Egg Hunt Woes Too

Oh, and as if the vegetables weren't enough, the bunnies also came back with several bags of candy, to be stuffed into those eggs for the egg hunt they have planned for the reunion. The thing is going to be a horrible success, I just know it. And do you know what else those rabbits have done, just to make my nightmares worse? They have signed me up for an egg hiding CLASS! Introduction to Egg Hiding 101, which starts next week and is conducted by their leader, the Easter Bunny. They gave me the awful news like it was something to be proud of, the fact I will be a grown feline in a class made up of infant rabbits! Humiliated, I will be totally humiliated! Those bunnies should be ashamed, forcing me to to attend something like this!

Sorry for the Lack of Warning

I'm sorry for the lack of warning. Blogger was acting up last night, or I surely would have posted an alert. The humans went to the country today, and of course, a batch of rabbits hopped along with them. Oh, I will have nightmares for sure when I recall what they came back with. More strawberries, asparagus, garlic, pumpkin and squash seed, a four pack of tomatoes! And it was all such a reasonable price, too. They're thinking about heading back to the country tomorrow to do a bit more discount shopping. Flee now, while you still can! RUN!

Further Neighbor Issues

Oh, and the bunnies' associate, the neighbor who actually gardens, is up to something, too. He's asked the grandhuman for a ride to a doctor's appointment tomorrow. A doctor. Yeah, right. He's probably going to see a batch of bunnies, amusing themselves impersonating a physician. And they'll undoubtedly give him a prescription for gardening. Then the humans will feel sorry for him, since he is claiming illness and will get a plow and dig for him! I can just see it now!

Join Me in Offering Up Prayers

Please join me in offering up prayers for the poor, non-gardening neighbors who are doomed. A bunny hopped out today, and came back with a huge sack of dirt, little holders for the rapidly sprouting seed, two tomato plants, ten strawberries and the horrible news that Walmart is having a sale on their berry bushes, grape vines and other assorted vegetable packs. I think we can safely figure where those bunnies will be tomorrow. They're even talking about hopping to the bus stop should the human be too busy to take them. They moved alarming amounts of seeds to the little seed holders, and promptly replaced it. They added bush champion cucumber. Boston pickling cucumber, Poinsett #76 cucumber, marketmore cucumber, national pickling cucumber, summer choice tomato, big boy tomato, rutgers tomato, triple treat pumpkins and Hungarian hot wax peppers. Our poor neighbors. Our poor, poor neighbors. Please remember them in prayer, for they are about to become homeless.

Cotton

The cotton is sprouting. At first, I thought that would be good news, since at least it would keep the polar bears occupied and not with their wool obsession, but now I have realized there is a problem. The polar bears were thrilled when the bunnies told them that what they think are wool plants were sprouting, and they offered their assistance in the garden right away to get things ready for planting. And then the sheep sent a message, offering their help as well. They figure if the polar bears are growing what they think is wool, they'll leave them alone, so they're willing to do anything to encourage this crop. A flock of them is probably already on their way over to help with digging! We are doomed!

It's Started

It's started. The bunnies checked their little bags this afternoon, and they found the first sprouts! They just poked things into the bags on Saturday! Three days! They have sprouts in three days! We are doomed. We are all doomed! And, even worse, they haven't had a chance to get their paws on a plow yet, so they're talking about hopping to the garden store in the morning to purchase special containers to hold their sprouts until they get the ground plowed up. I expect our gardening neighbor to schedule a setback with his faked illness in the morning, to assist them with this. The cucumbers are sprouting, I'm very sad to say, along with the zucchini, and I believe the bunnies said some of the cantaloupe and honeydew melons. I'm sure the watermelon and pumpkins can't be far behind.

Egg Hunt Horrors Continue

The egg hunt horrors are continuing. The bunnies obtained more eggs this afternoon, for hiding purposes. They now have 168 eggs. And, of course, they are planning to force me to assist in the hiding. Do you know how long that will take? I will be forced to work forever! And, in an even worse bit of news, they got their paws on these little golf clubs shaped like carrots, and are going to offer to set up something with them at the reunion for the human. It is all part of a plot to brainwash people into becoming vegetarians and bunny-lovers, no doubt!

More Trouble!

Not content with having a bag half filled, the rabbits poked more seed in. Here's the additional horror; Mandarian squash, Chinese cucumbers, apple cucumbers also from China, possibly a gift for the Year of the Rabbit, South Korean cucumbers, Belgian cucumbers and the one decent thing the bunnies poked in the bag, cotton. At least if they grow that, some sheep might have their wool spared. I must try to think of it that way.

Offer Up Prayers, Please

Please join me in offering up prayers for our poor, misfortunate, non-gardening neighbors, for they are doomed. Our other neighbor, the bunnies' associate, is doing quite well with his horrible plot. He actually got the grandhuman and the other neighbors to mow his lawn for him today. Plowing can't be far behind. I even saw an email he sent to the rabbits, chuckling about it and thanking his cotton-tailed friends for their excellent advice. In anticipation of the arrival of this plow, the bunnies poked three bags full of seed for starting purposes. I have never seen little bags packed so full. Here's what they have; two packs of butternut squash, straight eight cucumber,spinach, collards, kohlrabi, national pickling cucumber, kale, sweet banana pepper, grand bell pepper, two packs of cauliflower, small gourds, whale gourd, gooseneck gourd, caveman club gourd, apple gourd, some other gourd of a kind I fear to know, two packs of broccoli, cantaloupe, honeydew melon, massive amounts of watermelon, two packs of California wonder peppers, cayenne pepper, long sweet pepper, jalepeno pepper, cabbage, eggplant, gray zucchini, sumter cucumber yellow squash, big Max pumpkin, some assorted pumpkins, regular zucchini, san marzino tomato, cherry tomato, ace tomato, fireball tomato, homestead tomato, super marmande tomato, roma tomato, delicious tomato, cherokee purple tomato, pink tomato, brandywine tomato, Carolina gold tomato, Mr. Stripey tomato, and green Zebra tomato. And they still have space in the bags for more!

The Neighbor

Our neighbor is up to something. I'm not sure exactly what yet, but I know it doesn't bode well, whatever it is. For the last few days, he has been claiming illness, resulting in much worry and feeling sorry for him on the humans' part. I would be sympathetic, but frankly, I am suspicious about the timing of this illness. This human is a gardener, and thus an associate of the RABBITS! I'm sure this is all part of some plot he's cooked up, possibly on the advice of those cotton-tailed troublemakers. The humans are talking about assisting him with digging his garden now, due to how sorry they feel for him, which will surely call for the rental of a plow. And once the plow is done with the neighbor's garden, of course, the bunnies will be able to get their paws on it, to finish preparing their plots. I'm sure those rabbits have put him up to this, probably with a seed bribe, and I hope he feels totally ashamed of himself, when our other, non-gardening neighbors end up homeless!

