Sunday, March 31, 2013

Leader's Visit

At least our leader was understanding when he hopped around today. We were so sure he would be upset with us, over our total failure to capture that cat, but he didn't punish us, and allowed us a sack of seed. He said he would be back soon, though, and he expects to see a cat here when he returns. So Brother's recapture must be sped up accordingly. We don't know what our leader will do if that cat evades us much longer.

Friday, March 29, 2013

Head Bunny

Just a few more hours until the head bunny comes hopping around. We don't know how we're going to explain to him that brother isn't here yet. Despite our efforts, that cat has totally eluded us, and avoided recapture for over two months. It's so embarrassing. We were sure we would have him back before the Head Bunny hopped around and he's still on the loose. He probably pulled this little trick, and is hiding, just to make us look bad to our leader. When the Head Bunny finds out that we have failed at something that should be simple like capturing brother, he will be so disappointed. And what if he takes back our gifts of SEED?

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Car

We're looking at taking the car to visit the head bear, and really, brother will be very sorry if we are forced into that. On the bus, he could have had a seat of his own, or shared with our hopeful new kitty sibling. But if we are forced to take the car, well, he'll be sharing with US! We can see it now, brother crammed into a seatbelt with multiple bears, and the car doesn't offer bathroom facilities like the bus, we hope he knows, so he will be forced to cross his paws and wait! He will be so sorry for trying to sabotage our trip, that is for sure. Just wait!

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Terrible News

Our planned trip to visit the head bear has met with disaster. There's been an issue with the bus, and so it looks like our trip to visit the head bear isn't going to happen. Our poor human spent the afternoon in tears, and we know we heard a kitty laughing somewhere. Really, brother ought to be ashamed of himself, gloating about the failure of our trip. It was to his benefit for this to happen too, we hope he knows. If the head bear liked our human, she might have hired her to write bear stuff, which would have provided more money for KITTY stuff! Brother never thinks things through.

Monday, March 25, 2013

Snow Started

The snow started a bit ago, and we are sure there is already an inch out there. The polar bears are in a tizzy, and our poor groundhog brother and sister are considering going into hiding. They're sure the polar bears hold them to blame for the snow, and are plotting to drag them and any groundhog they can find to court for causing it. Really, we blame the weatherman for this, though. He called for a DUSTING of snow! An inch is not a dusting! He obviously failed math.

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Thank Goodness

Thank goodness we bought that piece of fleece yesterday, and now we're wishing we had purchased more. The weather forecast is calling for snow and the polar bears are in a panic, demanding warm clothing and blankets right away. They're looking suspiciously at the groundhogs too, and we think we heard them muttering a bit ago about checking, to see if they could join the state of Ohio in taking the groundhog to court for the continuing winter weather. Can they do that?

Saturday, March 23, 2013

More Screams

We got some more fabric today, while our human was shopping for her new glasses. Oh, there were so many lovely sales on it. We were able to gather yards and yards for the construction of new outfits, including material for construction of fleecy clothing for the polar bears. We kept hearing screams with each snip of the scissors. Really, Brother ought to behave himself. It's a wonder that our fabric didn't end up horribly miscut due to him distracting the clerk with his shouting.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Groundhog Troubles

We have just learned that the state of Ohio is trying to take a groundhog to court over their failure to accurately predict the weather and the continuing absence of spring. Now our groundhog siblings are in a panic over this, sure that widespread persecution of the groundhog is nigh. They're making plans to open up a refuge in the poolhouse for poor, innocent persecuted groundhogs to flee to in order to escape the law. Really, we don't know what those people are thinking, going after the groundhogs. Why don't they go after the humans who forecast the weather instead? At least the groundhogs don't gloat nearly as much about various predictions as them.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Head Bunny's Coming

The head bunny will be hopping by in a little over a week and our pesky brother still isn't back! How annoying! If he doesn't get his pointy ears back here soon, we're going to have to explain to our leader how he escaped, which will be more than a bit embarrassing. Really, it's been two months, and we haven't been able to recapture him. We'll be totally humiliated if our leader ever learns that cat has dodged us for so long. He's probably laughing about it now, and the trouble he is going to cause us.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Book

Oh, you should have HEARD the screams a bit ago. We were checking the library ebook site, and we found

THIS

book. A book all about how to outsmart cats and make them do what you want. A truly wonderful volume if ever there was one. Our brother, wherever he is hiding, started screaming the second we clicked on it. Heheheheeheheheheheheheehe. Perhaps if we threaten to borrow it, he'll come racing back here to block the internet before it can download!

