Suing the Post Office and Office Depot Too

I am going to be spending all of my time in court, is all that I can say, because Office Depot, the Post Office, and that pesky mailman who really ought to know better by now are being sued as soon as I can find a lawyer. You won't believe this, but Office Depot just sent the human a fat rebate card in the mail, a card that will be more than enough to cover the costs of getting holes punched in those nightmarish genealogy books, and in the books for church as well. My nap was rudely disturbed by her shouts of happiness upon opening the envelope and seeing the amount on her card. Office Depot should be ashamed, and I don't know what the post office was thinking! And now she's thinking of calling the church right away, to see about getting things set up to get those books made quickly. I am doomed!