Rabbit Watch

I've been on rabbit watch today, camping out by the sliding glass door to observe the garden area in the backyard, and you don't want to know the horrors that I have seen. I'm going to mention them anyway, though, so you best shoo small children away right now, or possibly cover your eyes. There have been rabbits hopping around out there like crazy, poking out stakes, tilling soil, and doing mightmarish amounts of tasks they claim are essential to a garden. Really, after seeing all of that, I don't know how I will be able to sleep tonight. I might end up the first feline to ever suffer insomnia.

Egg Hunt Orders

The rabbits issued my egg hunt orders today. They claim since I'm not an experienced egg hider, unlike bunnies, that they would give me an easy assignment, but I checked, and I am down to hide the eggs that are stuffed with cash! Not only will that money attract children, but it's sure to attract Betsy Bear, who will try to snatch it for snack purchase purposes! So much for those rabbits' claim that they were giving me an easy task. And I'm sure they did it on purpose, too. They don't have claws, just pointy carrots, no defense at all against Betsy. They probably expect me to wreck my nice claws defending those eggs for them!

What the Easter bunny Brought

The Easter Bunny hopped by and dropped off another rabbit, this time one of his personal bunny servants! Oh, I can't imagine a worse sign. If he's dropping off one of his personal servants, that must mean he's very impressed with what my delinquent rabbit siblings are plotting. And what they have planned is the stuff of nightmares. They're going all out on that egg hunt for the family reunion. They've already started to stuff the eggs they got with cash, as gifts for the children. Oh, if they know there's money involved, they'll want to hunt those blasted eggs for sure! The egg hunt will be an awful success! And then there's the issue of who will be hiding those eggs. I happened across a picture they drew for the planned hiding job, and I don't like what I saw. True, the picture had a lot of potential hiding places illustrated, but then the bunnies had drawn ME, with a pair of fake rabbit ears on my head, dragging a basket full of eggs around for hiding purposes! They're planning to make me work! They're planning to make me an honorary rabbit! And the more help the Easter Bunny drops off here, the more likely those bunnies are to succeed!

Trouble, I'm Sure

When the human came in, she reported something alarming. There was a rabbit, in a frock coat and vest, only a few blocks away from the house, hopping in this general direction. A bunny in a frock coat and vest? That's their leader! He's coming back! He's probably coming back to bring more seed to my bunny siblings! Or to drop off more rabbits to assist with gardening or egg hunt planning! Do you think I have time to poke out a few of Betsy's snares in hopes of stopping him? But where could I put them? Since it isn't Easter, he won't be taking his usual path, The Bunny Trail, so he could arrive from any direction! I'm doomed!

Country Report

The humans' visit to the country went well yesterday, and now there is much talk about a return trip in a few days. And I do not like how frequently my name is coming up as those bunnies chatter about a return trip. The group of rabbits that hopped off to the country on Saturday had a lovely time, raiding pastures for manure and hopping by poor Farmer Turley's for snacks. I do hope he wasn't too fond of his tomato crops. So naturally, the rabbits want to return, and they want to drag me along. And what do they want me for? for conversion into a VEGETARIAN!! Once they have me out in the country, where I won't have the ability to call for decent food, the bunnies are sure they will have me. I'll have to munch down the vegetables, or possibly have to go to the trouble of hunting down a mouse, and risking a lawsuit from that large rodent in Florida for threatening a relation. If those rabbits have their way, I might be a vegetarian by weekend! Oh, woe is me!

Should You Live in the Country

If you've made the mistake of making your home in the country, RUN! Run now before it is too late! The humans are about to head off for the country cottage to clean up, and Betsy Bear is planning to accompany them! And, in even worse news for the human's poor cousin, Farmer Turley, an alarming number of rabbits seem to be planning to hop along as well! Run while you still have time!

Egg Hunt

The bunnies got a letter from their leader this morning, accepting with pleasure their kind invitation to attend the egg hunt planned for the family reunion. Such a fast reply probably sets some sort of record for a response to correspondence. Just my luck. And the head rabbit was so pleased with this continuation of Easter that he dropped another bunny off here to assist in the hiding of eggs! EGGS!! There are over a hundred plastic eggs here, already, for hiding purposes, along with a basket for transporting eggs, and special tape, to mark off the area in which these eggs are to be hidden. The egg hunt is definitely looking like it is going to occur, and it will be just my luck, that the bunnies will figure out some way to make me assist! They'll probably try to poke a pair of rabbit ears on me, to declare me an honorary bunny, so I will have to help with hiding!

For Once the Rabbits Aren't to Blame

This is a change, but for once, those bunnies aren't to blame for bad weather. I'm sure it will come as a shock to my readers, who know the damage the bunnies have managed to cause, with their rain dances, but they weren't holding a dance last night, no matter what the storms might lead you to suspect. Of course, the only reason they weren't dancing was because they were making plans for something worse. The human is planning an egg hunt for that horrible reunion, to give the children something to do, and the bunnies are wanting to invite their leader to head this activity. They were all occupied yesterday, writing the letter to him, asking him to grace the reunion with his cotton tailed presence, and thus can't be held accountable in any way, shape or form for any bad weather.

Driving

You won't believe the horror the bunnies just found on Facebook! Driver's licenses for dogs, and for cats too! They're already making plans to get me one of the little things right away, and I know that no good can come of my becoming a licensed driver. The bunnies will undoubtedly expect me to drive them places, and even worse, to drive large amounts of seed and plants back to our house to be added to the garden! Is there a way to contact the driver's bureau and to tell them as much as I appreciate the thought, I would just as soon not operate a motor vehicle? The human would probably get into the act too, and I would be forced to drive her on family tree hunts. No, nothing good can come of my driving an automobile, nothing good at all!

Sack Horrors

I was so distracted by the Easter horrors that I almost forgot to tell you about the sack horrors, or maybe I was hopping if I didn't say anything, that somehow the horror would disappear. The bunnies arranged the purchase of 150 sacks to be used as goodie bags for the family reunion last week. That means that goodie bags are definitely going to be constructed, which also means that those rabbits are going to be hopping around sooner or later, expecting me to work and help assemble them! My poor paws. My poor, poor paws. I can feel the blisters already, and the pointy bruises on my backside, from being poked with carrots and ordered to stuff the bags faster!

Today's Weather

The praise from their leader went totally to the bunnies' heads, just like I feared it would. They held a rain dance this afternoon, to encourage garden growth, and things got totally out of hand. Trees are down everywhere, and I don't know what that church that now has a large piece of lumber in their sanctuary will do if they ever find out about the rabbits' involvement. Really, they ought to be ashamed. And you should have seen them running about, when things got out of hand. They were even talking about grabbing me and heading for the storm cellar! We don't have a storm cellar! I was almost captured and forced to sit in the damp, hole of a basement crawlspace!

