Lack of Feathers

There is a distinct lack of feathers in this place, at least feathers besides the outfit that my woodpecker tenant is currently wearing. I checked the pillows, only to find that they're stuffed with something the polar bears will surely mistake for wool, should they every spot it. Really, how in the world am I going to tar and feather Nick the Cat for inflicting such horrible luck on me if I can't find some feathers? And he richly deserves tarring and feathering too. I woke up this morning to a bunny measuring my bed, to figure out how best to pack it for the potential move to the country, and a batch of other rabbits, taking an inventory of my property, and wanting to know if I would absolutely need everything! Maybe I will catch the bus. It runs right by a bird store, and surely some of those creatures would be willing to donate their old feathers for such a good cause as punishing Nick the Cat for causing this trouble!