Would you believe that some foolish store actually sold the bunnies carrot seed? SIX packs of it, too! Doesn't selling that much seed to a bunny count as contributing to rabbit delinquency or something? How can I report them for such a serious breach of all that is sane? I don't even want to think of the radish seed they supplied the bunnies as well, or the beans. I'm sure the flowers they got pose some sort of danger as well.


All I can suggest if you are planning to visit my area any time soon is to give up such a crazy notion now, and should you be so misfortunate as to actually live around here, well, all I can say is to run for your lives right away. Some of the zucchini, more pumpkins, cucumbers and some of the buttercup squash upgraded their living space today, moving in to the little bowls. The bunnies promptly put in more pumpkin seed, peas, wax beans, two packs of super marmande tomatoes, and a pack of carrots into the little bags to replace what they moved. Honestly, we are never going to see our neighbors again at the rate at which the bunnies are planting.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Horrid Seed Spotted!

Would you believe some foolish, foolish person is selling eucalyptus seed on Amazon? Does anyone know how I can block this page at once? I have koala siblings, and goodness knows what will result should they find such a dangerous batch of seed!


The grandhuman did something spectacularly foolish, and may I say right now that I am in no way, shape or form to blame for it? Would you believe that she actually got a pepper, and left it unattended with all of the little seeds showing? Needless to say, the bunnies attacked it, and now there are I would guess fifty+ pepper seeds tucked into their bags for starting. And they didn't even get all of the seeds out either! What in the world will I do if they all sprout?


A groundhog has been spotted wandering about the area, and I can only assume he's a relative of my groundhog brother and sister, Gregory and Gianne Groundhog. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how I can prevent a new guest? The fence won't work since I've learned that groundhogs can scramble over them despite what some books might have you believe and goodness knows if I don't watch the door every minute, my siblings will just throw it open for him. I really hope his paws don't get tired, too, so he has to wave down a cab. It's always such a pain and I'm sure he'll expect the residents here to pay his fare too!


Should I suggest my neighboring cat friends get their pawprints taken right away? I've been doing some more looking at the bunnies' horrifying garden plans and I'm very concerned that my fellow felines might all be going missing soon, lost in a sea of vining plants. Perhaps pawprinting would help the police to find them.

The bunnies moved some of the zucchini to the little bowls this afternoon, and they're currently taking up three of them for a guestiment of sixty seedlings. And of course, no sooner did they move the zucchini seeds out than they popped in packs of more zucchini, sugar peas, onions and 20+ pumpkin seeds. I wonder if our neighbors have insurance? Did you know squash can send out twenty foot long vines? And watermelon can take up 100 square feet?

Seed Moving

Some of the pumpkins and watermelons have upgraded from bags to those little bowls with the lids. Honestly, the pumpkins were so fat and plump already as seedlings that I don't even want to think of how big they will be soon. And it's only been a bit over a week since they started too! Of course, the bunnies couldn't leave the bag space they vacated empty either. They've added: two packs of corn. another pack of eggplant, another pack of kohlrabi, more peas, twenty more pumpkin seed, dill, chives, oregano and peppermint. Does peppermint really grow as fast as I've heard, because I believe the bunnies had several hundred seeds there. Really, the stores should be so ashamed to sell to those rabbits.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Mystery Seed Identified?

The bunnies believe that they have finally identified the mystery seed they found and poked into the bags for starting. After some thinking and checking it out when it sprouted, they think it's egg gourd seed. Can my luck get any worse? About the only size bird who would be interested in renting one of those gourds would be a hummingbird, and I'm not too sure about them. Why couldn't they find some seed for a decent sized rental property instead?


The bunnies are bugging me to get offline so they can go hat shopping. They claim they all must have little hats to wear for gardening, and this headgear must be purchased immediately. Have you ever heard of such before? And of course they need hats with ear holes in them which I imagine won't be easy to find given those rabbits' ear sizes. Does anyone know how I can convince them to go looking for something else instead?

Stopping Shopping

Does anyone have any suggestions for how I can stop the bunnies from hopping off to shop and expand their seed holdings? I tried sending out their pictures to all of the stores with a note not to sell to them, but would you believe that they say that they can't refuse, that it would be species discrimination or something? So, what can I do to stop them? So many places around here foolishly sell cheap seed too. Perhaps I could figure a way to switch their change for Chucky Cheese tokens?