Easter Success

I'm very sorry to announce the complete, utter success of Easter. I had high hopes that Easter would fail this morning, when I heard one of Betsy's snares go off, and looked out the window to see the rabbits' leader dangling upside down by one of his big feet in it. I was sure he would get annoyed, and go hopping home. But no such luck. The bunnies rushed out and freed him. He did loose all of his candy and chocolate eggs to Betsy, of course, but the gifts for the rabbits were still intact. SEED! Gift certificates for seed and garden stores! An extra rabbit to assist them with planting, and promises to send more bunnies to help soon, with how impressed the head rabbit was by the industry my rabbit siblings have shown thus far! Horrors to numerous to be imagined! And, even worse, the head bunny said he might RETURN! HE was so impressed with what the bunnies have done thus far that he wants to check it out again! What if he brings them more stuff when he drops back in?

Horror Hopping Along

In just a few horrors, horror will come hopping along as the rabbits' leader, the Easter Bunny, comes hopping down the bunny trail to make his annual visit. The bunnies are bouncing around, all excited about it now. I don't know how I'll get any sleep with the noise they're making, not that I think I would get any rest anyway, even if I could doze. I'm sure my sleep would be filled with horrible nightmares about what that rabbit will be bringing for my bunny siblings in his baskets. I just know he has seed for them. Betsy's got snares laid to capture him, of course, but she just wants the candy in his basket. She'll leave the seed for sure, so he'll be able to deliver it as soon as he gets free!

Beginning Garden Horrors Continued

My paws were too sore from being forced to aid in the construction of Welcome signs to do much typing last night, so I couldn't properly share with you the horrors of yesterday. The paws are a bit better this morning, though, so I thought you should be warned. Please lock all small children away now before they can see and become frightened. The bunnies got their paws on more plants yesterday! They are now the proud owners of four pepper plants, and twelve tomatoes! And this is just the start of the gardening season, too! If it's just started, and they already have that many plants, who knows what might happen next! The price for the plants was very reasonable, too, and due to a mix-up on their ticket, the humans might have to go out to the store again in a few days. The rabbits are sure to hop along and get additional plants. Oh, we are all doomed! And they were so inspired by these things that they're starting to talk about sprouting SEED next! Sprouting seed. Oh, woe is me! And what in the world is going to happen when the Easter Bunny arrives and sees their industry? He's sure to lavish rich rewards upon them, rich SEED rewards! Our poor neighbors. I suppose I ought to drag some crates down to their house in a bit, for they will surely need to start packing soon.

Sorry About Last Night

I'm sorry I didn't post last night. I was just about to, when those bunnies pounced on me. Apparently, it's finally occurred to them that they just have to stake out the computer for a bit, should they want to grab me for work purposes. They made me spend the evening assisting them in making a large banner for the weekend, to welcome their leader when he comes hopping around with his little baskets, undoubtedly full of seed to render our poor neighbors homeless. I think I might have to spend Sunday in hiding. The number of signs with gushing words of welcome for the Easter Bunny is positively embarrassing!

First Plant

The first plant is now out, in the bunnies' garden, some sort of herb called fennel. Garden season has officially begun. Oh, this is the worst sign possible, the fact the rabbits have started planting so early. It's sure to impress the head rabbit immensely when he comes hopping around on Sunday, that my bunny siblings already have a plant out, earlier than any other rabbit around! And he's sure to reward them accordingly for this accomplishment! Any rewards will likely be of the seed variety, too, which will only lead to more gardening. This year's season is shaping up to be the worst yet! I wonder if I ought to go ahead and talk to the neighbors now, to let them know that they should flee while they still can?

Late Posting

Sorry I'm so late posting tonight. The power cord for the modem went missing. I suspect the bunnies were using it for something plant related. Their leader is going to be hopping around soon, and they're all in a frenzy, determined to show him what good, industrious rabbits they are. I am afraid to think of what he might give them this year as a reward for their bunny industry, seeing as he just finished a film. He'll have nightmarish amounts of cash to pass out to his subjects for garden expenses, I'm sure.

More Issues From that Shower

Really, this horrible event keeps leading to trouble, and it's already over. Anyway, the food and goodies got a ton of praise, and humans saying how nice and clever everything was. Needless to say, those cotton tailed little pests were thrilled to have their industry complimented in this manner, and it's put horrible ideas into their heads, horrible ideas that will lead to work for me! I've already seen the list, so I know this is true. Cupcakes in reunion colors, and it's never had an official color, so that will lead to who knows how much trouble as the bunnies hop around, debating potential colors. And then I'll be captured again, and forced to assist them with the cupcake baking! Or possibly with stand construction. Do you know how many people attend these horrible, horrible events? Many more than attended that shower. My poor paws hurt just thinking of the size of stand that would be needed for cupcakes, and what in the world will I do if another cat sees me working on assembling it? Or worse, in an apron being forced to ferry food from stove to counter for decoration purposes?

Another Shower Issue

Besides the fact that I was forced to work, I have other issues with that shower. The cupcakes were decorated with little teddy bears, and then there were alarming numbers of songs related to bears on the the CDs that were burned as party favors. If the human had been well enough to attend, she was even thinking about taking a few bears, to loiter decoratively as party atmosphere. I can only assume that the presence of all of these things related to bears is part of some plot, to brainwash people into liking the fluffy things, and wanting to give them homes! Can I be held as an accessory to this plot, since I was forced to assist with it? Believe me, it wasn't my idea!

Ignore Our Brother

It's Bebe, just letting you know that you should ignore our brother and his complaints that we played some sort of evil trick on him. We clearly told him last night, before he faked limping off to bed, that the table was going to be full of party supplies this morning, to make things easier for the human who was transporting them to the shower. There was no reason for him to think the plant he attacked belonged to us, and was for the garden. It is barely SPRING! Garden plants are much smaller at this time of the year, and are in seed cups. This was clearly a full grown flower, in a vase. Our brother had no reason not to figure out what it was!

Rabbits Tricked Me

Those rotten bunnies pulled a cruel trick, something to punish me for my complaints, I am sure. I was checking out the kitchen bright and early this morning, to make sure that those bunnies didn't have a few little projects lined up for me, when I spotted a plant on the table. Of course, I figured it belonged to the bunnies, and was possibly a start for their garden, so I decided to dispose of it at once, and the only way I could think of to do it was to force myself to eat it. I had no more than taken a nibble, when the rabbits came rushing in shouting! Apparently it was their plant, but it was a fake one, they had got out last night after I had gone to bed to rest my paws, to provide more decoration for the shower. A fake plant. Does anyone know what is the best way to remove plastic leaves, and silk petals from your teeth? Not to mention the taste?

Back from Torture

Well, I'm back from my torture, preparing those annoying little goodie bags. Really, the bunnies should be ashamed of themselves, forcing me into working. I don't care if there were only twenty bags. I'm sure that was enough work to give me blisters on my paws! I'm very sorry to say that the baking was a horrible success, too. I'm sure that will only lead to the rabbits trying to find a way to cook again, and to them demanding my assistance! I have to find a better hiding place while I still have time!