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Poor Mountain Bears

Those poor mountain bears. Some of them lost their dens a few days ago due to a fire. Frankly, we're not sure if we should be suspicious of the timing or not. Betsy went to the quilt show with all of us on Saturday, and we suspect she popped to a few dens while we were gathering fabric. But we don't think the fire started until Sunday, and we know Betsy was stuffing herself with pizza then. With a day's delay, she couldn't be held to blame for burning the bears' homes down, right? She did tamper with their clocks, turning them from Half past April to a quarter after May, but they're the wind-up kind, so there's no fire danger there.

Monday, March 18, 2013

Just Occurred to Us

It just occurred to us that there are a number of kitties who live at the pizza place where our human was crippled oh so many years ago, and we suspect several of them might be black cats. Now, we're not prejudiced against ebony colored felines, but the fact is that some cats of that color do delight in causing bad luck. What if that's what led to our poor human's injury? If we find out it is their fault, do you think it's too late to take the cats to court? Really, listening to the human moaning in pain is rather awful, and those cats shouldn't get away with causing such terrible luck. We don't know why the good black cats haven't done something about them.

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Packing

We've got to get serious about planning our packing. It will be time to head off to see the head bear before you know it, and we're not entirely sure of what to take. Having to stuff clothing for 752 of us into suitcases is going to be a complicated job, that's for sure, and to make things more difficult, the polar bears are wanting to pack all of their blankets. And material for constructing quilts in case the blankets prove inadequate. Maybe we ought to ask the head bunny to bring more suitcases when he comes hopping down the Bunny Trail in a few weeks. We think we're going to need them. And we haven't figured out what to pack for Brother!

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Quilt Show Report

We had a lovely time at the quilt show today, but really, Brother is going to give himself laryngitis if he keeps screaming so. We found the nicest fat quarter in an asparagus print, and on sale too, but as we checked out we heard the most annoying kitty shriek. Very annoying. Anyway, hopefully we will have brother back soon. The Burger King kitties tried to capture him for return to us earlier, but he managed to wrap his paws around the edge of a trash bin, and couldn't be pulled free. We don't need another trash bin, so we told them to wait a bit, until he falls asleep or something and lets go. Really, he's embarrassing.

Friday, March 15, 2013

Book Sale

The human visited the book sale today, instead of tomorrow, so she wouldn't have to worry about delays in getting to the quilt viewing. It was a considerable distance, but we're sure we heard a faint little kitty scream while the human was gathering books. Really, we don't know why brother was so upset. There was just one quilt book in the lot. That's not too bad, right? Oh, and when we got home, there was another message from the head bear. We just can't wait to visit the home of the bears! Now if we could only capture Brother and our new sibling. It's so annoying not to have them here. We saw the cutest shirts for felines today and couldn't make purchases because we don't know our brother's size!

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Quilt Show and Book Sale

This weekend is going to be lovely, truly wonderful. Not only is it time for the quilt show, but the giant book sale is this weekend too. Oh, our brother was truly miserable every time those events rolled around. He kept saying they gave us bad ideas and encouraged the polar bears. Not to mention the uptick in crime due to Betsy robbing the mountain bears and the hotel buffet. Brother will surely have a screaming fit this weekend, which will make his capture so much easier. We can't wait. And we can't wait to get more books and fabric. We need so many more clothes for our trip to visit the head bear. We want to look our best for her.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Note Left

The kitties at Burger King were sulking due to the poor choice of bait those humans put of for them. They were all lurking in their house. The humans who lived their either moved, or perhaps met a tragic demise and thanks to a few strategic laws, the cats have been able to claim the property. We stuck a note, asking them to turn our brother in, in their mailbox. Hopefully they'll rat him out soon.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Hanging Sign

The human was at a movie today, so we're going to have to wait until tomorrow to hang up that sign urging the other kitties to turn our brother in. Oh, we can't wait! We're sure those Burger King kitties will be happy to report him, and turn him over to us where he belongs in return for an amusement park trip. We bet there are a ton of kitty coasters there, and possibly a bouncy nap house too. The kitties will have a blast, and we will get Brother back. Honestly, the nerve of him hiding from us for so long.

Monday, March 11, 2013

We'll Get Him

We have made the perfect plan to capture our brother. We went to AAA today, and got material on the land of the head bear, and wouldn't you know it, they have an amusement park for his kind there. You would think being able to tour an amusement park would be enough to lure that kitty back, but it hasn't worked so far. So, we're going to hang up a sign at Burger King, offering a free trip and park tickets to the first kitty who turns our brother in. He'll be handed over in no time!