Saturday, April 25, 2009

The Expanding Danger of Seeds

The yellow squash have upgraded their accommodations. All of the little sprouts were transferred into these little plastic salad bowls, filled with dirt and then covered with clear lids to make them like mini-greenhouses. They're currently filling five little bowls, which I just know is a terrible sign of things to come. And to make matters worse, the second they moved out of their bag, the bunnies poked it full of MORE seed! They've got in: zucchini, Swiss chard, what looks like a jumbo pack of that, two different kinds of cantaloupe, cherry tomatoes and rutgers tomatoes. I swear I sent a warning out to all of the stores, to tell them not to sell stuff to the rabbits anymore, but they claim it would be discrimination to deny them. I think they must have money invested in a hotel somewhere and just want our neighbors to be forced to flee their homes.


They were having some sort of festival uptown today, and would you believe that someone was foolish enough to bring baskets full of fleece to it? What they were thinking, I'll never know, doing something so crazy like that in the same area as my fleece loving polar bear sisters. Of course, I suppose if they do amuse themselves making off with that fleece, it might convince them to leave Shelia Sheep and her lamb alone. I would think snitching the spinning guild blind would be so much easier than trying to hold a sheep down long enough to give them a haircut, what with the hooves and the frantic baaing and all.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Sprouting update

The tomatoes are sprouting. Granted, it's just one or two of the little things right now, but I can guarantee that that's the worst possible sign. More are sure to follow shortly, I just know it. All of the watermelon is sprouting too, and the spinach is looking very suspicious. I don't even want to think about the okra. And would you believe that the rabbits hopped home with MORE seed today? I hope the neighbors don't mind having to flee on short notice.

The Poor Cows

The cows are going to be in so much trouble shortly, and it is all the bunnies' fault! It turns out that the cows are supposed to be saving all of that manure to bag and sell in order to make ends meet. Unfortunately, three bunnies went hopping up there today, and I'm sure they didn't pay for anything they collected. Heaven only knows how the cows will explain what happened to the farmer when he comes out and all of the manure is gone. How much trouble do you suppose they'll be in for just giving it away to a batch of rabbits?


The cucumbers are up to something. I've actually been able to see two of them growing in their little bags, and they're rapidly expanding, actually growing in front of my eyes! What am I going to do? If they keep it up, they'll be able to escape their bags and then what will happen if they get loose in the house?

Thursday, April 23, 2009

35 Bags of Seed

The bunnies added another bag of seed, which wouldn't seem frightening, but this bag is a FREEZER bag! Here's what they've got in it: Roma tomatoes, zucchini, not a value pack, but certainly big enough that it should have been labeled value, sugar peas, a value pack of Ace 55 tomatoes, more broccoli and a frightening number of pumpkin seed. They also put in some flowers: gypsophila, morning glory and more larkspur, and in a miracle, I convinced them to put in a pack of my catnip! Now, do you think that the reading I've been doing online has been exaggerating a bit about the ability of catnip to spread? It did seem to be a rather large pack.

More Alarming Seed Developments

More alarming seed developments here. The sweet basil is sprouting, along with the kohlrabi, and the fennel is looking highly suspicious to me. I don't even want to think about the beans. I knew that one bean seed that sprouted would lead to more alarming growth! Does anyone have any suggestions about how I can work out the average speed of the squash or zucchini vine in comparison to the average speed of a feline? I have some friends around here who I'm rather concerned about, thinking about their chances of escaping the bunnies' plants. And they're trying to work out more seed to start too! They brought home little, lidded salad bowls today to fill with dirt and transfer seedlings to! Then they can reuse the baggies to start more seed!

Seed Starting in a Bag

Might I suggest that no one ever tries this method? I just did a little calculating, and it's only been six days since the bunnies started this method, even less for some of the seed they've got out, and sprouting is going on like crazy!