Annann Polar Bear Reporting

Our brother has been captured, and drug to assist with baking, and a group of bears is wanting to get on, to assist with the burning of CDs for the baby shower, but we thought we would take a moment to chat first. I see our brother posted a photo of that selfish sheep who refused to share his wool with a batch of needy polar bears. Believe me, it was a hot topic for discussion on all of the polar bear email lists. Just look at him, so fluffy and woolly! He would probably be enough to stuff an entire quilt! But when the polar bears approached him, and asked for his assistance to help a group of poor endangered animals, what did the selfish sheep do but to say no, and then to dart away. It is his fault entirely that he got stuck, and had to be rescued by humans. Never fear, though. We polar bears are resourceful. I heard about it from the bears involved. They waited until the humans got him down, and he was gloating about getting his sheepy face in the news, and then they pounced! All of that wonderful wool is now stuffed into a quilt in a nice den somewhere!

Look What the Polar Bears Did!

Well, I expect those rabbits to come hopping in, to capture me for baking assistance purposes at any moment, just as soon as they finish their breakfast carrots, but before I try to find a workable hiding place, I thought I would show you what a group of polar bears did. Take a look at this!



This poor, poor sheep. The humans involved in the incident think he got stuck on the wire while trying to get to a batch of female sheep, but I know better. There were polar bears, after him for his wool, and he ended up stuck while trying to escape them! Really, don't these humans pay attention? How could they miss the group of bears, lurking about with scissors for shearing purposes?

Really, Brother

Hey, it's Josie Rabbit here. Bebe's in the kitchen, getting the chairs set up, so we can reach the counters for baking tomorrow, so she asked me to post. Please ignore everything our brother is saying. He has absolutely no right to be making such a fuss about our planned baking. We have only assigned him one job, that of tying up the goodie bags once we have stuffed them. Really, how much work is that? There are only going to be twenty guests. He could probably be done with the tying in a few minutes, if he showed even a bit of industry! He has absolutely no right to complain at all. He gets to lounge around, while we bake, and he only has to do his part when we're done. Really, he has the easiest job, and he should appreciate our kindness in finding it for him.

Doom Scheduled

My doom is scheduled for tomorrow. The bunnies have decided to spend the day baking, so they can potentially help the human with CD burning on Friday. Oh, I am so doomed! They've even got a little apron out, that they're sure will fit me perfectly! What if some other cat sees me in an apron? I will never live the embarrassment down! And then there's all the baking they have planned. I can feel my fur drying out from the heat just thinking about it? Why, oh why, did the human have to fall ill, and worse, why did she have to accept the bunnies' offer to take over for her?

Lock Me Up!

I demand to be locked up right away! I absolutely insist! I thought that the human being ill meant that I was safe from baking related confinement but now the rabbits have poked their long, floppy ears and fuzzy cotton tails into the situation! They hopped into the human's room to let her know how sorry they feel for her, and how, since she is under the weather, and possibly on the verge of laryngitis, that they will be happy to take over, and handle all of the baking! What in the world did I do wrong to deserve torture like this? The bunnies are in the kitchen right now, happily going through cookbooks, to pick various goodies to bake! The human just planned cupcakes, cookies and brownies, an annoying amount of food, but manageable, but now the rabbits are planning a nightmare of cooking! And they have me down to assist them! Why in the world did the human have to get sick? She should be ashamed! Now, instead of lounging locked away from work, while she slaves over a hot oven, I will be expected to be in there, letting the heat ruin my fur, while the bunnies force me to assist them! I know they already have my name on a list somewhere, as a tier or something, to wrap up the favor bags once the bunnies have packed them with baked goodies. And you know, they're going to claim my knots and bows aren't done right, and I'll probably have to redo them a million times! Oh, why did the human have to do this, and take ill?

Cupcake Horror

The human obtained frosting for those horrible cupcakes today. Currently five pounds of it, in a large bowl, are sitting on the kitchen table, taking up valuable space that I could be occupying. Do you know the alarming size that five pounds of frosting is? On the up side, though, the human is currently ill due to some sinus thing, so no baking can be done until she recovers. It is annoying hearing her sniffling and sneezing, of course, but I suppose I could borrow some more wool from Shelia Sheep to stuff in my ears to block the noise.

Saturday Alarm

Sorry I didn't post last night. It was all that I could do to stay on my paws, after the horrors that I experienced. I swear, there is not another kitty around who has as terrible luck as I do. Really, I suspect for my luck to be this terrible continuously, that some member of that horrible Nick the Cat's family is lurking around, spreading bad luck all over the area. I ought to take him to court, I really ought to. Anyway, the human has offered to make cupcakes for a baby shower, since she made the wedding cake for the mother a few years ago. And, like during the wedding cake construction, I will be incarcerated for the duration. My only comfort is that cupcakes surely will not take as long to bake as a three tier cake, so my time in jail will be limited. But, to make things worse, the human is also making favors with this shower, including a baby themed CD for each guest! So, she was online last night looking for CDs to order, to put this music on, and horror of horrors, she found a wonderful sale on them! She ordered two packs, enough to make up CDs for the reunion too! Sniff, sniff, sniff! So now the rabbits are making another list, for an assembly line for the reunion CDs, and once more, my name is on it. Really, I can't turn around in this house anymore, without tripping over a bunny created list, promising more work for me. They ought to be ashamed of themselves, and now they're potentially planning to force me to work as a labeler for 100 CDs!

Sack Update

The bunnies have put their fluffy heads together, and you won't believe the horrible sack plans they have came up with. First, they're wanting to get the reunion name put on the bags, which guarantees they will need to make a large sack purchase soon, so they'll have time to figure out how to get the name on. Then, they're talking about ribbons and things to decorate the sacks, including color-coded ribbons so they will know who gets what sack! Ribbons! And you know they've already got a list for tying these ribbons, probably with my name right at the top!

Sacks!

Doomed, I am doomed! A rabbit went hopping off, to check out the produce market for sales on plants and other garden materials this afternoon, and you will never believe the horror that the bunny had in her paws, when she came hopping back! She had a SACK! A sack to be used for goodie bag construction! There is just one sack right now, because she wanted to get the opinions of all of her fellow rabbits on it first, but they all seemed thrilled with it, so they're probably going to get a group together tomorrow, to hop back, to get the rest of the sacks they need to the goodie bags. I am doomed! Obtaining sacks mean those bags are definitely going to be constructed, which means those rabbits are definitely going to try to make me work! And even worse, the sacks are very reasonably priced, which means the bunnies will likely be able to purchase garden supplies with the savings!

Further Horrors

You won't believe the horror that arrived in the human's email a few hours ago. The theater where the rabbits went to see their leader on the big screen just sent the human a COUPON! So now the human is wanting to to the theater, and horror of horrors, since the she says the bunnies have been so GOOD lately, she's thinking of letting them see their leader's film again! Oh, what did I do wrong? If those bunnies get to hop to that horrible movie, they will surely expect me to come along as well! Another afternoon ruined, by being forced into a theater full of rabbits! What did I do wrong to deserve such punishment?

Thought I Would Show Some Horror

I thought since the rabbits have amused themselves posting frightening pictures here, that I would offer up something truely frightening. Please make sure that no small children are nearby before looking at this. I give you




The Goodie Bag Items!