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Still Not Here

Brother is still not here. Really, we are getting so ticked at him for hiding like this. We know he's around. We heard him shriek when the human looked at luggage tags for our trip to see the head bear this afternoon. We don't know why he's being so difficult about returning home. He's not going to have any time to pack at this rate. Maybe we will get a burger tomorrow, and use it to set a trap for him. Obviously, the humans' attempts at trapping failed spectacularly.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Trap Report

No sign of brother yet. Hopefully he's in a trap somewhere that the humans drug off before we could check, and will show up tomorrow, but we're a little concerned that they didn't use the proper bait. Really, we don't know what the humans who set those traps were thinking. Obviously they have little trapping experience, and really should have consulted with an expert like Betsy Bear before poking the traps out and hoping for the best. They hoped to capture kitties who have made Burger King their home and spend their days feasting on cheeseburgers, fries, and large shakes. but do they put a single burger in the traps? Or a single piece of cheese? No, they go for dry cereal! It's a wonder they caught a single kitty with that sort of bait.

Friday, March 8, 2013

Traps Are Out

The kitty traps are out, but we are a bit concerned about how late they set them. What if all of the kitties are already in their beds snoozing? We have tried to evangelize to these kitties, on the virtues of a life of work, but they still seem more than a bit slothful and lazy. What if they turned in early?

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Trapping

We can't wait until those humans capture our brother for us. Really, we're so ashamed of that cat, and don't think we won't tell the other kitties he's been hanging about with about all of this too. He ought to be ashamed. And we hope he knows he has no one to blame but himself for the fact we stumbled across a potential illustrator for the bunny and bear books while we were trying to hunt him down online. If he had gotten himself back here with a friend or two, we would never have been looking on Craigslist, and wouldn't have seen the illustrator.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Brother's Doomed

Brother's doomed. A bunch of humans are arranging to capture kitties this weekend to fix their little wagons. They're going to sit out traps for them and everything. The humans are going to do our work for us! All we will have to do is to hop around and check the traps for Brother bright and early Saturday morning! Then we will just have to pull him out and drag him home! Really, he ought to be ashamed of himself, hiding like this and having to be trapped. You would think he doesn't like us the way he's acting.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Mountains

In a distraction from our brother hunt, we are planning a little trip to the mountains in a week or so. There's a quilt event the polar bears are dying to attend. You might recall our brother's complaints about it for the last couple of years. Maybe we'll be able to get some ideas for cute clothing while there, or better yet, visit one of the stores who stocks clothing for our kind. Really, Brother better get home now. If he waits much longer, there won't be a inch of luggage space left, and then what will he do?

Monday, March 4, 2013

Luggage and Brother

Okay, we are getting annoyed here. Brother really ought to be back by now, and yet he is staying in hiding. And he is supposed to bring a friend to be our new sibling too! Really, that poor other kitty. It is being denied a home, and what if it's a girl kitty? Then she's being denied the chance to have a nice wardrobe! And what about our trip? If Brother and our new sibling don't get here soon, all of the suitcase space will be claimed, and then what will they do? They certainly can't vacation NAKED!

Sunday, March 3, 2013

Church Today

Church was lovely today, and we're sure that our brother was very displeased about that. Our human met Cousin Berta, we're happy to say. She was very nice, and the human's hoping to call her next week to gather more information and possibly pictures. We sense the family tree growing. Really, we don't know why Brother isn't showing up to threaten it with an axe. Not that little kitten paws could do much damage.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Trip

Brother isn't going to be happy at all. The human has done more looking for our trip to visit the head bear today, and is currently debating the best hotel. Oh, we just can't wait to visit the leader of all bears! Brother ought to get himself home right this minute. We swear, he will not be able to get an inch of luggage space if he doesn't hurry. We wonder if we ought to book some extra seats for the return trip. We're sure we'll meet lots of new friends in the home of the bears, and we would hate for their ride home with us to be too cramped.

Friday, March 1, 2013

More Patterns

We cut out the pattern for the polar bears' fleecy jacket today, and we know we heard kitty screams with each snip of the scissors on the paper as we made our pattern. Brother must be lurking close by. Really, we don't know why he doesn't just come home. A rabbit is always awake, so he has no right to claim that there wasn't someone available to open the door for him. At the rate he is going, he is going to have to vacation NAKED!