HELP! HELP! The yellow squash are sprouting and I mean all of the yellow squash are sprouting! Someone help, quickly! And I just doublechecked, and the cucumbers and buttercup squash are sprouting as well! What do I do? The bunnies currently have out what I am sure are hundreds of those seeds! Should I go ahead and warn the neighbors to flee their homes now or what? The pumpkin seeds are starting to sprout now too! And the zucchini! What do I do? And the broccoli!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

No New Seed News Today

The human had to frost a cake today, so the bunnies' ability to up their seed count was limited, thank goodness! Unfortunately, they're hopping mad about that, and are making plans to make up for any seeding time they lost today tomorrow. And in even worse news, they might be amusing themselves hopping down to a store that carries cheaply priced SEED! How concerned do you think I should be? I saw them gathering their funds a bit ago.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Today's Seed Report

More been seeds look like they might be sprouting, and I just know the cucumbers and zucchini are going to be next. The bunnies are up to thirty-four little baggies full of stuff nestled in paper towels and coffee filters. I hope no one wanted coffee around here. Or needed a paper towel to wipe up a spill. Here's what they put out today: Lima beans, a value pack full of them, another pack of early jalapeno peppers, Brussels sprouts, beets, radishes and cilantro. Do you think the neighbors can in any way blame me should they be forced to evacuate their houses due to the bunnies' expanding garden?

Monday, April 20, 2009

I Spoke Too Soon

I spoke too soon about the thirty baggies. There are now thirty-one. The bunnies just filled another baggie with three packs of something called cowpeas. I suppose they must have been out of bunnypeas or something. I wonder how attached the neighbors are to their yards and actually being able to view them before November?

First Sprout!

A bean seed appears to be spouting. The bunnies were switching some of the seeds today, since they heard that coffee filters really worked better for seedlings, and they found that a bean seed has what seems to be the start of a sprout. I just know that bean sprout will give the zucchini and cucumbers bad ideas about starting to sprout next. Can I be blamed if the bunnies' garden takes over the neighbors' yards for three houses on all sides? They got more seed today too, and are now up to thirty little baggies. They added today: jalapeno peppers, both early and regular, ruby lettuce, iceburg lettuce, beefsteak tomatoes, homestead tomatoes, grand bell peppers, sweet banana peppers, and Hungarian hot yellow wax peppers. They also put out some flower seed; cosmos, shasta daisies and larkspurs. Heaven only knows what they're planning to do with those.

New Rabbit

I am highly suspicious of the new rabbit that came hopping into the house now. I could swear that I heard my bunny sisters calling that rabbit by the name of PETER! I think the bunny must be a boy bunny! Of course, my sisters claim they were just telling the new rabbit about their illustrious ancestor, Peter Rabbit, but I'm not sure that I believe them. I think they're just trying to hide this bunny's sex from me. The bunny doesn't have earbows on, and although it is wearing a bow around its neck, many guys do that too i.e. bowties. I just know that bunny is a guy! Every other rabbit in the house is female! Does anyone know how to arrange a rabbit neutering fast before disaster strikes?

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Birdhouse Gourd

The bunnies found a seed packet with birdhouse gourd! They've currently got ten seeds nestled in a little baggie along with another pack of Kohlrabi, and they tell me if these seem to work well, they'll be happy to fix more gourd seed for me. Perhaps their seed obsession isn't so bad after all? So, does anyone have any suggestions as to how much I can charge in rent for a gourd? Surely there are a lot of birds who would love to move into such a unique house.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Again with the Seed

There's more seed out this evening. The bunnies are up to 26 baggies full. Here's what they've added: sweet basil, four more packs of various cucumber, another pack of pepper, two packs of butternut squash, another pack of rutgers tomatoes, two more packs of zucchini, not the value packs this time, thank goodness, but still very big, two more packs of yellow squash, fennel and sage. I'm a bit concerned about the addition of these herbs. I think they're part of a plot to get my herbivore dino sisters to help with gardening.

I Have Never Been So Embarrassed

I have never been so embarrassed in my little kitty life. The bunnies split up today. A batch of them stayed here to supervise their seed, while they sent Polly Bunny to scout out the country cottage and our poor cousin Farmer Turley's tomato farm. There are the nicest herd of cows who live just down the road, perfect for placing orders for milk with. You won't believe what that bunny did, though! She stopped by and asked them about their manure, and if they were producing plenty and it's possible nutritional content for gardening purposes! I am never going to be able to show my face again with those cows after what that bunny asked them!

Of course, Betsy ran wild too. The poor picnickers were out in full force since it was such a nice day, happily enjoying lunches and boating on the lake. At least they were until that bear popped up. Poor picnickers. Not a sandwich was left, and I shudder to think what happened to all of those poor boaters she got. Really, our neighbors should be so ashamed of their failures as boat owners, leaving their boat unguarded for that bear to take off in the second the humans turn their back! And to make matters worse, they're thinking of going back to the country tomorrow, which means I still might be caught and drug up there!