I hope the sight of all of this stuff, awaiting packing into various bags doesn't frighten anyone too much. And, I am very much afraid that this is just the start of the items to be included in the bag. This photo was taken when the human had just started gathering things, so she has at least three times the amount of materials now.

Condo Takeover

The rabbits have taken over my kitty condo, and I need advice on how to evict them. They decided it was just the perfect place to model their new clothing, so that alterations could be made, so I've had a bunny perched on the ceiling of the condo all day, trying on various outfits, while another bunny hops around, with pins and chalk and who knows what else, seeing where the alterations will need to be made, to get the best bunny fit! Does anyone know how in the world I can evict this fashion show?

Today's Rabbit Report

One of the bunnies hopped out this afternoon, and came back with a load of clothing in rabbit sizes and styles, I'm very annoyed to announce. The bunnies are all hopping around right now, trying it on, and making notes about alterations that are needed, and additional outfits that should be purchased when they go out again. Just perfect. Alternations mean sewing, and that will undoubtedly get the polar bears all fired up too. I might as well cancel my scheduled naps for tomorrow right now, for thanks to my siblings, I'm sure not to get in a single wink!

Sibling Update

A church let another homeless animal escape today. I am now up to 673 siblings. On the up side, this one is a leopard, which means she is a fellow feline, but on the down side, she seemed rather pleased to meet all of the bunnies, and she promptly started chattering with them about ear accessories and fashion. Somehow, this doesn't seem like the best sign to me. The bunnies are getting other cats on their side now! What if they convince this leopard that she should assist them in forcing me to work?

The Bunny Movie

The rabbits attended their leader's film early this afternoon. What a nightmare. Carrot juice everywhere, and carrot sticks, and I'm afraid to think of what other veggies the theater served in little sacks, in honor of the occasion. Really, they ought to be ashamed of themselves, and I ought to report them to someone! They actually gave this bunny movie a family friendly rating! Family friendly! Such rabbit horror deserves nothing less than an X rating!

Going to a Movie

I finally convinced the baby bunny who was assigned to guard me to let me on for a minute to post. The bunnies caught me, and have me leashed, in anticipation of attending that bunny movie tomorrow. It seems that all of the bunnies in the area are planning to see the film in shifts, so I'm not sure at what time I will be drug in to this movie, but they're definitely going to force me to attend. I wonder if they can be charged with cruelty to cats? All of that hopping, and carrot juice not to mention the shear number of bunnies! What a nightmare!

Movie Tomorrow!

It's Bebe, here to give you the good news. We've already captured our brother, in anticipation of our trip to see the head bunny on the big screen tomorrow. Oh, it's going to be such a nice day, attending our leader's appearance on the big screen. And once he's there, we're sure that our brother will enjoy himself immensely. We've already arranged to obtain a large sack of popcorn for him, and everything to make him happy, so he has absolutely nothing to complain about. We just hope we can stand the wait for morning!

My Doom Approaches

My doom is approaching on big bunny feet. Not only do I have a ton of work that the rabbits are planning to make me do, but the movie starring their leader comes out this Friday. They're already hopping around, getting ready to attend, and to drag me along to this film. They have even obtained a little pair of fake rabbit ears to stick on me, so that I will be an honorary bunny for the duration of the movie. They're going to make me dress like a rabbit! Have you ever heard anything so embarrassing in your life?

Tail Camouflage

Does anyone have any suggestions for tail camouflage? Really, I'm so proud of my long, silky tail, but I'm afraid the rabbits are right. It does tend to give my hiding places away. Not that I would want the bunnies' fuzzy cotton tails for anything, but still, I have to do something with this tail to make it harder to spot. I thought about hiding in the yarn bin, sure the tail wouldn't be detected in there, but it's turned nippy again and the polar bears are hard at work, knitting mittens and scarves, so I didn't dare take the risk. Right now, I'm lurking by the basket full of various power cords, but I'm not sure how well that will work long term. Sooner or later, the rabbits will need a cord to plug in the iron, or the hot glue gun, and they'll spot my tail again for sure! So, does anyone know a good way to hide the tail before it is to late, and I am forced to work?

See Our Brother's Been Here

Well, we see our brother's been on here, once more hoping to convince us that he's left town. Really, we don't know why he keeps trying. We can see his tail, poking out from under the bed and we can hear that bell from time to time. We know he's in here. We rabbits weren't born yesterday, we hope he knows. Anyway, he will be working tomorrow. We were going to work on the seed envelopes today, but the human wasn't feeling well, so we decided to wait. Tomorrow, though, first thing, he is taking his assigned place in the assembly line, so our brother can just stop hiding right this minute! Really, a little work will be good for him.

Trouble!

If the bunnies come on here, I am not here. You have no idea where I might have gone, but I am definitely not here. Oh, this is terrible, just terrible! The bunnies have started getting things ready to start seed envelope construction, possibly as early as tomorrow! They already have my leash out, ready to catch me for the assembly line! And, in even worse news, the human just got the happy news about the impending arrival of another relative, which, of course, means that I will be expected to stuff yet another goodie bag!

Today's Report

No sign of that peahen or her friend, the peacock yet. I'm not sure if that's good or not. Granted, they are big birds, and I could probably get a ton of money renting a nest to them, but still, there's the noise to consider. I hate to think of how much I would be charged to get a noise clause added to the lease agreement, if I could manage to find a feline lawyer who isn't tied up helping those mountain bears with their cases against Betsy. And then there's Betsy. She's sure this peahen is an escapee from a wedding, which means cake might be in the area. So she's been stalking around all day, trying to figure out where in the world said cake might be. I'm very much afraid she's thinking of doing a house to house search soon. I wonder if I ought to call our neighbors, to warn them their food is doomed?

Peahen

There is a peahen running loose in the neighborhood. The human came back just a bit ago, and reported sighting the bird trotting down the sidewalk, possibly heading for the local church. Honestly, a peahen, and her mate the peacock is probably somewhere around here too. Okay, they are birds, and I ought to be pleased to have new birds in the neighborhood that might be in need of a new nest to rent, but I sense potential trouble. Betsy is sure that this bird is a fugitive from someone's wedding, and she's trying to make me get off line so she can find a website to learn how to capture it, and force the bird to lead her back to the wedding cake. Not to mention, I've heard that peahens and their beaus the peacocks are rather noisy to say the least. Do you know how much trouble I would have to go to, getting a noise clause drafted for a lease agreement?

Doing Math

I've done a bit of math, to figure out how bad this movie will be, and I'm afraid it is looking to be worse than I feared. The bunnies figure that at least four, and possibly five rabbits will be able to occupy one human seat. Now, assuming that each movie theater has 200 seats, that indicates that I will be attending this film with 800 to 1000 rabbits, possibly even more if a lot of them are very young bunnies! This is a nightmare! I can just imagine it now. They will be hopping all over, de rinking carrot juice, munching carrot sticks and celebrating the head bunny's big screen appearance. I don't care if they promise me a large tub of popcorn with unlimited refills! No amount of corn is enough to make up for that degree of torture!

