Valentine Horrors

Well, I don't have a new sibling yet, although the bunnies keep pointing out to me that the night is still young, and Amazon is happy to provide new family members. I can only hope they do not decide to take in an elephant from there. After the horrors I have experienced today, that is the last thing that I need. Betsy was out in full force today, celebrating the day of love by looting. I do hope no one wanted to experience romance with food on this happy occasion, for if you did, you are doomed to a massive disappointment. Betsy took to the air in that purloined sled, and I'm not entirely sure what she did, and I'm not sure it's safe to know, but there are now feathers in the swimming pool, and that delinquent bear has a bow and arrows in her possession. I can only assume that she attacked Cupid for all of his heart shaped boxes of chocolate. Should your sweetheart have made the claim that one of those was purchased for you, and then went missing, please see the rabbits tomorrow to remove the remains from the backyard. Oh, and should you have been trying to get married today, well, really you ought to have known better, shouldn't you? Everyone knows that the wedding chapels do a brisk business today, and Betsy has made careful note of all of them. You can collect your cake toppers in the morning. Please line up to the left of the people collecting the remains of the boxes of chocolate.