Spoke too Soon

I spoke too soon. The bunnies just added baggie number twenty, with two packs of Cherokee Wax Bush Beans, and a hundred half-runner beans. You know, this method they're trying with their seeds is supposed to have an alarming success rate. How worried do you suppose I should be about that? Here's a shot of the seed packets the bunnies have used so far.

Frightening, isn't it?

Seed Update

There are now nineteen little baggies full of seed. The bunnies went in to improve their technique for covering the eggplant, and they decided to add a few things. They've added so far: cherry tomatoes, more pepper and broccoli, two packs of peas, and two of okra. How alarmed by their seeds should I be? Some of these things have an alarming tendency to say HEAVY PRODUCER on the pack.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Hmmm, Seed Question

Okay, I just did a quick check of the browser's Amazon history to prepare myself for any rabbit purchases. (I knew those library books would give them bad ideas.) Anyway, I found a type of gourd that is supposed to make excellent bird houses. Has anyone ever tried this type of plant? My business would increase so much faster if I could GROW dwellings for rent!


I think that I'm in trouble. The bunnies started some of their seeds today, on wet paper towels in little snack bags. They have currently filled seventeen bags worth and they're nagging me to get off the computer so they can look up more things to start in their little bags. I really, really think I am in trouble here. Here's what they've got in their little bags so far: yellow squash, two packs of buttercup squash, table queen squash which frankly looks like another type of buttercup to me, two packs of cabbage, spinach, lettuce, kohlrabi, broccoli, cantaloupe, eggplant, cauliflower, Rutgers tomatoes, two different kinds of cucumbers, the big, value pack of zucchini, more pumpkin seed than I care to think about, watermelon, peppers and some sort of strange seed that wasn't labeled but they suspect of being in the squash or gourd family. So, how worried do you think I should be? They've read that this method allows for very fast seed sprouting, so you can get more batches started faster. And does zucchini really spread like I've heard it does? The batch the bunnies have is labeled a heavy producer, and there really were a lot of seeds in the bag.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

The Weekend

Well, I'm in trouble no matter what I do this weekend, unless I work out a way to book myself a jail cell. I believe I spotted those rabbits sneaking out this morning while the human was still snoozing, and I have a bad feeling about the library book display. Can prints be lifted from bunny paw marks, do you think? I saw someone had visited a page online all about rappelling earlier, so I think the bunnies learned the best way to lower the baby rabbits down the book deposit chute to retrieve the display books. I'm anticipating much exploding and loudness from the librarians when they find the damage, so it would be nice to be safely away. The only problem is, that if I go to the country cottage, Betsy Bear has several crimes planned. There's a picnic area just down from it, and like that cousin of hers, I'm sure she's planning to collect all of those baskets, as if what she got from the poor Easter Bunny wasn't bad enough. Not to mention, our poor cousin, Farmer Turley. The bunnies treated his farm as a salad bar last year so goodness knows what he will do if he hears of them hopping his way. Does anyone have any ideas as to how I can book a jail cell on short notice?

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

I'm Doomed

Well, I'm afraid that I'm so doomed, it isn't funny. The human just got off of the phone with a place that seems like they have lots of reasonably priced genealogical materials. And unfortunately, this place is right near the country cottage, too, so I have a bad feeling as to where I am going to be spending my weekend. Can I be taken as an accessory to Betsy's crimes if I'm trapped in the same cottage as her? Of course, on the up side, a visit to the country will get me out of the range of the librarians. The bunnies are planning to drop in while the library's closed on Thursday and Friday to collect all of those gardening and veggie books, so I can just imagine the screams now when they open on Saturday to find their display gone. So, which do you suppose is more dangerous, Betsy and her crimes or the bunnies' book collecting?

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

New Bunny

A new rabbit came hopping in today, and frankly, I am very suspicious of this bunny. The rabbit won't supply a name, and I'm very suspicious it's because this bunny is a boy! Every other rabbit in the house is female, so you can imagine the disaster a boy bunny creeping in here would be. Does anyone have any suggestions for how to tell rabbit genders? This one isn't wearing earbows, which is usually what signifies a female rabbit.