Impending Torture!

The rabbits have already arranged to get me a seat at the horrible rabbit movie coming out next week. I wonder if that is enough for me to bring criminal charges against them? I can see it now, I will be in a theater, the only feline, with bunnies everywhere, hopping about, and probably spilling carrot juice all over me as they watch their leader on the big screen. Really, no amount of popcorn is enough to make up for being forced to eat it in the middle of such a rabbit disaster!

Excellent Film Coming!

Well, I see our brother has already been on here, complaining about the excellent movie that's about to come out. Really, we don't know what his problem is. This movie starring the head bunny looks like it's going to be an excellent film. Oh, well. We'll sure he'll like it a lot more once he gets to the theater with us. We're already chatting with other rabbits about organizing a group to attend on opening day, and of course our brother will be accompanying us. Once he gets there and probably gets his paws on a tub of large popcorn, we're sure he'll love the movie.

I Can't Believe This!

I can't believe this, and I can only pray this movie has an X rating. Someone has actually made a film about the head rabbit, The Easter Bunny, alias Peter Cottontail! Rabbit encouragement on a large screen! Doomed, we are all doomed! The bunnies are already making plans to see this film. Knowing them, they're probably going to want to camp out in front of the theater to make sure they're the first ones there. And I'm sure that they're going to expect me to assist them in some way with this. I don't know yet what they're going to expect me to do, but I am sure they will expect something from me, to assist them in seeing this film. We are all doomed!

Lousy Library

I must find a way to punish the library too, I really have to. Honestly, you would think that place would have a bit more sense, wouldn't you, but then again, what could you expect from a location that stocks so many gardening books, and actually allows bunnies to hop in to borrow them? And seeing as they're barely a block away from our dwelling, you would think they wouldn't do that. They're lucky the books didn't teach the rabbits how to overtake their building with watermelon or squash vines. Today was the absolute worst, though. They let the human get her hands on a batch of CDs that she is planning to use to make a mix for the reunion! And the bunnies have already obtained holders for this little project! They will be on here forever burning things, and how will I get my blogging done, I would like to know!

I Hate Walmart

I hate Walmart. Really, that horrible business ought to be ashamed of itself, with the amount of encouragement it keeps offering to the human, and to those bunnies too, for family tree construction and reunion planning. The allowed the human to get a big batch of pictures printed up today, to be lagged to the reunion in those little photo albums she always takes, and even worse, they sold the bunnies a batch of those little stars to be stuck onto things to construct cemetery maps! I expect them to come hopping along any moment, to try to put me to work again! I won't even let myself think about the Irish flag scarf the human got. I'm sure nothing good can result from that piece of clothing.

Back!

I'm back from my enslavement at the hands of the rabbits, and I can't believe what those bunnies did to my blog! Wasn't it bad enough that they made me color little dots until I got blisters on my paws? Now I come back here, and what do I find, but they have amused themselves sticking up frightening vacation photos! I do hope that no one was traumatized too much by seeing the photos. Really, there ought to be some sort of warning attached to such frightening things like those tomatoes, and I am still surprised that someone didn't arrest Betsy up in Washington. I know she robbed that poor president of something, likely a sandwich!

And This

I don't know why we couldn't get this to post last night, but here's Betsy in Washington.


She's right in front of the White House where the president and that nice wife of his live. You know, she's interested in gardening. We were thinking about hopping by to offer her some advice, since we're such excellent gardeners, but our human really needed our help over at the National Archives with her family tree research. Maybe we can chat with her about planting next time, if the human decides to take the bus back up there. Anyway, Betsy had just stuffed herself decimating a tea back at the hotel, so it was safer than it usually is to take a picture like this.

Bebe Again

While our brother is still working, and he wouldn't still be working if he would actually try to show some industry, instead of stopping to complain about his aching paws every five minutes, we thought we would show you some of our family vacation photos. We hope you enjoy.

Josie Rabbit

This is Josie Rabbit at the tomato festival. Aren't all of those tomatoes beautiful? And they have so many seeds too. We almost filled a little jar when we seeded some of them.

Polar Bears

This is Nanna Polar Bear and a couple of the cubs, attending a quilt show. They just love those things. Don't they look so happy? One of these days, we are sure, they will win the drawing for the sewing machine.

Got Him!

Bebe here. I just wanted to let you know that we captured our brother. Really, if he wants to be undetectable, he ought to do something about that long tail of his. So hard to hide, unlike our fuzzy little cotton tails. Anyway, he's about to start coloring those dots for the nametags, so he won't be back until he's through. Really, we don't know what his problem is. If he would stop kicking up a fuss, and would get to work, he would be done in no time! We even wrote out how many dots we need in each color so he doesn't have to consult the family tree at all. How much easier could the job get?

Not Fooled

Brother, we hope you know that we weren't fooled for a moment by your claim that you were off on a tour of Sioux City, South Dakota. First of all, we raided your savings to pay for that replacement glue. We know you don't have the money for a tour. And second, we can hear your bell. That stolen wool must have fallen out. And isn't that your tail poking out from under the human's bed? Get out from under there this instant! There is coloring to be done, and then you can listen to music with us, to pick the arrangement for the family reunion CDs were are going to burn!

Not Here!

If those rabbits come on here looking for me, I am not here. I have joined a feline tour group, and am on my way to Sioux City, South Dakota. And then we're booked to visit the world's largest ball of twine. So the rabbits really shouldn't wait for me, because I won't be back any time soon. You will not believe the horrors that I have suffered today. First of all, the human strolled by the mission, and was promptly tackled by more homeless bears. I am now up to 672 siblings. And then, to make things even worse, the human dropped by Walmart, and would you believe that that horrible business had a sale going on nametags? The human obtained 144 of them! 144! And I will be expected to produce colored dots for all of them! The bunnies are hopping about now, getting crayons for just this purpose, so if they come on here and ask, I am not at home, and they should start working themselves if they want something done!

My Poor Paws

My, poor, poor paws. I was caught a bit ago by the bunnies, who were determined to accomplish something, and forced onto the map assembly line. I was made to stick the number 5 onto twenty-nine cemetery maps! The only reason they finally let me go, was because they ran out of maps, and were getting a bit concerned about the number of their little stars remaining too. Twenty-nine maps, and of course the bunnies kept insisting I hurry with poking the five onto the maps. I wouldn't be surprised if I don't develop blisters, or possibly irritation on my paws from the glue on those little sticky stars.

Definitely Gloated too Soon

I'm afraid I gloated too soon about the gluestick failure. Sure, the sticks refusing to hold the colored paper to the labels set back the bunnies' plans for seed envelope construction rather nicely, but it didn't occur to me that they would then have time to do a bit of reading, while waiting for the rabbit they dispatched to purchase more glue to come hopping back! Now they've taken it into their fluffy heads that they ought to make a CD of reunion themed music for the goodie bags. Do you know how much my computer time would be cut into, if they did that? Almost 100 CDs! They would be on here forever burning them, and when would I have time for blogging?

