Tarring and Feathering

I have the tar, not that it will show up on Nick's fur, but at least it will make the feathers stick, that is, if I ever get my paws on some feathers. I thought about asking my woodpecker tenant for some feathers he wasn't planning to wear again, but it turns out he donates all of his used feathers to some sort of bird charity, for birds who are down on their luck, and who are forced to actually nest in trees instead of cozy holes like he has. And when I asked the bunnies about hopping to the store for a sack of craft feathers, they were too busy, consoling the human over her remembrance of the trauma of being bullied and telling her how they would love to live in the country,and that they're sure the move will be a good thing if it comes to that. It looks like I'm going to have to rob a pillow, but that horrible cat will be feathered yet for causing me this horrible luck!