Monday, April 13, 2009

The Librarians have Lost It

Well, the librarians have obviously lost their minds, probably as a result of having to process some of my human's stranger book orders. They have actually put together a display case filled with books about gardening and various vegetables! They are roughly two blocks away from our house, which is barely a decent hop for my bunny sisters. I wonder if I should call the funny farm on those librarians right now. It would really save them some suffering later. I saw the bunnies hopping about, dragging out sacks for books, and they were measuring the baby bunnies. I think they're planning to lower them in through the book drop so they can pass the display books out that way. I am missing a ball of yarn that I suspect was snitched for lowering purposes. Poor, poor librarians. They're going to come in and find their entire display that they worked so hard on gone. Of course, I suppose it DOES serve them right for making such a foolish thing so close to bunnies. What in the world WERE they thinking?

Sunday, April 12, 2009

My Human is Insane!

The human has totally lost it is all that I can say. She actually adopted a sheep and her lamb from that sheep adoption project for Easter! My new sheep sister answers to the name of Shelia Sheep, and she's currently hiding in the den with her lamb, trying to keep out of the reach of the polar bears. I'm afraid I saw them searching for the scissors, though, so I'm more than a bit worried. Any guesses as to how long it will be before the poor sheep is sheered? She is rather fluffy and fleecy, after all.

The Easter Bunny, Alias Peter Cottontail

May I offer my sincere apologies to anyone who was missing an Easter Basket this morning? I'm afraid all of those traps Betsy laid along The Bunny Trail worked perfectly, and she came trotting home with paws full of captured baskets. I gave up counting after a hundred, so who knows how many she managed to snag? She's currently amusing herself munching down every chocolate egg in the lot and chuckling about her success. I just hope it occurred to her to free that poor bunny after she robbed him of all of his goodies.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Wool Gathering

I would hate to be a sheep, is all that I can say. The polar bears went out to the sheep adoption center this afternoon, and I'm afraid they were chuckling rather badly when they returned. Apparently Nanna served as a distraction for the sheep's human caretakers while the cubs went after the wool. Are naked sheep still adoptable, do you think? I believe I saw the polar bears with some suspicious tufts of white.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Traffic Hazards on The Bunny Trail

All pedestrian traffic should avoid taking The Bunny Trail for the next few days. Betsy Bear has installed a series of bunny snares there, in her plot to capture the Easter Bunny, alias Peter Cottontail. I saw her with a shovel too, so I'm thinking at least one pit trap might have been put into place. Can she be charged with that, obstructing the free flow of traffic on a public roadway? And as if her traps and snares aren't bad enough, she put out bunny snacks too, as bait, to make sure that poor, poor rabbit stumbles into her clutches. I really hope no children were counting on the bunny visiting with those baskets. With the road hazards he has to face right now, he would be safer hopping across the Indianapolis 500.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Dear Sheep

Sheep, I understand my polar bear sisters dropped in on you today, and may I say that I'm very sorry if any of you lost any wool. I think I better warn you now that they might be coming back tomorrow, and I spotted them a bit ago collecting sacks, possibly for the purpose of holding wool. You sheep best act now to protect yourselves, is all that I can say, and the only method I can see is for you to felt yourselves immediately. It's really simple. First get a tub of water. Warm is preferable, but if cold's all you have, it will have to do. Put in some detergent, or soap snitched from the restroom dispensers if necessary. Then hop in, and agitate yourselves for several minutes until you're all nicely felted. Hopefully that will be enough to save you.

The Sheep Meet Their Fate?

The polar bears got out of the house today, and caught a ride down to the sheep adoption center. While no official reports of wool snitching have reached me yet, my sisters and the cubs were making lots of suspicious comments about how woolly and warm those sheep were when they got back. Do you think I need to start a search for purloined bags of wool? And I can't be held accountable for those poor sheep becoming nudists if my sisters did get them, right?

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Warm Weather, Please

I so hope the weather cooperates and warms up soon. Not only do cold snaps make my polar bear sisters run about panicking and plotting to snag quilts and blankets, but now the bunnies are getting into the act and complaining that this cold is terribly delaying their planned start for the gardening season. At least Betsy Bear isn't complaining, which is about the only good thing. Apparently crime doesn't stop for cold snaps so she has no problem with the weather. I don't know what I'm going to do about the bunnies and the polar bears, though. I really don't.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Saving the Sheep

I think I've came up with a way to save those poor, innocent sheep and not a moment too soon, either, as we've had snow today. I checked the quilt books when the polar bears weren't looking, and there's something that can be done with wool called felting that I believe will render it useless for the polar bears' purposes. Now I just have to figure out how to convince all of the sheep to felt themselves at once. Do you think if I mail them the instructions on felting wool and a large box of detergent, that will be enough?

