To Whom It May Concern I.E. The Sheep

If any sheep are reading this, and I do hope you are, you should know right now that your wool is doomed. Perhaps you ought to go ahead and sheer yourselves now, to save yourselves some trouble later. Another polar bear moved in here today, and naturally she didn't waste any time putting her fluffy head together with the other polar bears to plot quilt construction and how wool might be obtained for batting in these quilts. I now have four full sized polar bear sisters and three cub nephews, so I'm sure you can see that there is no way your wool will be spared. And that's assuming that they don't draft some other members of my 659 siblings to assist them in wool gathering. I would place an order for sweaters now. Perhaps you can get some sort of group rate.