Gloating too Soon

You are gloating too soon, brother, I you hope you know. It's Bebe, and you ought to be ashamed of yourself. We know you did something to mess up our gluesticks. But never fear, you will be working yet! We sent a bunny out to purchase industrial strength glue, to get our project back on track! And since you sabotaged the glue we had, we are sure, we dipped into your savings to obtain the stronger glue!

Gluestick Failure

I am happy to announce that the gluesticks the bunnies were using on their little seed envelope seal project have failed. They aren't holding the colored paper on the labels at all in some places, and the rabbits have concerns about how long the hold on the other places might last. They're in the kitchen right now, hopping mad about it. Happy day! No seals mean that the seed envelopes can't be constructed, which means I can't be forced to fold hundreds of the little things! No work for me! And the rabbits have no proof I sabotaged their little gluesticks either!

Well, Well

Well, well, it looks like our brother's been on here. Which means he is likely in the bedroom someplace. We knew we would corner him sooner or later if we staked out the computer, and what better thing to do to pass the time while we were waiting than to work on a little craft project? Kiley Rabbit went with the human to run errands this morning, and she saw the cutest seals, done with little initials, in the wedding section of the craft store. Of course, they didn't have the color we wanted, so we're going to make our own, to go on the seed envelopes. The first batch, that should produce at least 72 seals is in the kitchen letting the glue dry now. We're going to check it out in the morning, and then hopefully get right to work on our envelopes. So, our brother is safe for the moment, but he will be working starting tomorrow. We know he's in here now, and we have rabbits watching the door and both windows. He won't escape this time!

Rabbit Report

I feared for a bit that I wouldn't be able to get on here, to update you on the horrors I am facing. The human went out this morning, and of course a bunny hopped along with her. I was terribly upset, sure another sibling was forthcoming, but what happened was even worse! The human went by a craft store! A craft store just packed with horrible ideas for various favors and such, that are sure to lead to more work for me, if I can't dodge the rabbits. A batch of them have been lounging on the bed all evening, armed with gluesticks, stickers and colored paper, designing little seals to go on the seed envelopes to close them once they dump a scoop of seed inside. They finally hopped off to the kitchen, to use the iron to smooth the glue down, so I was able to get on the computer to alert my readers to the horror. I think I hear hopping! They must be done with their ironing for now! Got to go!

Wonderful News!

Hi, it's Bebe Bunny here to share the wonderful news! We got another roll of paper for the construction of seed favor envelopes, along with another large box of seed! We're going to be able to make well over 300 little seed favors for the reunion! Well, at least we're going to be able to make them as soon as we capture that brother of ours. Really, we don't know what his problem is. Work is good for you. Why look at the work we rabbits do with our garden each year, and all we accomplish! If our brother would just put a fraction of the effort he's spending on avoiding work into actually doing something, who knows how much he could achieve. We'll get him yet, though, never fear. We have a plan.

Today's Genealogy Issues

The human went out this afternoon, to meet with a relative, and she took the computer with her. That is the worst possible sign, that the family tree was going to be discussed. Then when she came home happy, I knew I was right. It appears that this relation is into genealogy as well, and the human is happily anticipating an exchange of genealogy information. That family tree is going to hit monster heights, I just know it. I wonder if I can get those pesky weather people to issue some sort of warning about falling nuts?

Today's Disaster

The human went to the book sale today, and to the archives too, and after this, I just have one question. What in the world have I done to offend the canine population? First the dog neighbors attack that cat and get the bunnies all fired up about getting to testify against them, and now I have learned that a batch of pups attended this horrible book event, and yet they didn't do a thing to stop the human from gathering material that is sure to lead to disaster for me. And there were more dogs by the archives, and they didn't raise a paw to prevent the human from getting those obituaries! Dogs, what did I do wrong, that you seem bound and determined to cause me such trouble?

Dogs Next Door

The dogs next door have done it this time. They assaulted a cat this afternoon. Of course, this was a terrible crime, and they do deserve to be drug away to jail for assault and cattery, but the assault isn't the worst part! When this crime was committed, the bunnies were in the den, keeping an eye out for me, and I suspect catching a garden show on TV while they were looking. The den window just happens to offer a perfect view of the scene of the crime! The rabbits are all witnesses! You should see how they're hopping about, preparing to give their testimony to the authorities! They're already looking at what earbows and outfits will look best when they have to go to court to testify against the dogs! And if they go to court, they human will likely have to accompany them! The courthouse is right down the street from the archives! I sense more genealogy research looming! Blasted dogs! Why couldn't they have behaved? Those rabbits are very industrious! What if they offer to go to the archive after the dogs are tried, to assist the human with her research? Who knows what might be acomplished!

Must Sue the Library

Well, I can't even watch television now. The rabbits are staking out the den trying to catch me. The only way I have avoided them so far was by slithering around on my belly, so my bell doesn't make any noise. I feel like a snake. At least they haven't staked out the computer, though, so I can hop on and alert you to the impending horrors. The library, that horrible place that is the associate of the genealogy archives, is having a book sale this weekend, and the human is determined to go. Do you know what she found at that horrible event last year? Genealogy magazines, that's what! Magazines just devoted to encouraging the growth of that horrible tree of hers! What if she finds more of them, this year, or worse yet, what if she finds genealogy books? The library ought to be ashamed of themselves, and worse yet, this sale is being held right down the street from the archives, so the human is talking about trotting down there as soon as she makes her purchases, to do a little research!

Horrors!

The rabbits are searching the living room for me at the moment, so I thought I would hop on here, and let you know the horror that occurred this morning. If I ever manage to escape the bunnies' pursuit, I swear I have to find an attorney to file suit on my behalf. I'm sure I have such an excellent case against Cousin Ruth, and her rotten twin brother, Cousin Cliff, too, who had the nerve to die, and to allow the human to find their obituaries with a detailed list of survivors! The human has already got in touch with one of Cousin Cliff's relations, one that she is sure will lead to hunting down information on Cousin Lucy and her siblings! She added pages to that book this morning and I don't want to think of the growth this will lead to, with that horrible tree!

We Must Give Him Credit

It's Bebe again. Well, I suppose we must give that brother of ours credit for sneakiness. He snatched a tuft of wool from Shelia Sheep, and stuffed it in his bell to try to keep us from hearing the jingling, and thus being able to hunt him down, to make him be industrious. Really, we have never seen anyone spend so much energy, trying to get out of working. We'll still find him, never fear, though. We can still hear his bell in spite of the stolen wool. It's just making more of a thumping sound instead of its usual jingling. And when we do catch him, we think we'll make him help assemble the maps too, a payback for making us spend all this time hunting him!

Bebe Here

I saw the post our brother made, and I want it known now that we rabbits know perfectly well that he is still in this house somewhere. We checked his family tree. He has no relatives in Toledo or Boise, and besides, we can still hear that bell of his. Really, we don't know what in the world is his problem with helping out on the seed envelope assembly line. It wouldn't kill him to show a bit of industry. Well, we'll find him. Apparently he forgot the big ears that we rabbits have, and their usefulness for hunting down a feline wearing a bell accessory.