Monday, April 6, 2009

Polar Bears vs. Rain

On the up side for those poor, unfortunate sheep, it's raining. My polar bear sisters consider rain just one step up from snow, and look at it like it's possibly plotting to become snow at any moment just to freeze their fur off, so they're very reluctant to get out in it. On the down side, though, there is the worry that this rain might actually become snow, and my sisters are desperate for more quilts to hide under, so that might overcome their reluctance to get out in the rain. I'm afraid I saw one of them looking for rain gear and an umbrella, so it looks like they're thinking of risking it to get to the bus stop and then on down to the location where those poor sheep are awaiting adoption. I just hope the sheep aren't terribly attached to all of that fluffy, fluffy wool.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Flock of Sheep

Oh, I have horrible news! There is a very foolish place sponsoring a sheep adoption project. Sixteen dollars for a grown sheep, five for a baby. These poor sheep have the misfortune to have nice, long, thick, warm wool, too. And in their second misfortune, the place where they're gathered is right on a bus line, and we conveniently live just down the street from a bus stop. Do buses let polar bears on them? I'm afraid that my sisters have been checking the schedule for bus departure times, and I just saw the cubs pulling out the good scissors. Do you think the poor sheep will still be adoptable after my siblings have snagged every last tuft of their wool?

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Another Betsy Bear Danger

Betsy is plotting against someone besides the bees, too. Next weekend this creature called the Easter Bunny, alias Peter Cottontail, will be coming hopping down some avenue called The Bunny Trail with paws filled with baskets full of candy and goodies for children all over. He's even supplied me before, so I suppose I can't complain about this rabbit too much. The bad news for him, though, is that Betsy is plotting to snag him and all of those baskets. I've seen her checking Mapquest for directions to this Bunny Trail, and she's got a sack full of bunny snares too, to catch the rabbit as soon as one of his big feet hops into it. Is there any way I can warn this poor bunny of his impending doom? Perhaps he can find some sort of alternate route to use instead.

The Poor, Misfortunate Bees

Betsy Bear went to the countryside today, and you will not believe what happened. A group of bees had dropped by the crab apple tree up at our country cottage. I suppose they thought it was too early in the season, and so they would be safe from Betsy Bear. Needless to say, they were wrong, and she took the poor things for ALL of their honey. Here's a shot of the tree. Doesn't it look nice?

The poor bees were so happy, buzzing around it, gathering their little collections of nectar, and then Betsy pounced. I hope their hive has insurance.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Weather Man

Really, I must contact the sheep at once and tell them that they should blame the weather man for their impending nudity. That silly person just gave a forecast calling for freezing temperatures, and as you can imagine, my polar bear sisters are totally panicked. Those poor, poor sheep. They're not going to have a bit of wool left once the polar bears get through with them. Those quilt books told that besides providing batting, sheep can also provide yarn for polar bear scarves and mittens. My sisters have knitting needles, and I don't think they're afraid to use them. Those sheep are totally doomed!


The rabbits are looking up plans for the construction of large planters to increase garden space. How alarming do you suppose that should be? I've already seen them hopping about in the back yard and in the side lot with little balls of string and sticks, trying to mark out where they want everything in their garden. How much more space could they possibly need?

Found the Seed

The missing catnip seed has turned up. Apparently those bunnies returned it at a different store than the one where it was purchased. This second store just happens to be right by the topsoil and plant store, too, so I know it was a rabbit that was to blame for sure. The human was able to snag five more packs of seed, bringing me up to nine packs of catnip seed total. Does that seem like a nice start for a farm?

Thursday, April 2, 2009

More Seed Issues

The rabbits just did a count of their seed supply, and they have almost 40 packets of tomato seed alone. How alarmed do you suppose I should be over that? I could swear I saw a couple of sets of large, floppy ears outside too, hopping down the street in the direction of the store and the seed display. I think some bunnies might have escaped to go shopping!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009


The bunnies who accidentally purchased the catnip seeds are refusing to return them. The seed display is still totally without catnip thanks to those rotten rabbits. What in the world am I going to do? Four packs of seed is nowhere near enough to start a farm! How can I get the seed back that those bunnies accidentally purchased? Honesty, they're rabbits! Catnip is for CATS, not bunnies! They should return it post haste so my farming can get back on track!