I'm Not Here!

If any rabbits come hopping on here, looking for me, I am not here, and have possibly gone to visit relatives in Toledo. Or Boise. Or anywhere, really, but I am definitely not in the area. The bunnies obtained replacement glue sticks today. Would you believe that some foolish store actually sold them two sticks? So, they're all ready to start assembling those seed envelopes, and I know I saw one of them with my leash, to keep me in place in the assembly line! I hear hopping! Got to go and just remember, if the bunnies ask, I'm not here!

Today's Horror Report

The reunion and family tree horrors haven't reared their heads yet today, probably because the human got occupied with a bit of writing. I wonder if I could keep her occupied with that, as a way to save myself from various goodie chores the bunnies are planning to assign me. The only bad thing would be that sooner or later she would likely end up working on the rabbit novels, which will lead to gardening encouragement. Hmmmmm. Gardening encouragement would keep the rabbits outside, though, now wouldn't it? And if they were outside, they certainly couldn't be making me work. Perhaps I need to rethink my position on their garden after all. I'm sure the neighbors can find another place to live.

And Still More Relations

As if the cousins that the human just found and messaged on Facebook aren't bad enough, she just found another relation in the census as well. Really, Cousin Lucy ought to be ashamed of herself, letting herself, and her married name be found so easily. The human is sure that finding this one will lead to finding the rest of this horrible relation's siblings as well, and there are probably ten of those. My only comfort at the moment is that thank goodness, the census taker managed to spell Cousin Lucy's married name a different way on each census, which is making Googling her name much more difficult.

Facebook Issues

The human has done it again. She tracked down another batch of relatives on Facebook and sent a friend request. And this batch is very closely related too. Just my luck. I'm sure that once the human connects with them, a reunion invitation will be issued! And a reunion invitation will result in more goodie bags being needed! And more seed favors needing to be assembled! I will be working forever! Is there some way to block Facebook while there is still time?

Hehehe!

The rabbits started cutting out the squares for the little seed envelope favors this afternoon. They were just about to get out my leash, to make sure I would stay in my assigned place on the assembly line, when one of the bunnies called to the others that the glue sticks were missing. They've hopped all over the house, but the glue is totally gone. Isn't that such a shame? Hehehehehe!!! And they will never prove that I had anything to do with its disappearance, either.

Map Horror

I have some horror involving maps that I ought to report too. The human is planning on passing out a map of the family cemetery locations in the goodie bags, in case they go visiting the graveyards as part of the festivities. She wants to make sure that people won't get lost if they end up separated somehow. Anyway, she has pre-printed maps, and now she's planning to add little numbered stars representing cemeteries to customize the maps. And, of course, the bunnies offered to help. And, of course, like always, they have plans to draft me into this. Josie Rabbit just hopped in, and informed me that I have been assigned the number 5, which means I will be stuck forever between two rabbits, being forced to stick a star with a number on a map, while the bunnies insist I stick faster to keep the line moving!

Yes, the Stuff of Nightmares

Yes, the stuff of nightmares was deeper in the bags from Walmart, and I'm afraid I was just forced to see it, when the bunnies hopped in, and dug it out. They now have another pack of carrot seed in their paws! This is something called the chantenay carrot, only seven inches long, but with a rather alarming looking point. Why aren't there rules out there, governing the purchase of carrot seed, to prevent this sort of thing, such dangerous vegetables falling into the paws of rabbits?

More and More Horrors

The horrors keep coming, and really, there must be some way to hold Walmart accountable for all of this. I don't care if one of the human's relations has large amounts of stock in their business! That doesn't mean that they have to do so much to encourage that horrible reunion! The human dropped by there today, and came back with four large bags full of stuff for the goodie bags. I hate to think of the amount of candy that she obtained, along with two different kinds of stickers and something called nail decals. I'm sure there was more stuff, but I was afraid to poke any further into the bags to see just what. I'm sure that there were further items in there, that are worthy of nightmares!

Nametag Assignment

I was right. My name is down on that list, to work on the assembly line for the nametags. I waited until the rabbits hopped off for a few moments, to check the crayon supplies, and took a look at their little list. I'm down there, as a dotter, which is basically the same thing as a colorer. I'll be expected to apply the dots of color, to identify which branch of the family tree each person who is getting a nametag belongs to! That means I'll actually be expected to consult that genealogy and hunt down each relation before putting the color on the tag! I'll have nightmares for weeks over this!

More Work Planned

Every time I turn around, it seems like some other horror rears its head. I just checked the human's Amazon browsing history, and found that she has been looking at nametag kits, to lag to the reunion. Normally, I wouldn't have worried about this, since hopefully the things would be constructed on the computer, and wouldn't involve work for me, but then I found the bunnies working on another list! Apparently, the human is wanting to do something with the badges, using different colors to identify people from different branches of that horrible tree at the family reunion, which means that assembling the awful things by hand is called for! The bunnies are hard at work, designing a color code, and figuring out who will be doing what on the nametag assembly line. I fear that my name is on that list somewhere as a colorer, or possibly a cord inserter!

Carrot Seed

The rabbits have obtained a rather alarming pack of carrot seed. This seed is for a frightening looking carrot called Tendersweet, ten inches long, with a rather strong looking point at the end, just perfect, in the opinion of the bunnies, for poking me to make me work faster on various tasks related to that reunion or book assembly. Really, Walmart, the store that provided the seed, ought to be ashamed, although I doubt they are, seeing as a relative is involved in that horrible business!

More and More Horror

It's getting worse. Weren't the books bad enough? Apparently they weren't, though, because the human is happily arranging more horror. Now she is wanting to make these cardboard stand-up figures of various ancestors, to lag to the reunion for photo opportunities. She can get a very good deal, if they can do the figures in black and white at Kinkos, which means that she will be able to make multiple ones. The only problem is that Kinkos means that the figures will come with some assembly required, and who do you think will be doing the assembling?

More Horror on the Way

I can't believe this. I thought that the two reunion books that the human obtained from Amazon was the worst of the horror. I thought once those frightening things arrived, it would be over. But oh, no! I was checking her Amazon history, to make sure the human hadn't taken to obtaining goodies for bag stuffing there too, and you won't believe what I found! She's ordered a third reunion book! It's probably already in the mail, and she has high hopes it will be here before the weekend! My weekend is ruint! Does anyone know how I can obtain mailman repellent fast?

Horror is Here

The horror is here, I'm very sorry to say. Both of those family reunion books have arrived, and the human is thrilled with them, which I'm sure is a terrible sign. One of them even has a section on the horrors of the goodie bag, which will surely give her bad ideas, and will lead to a ton of stuffing work for me. Really, what were the authors of these books thinking, writing something so frightening, and then actually selling copies to my human?

Tombstones

My day keeps getting worse, although I'm not sure how that happened, what with the seed horrors I'm already facing. The day has somehow deteriorated, though, because I just heard the human eagerly chattering about tombstones, and obtaining replacement tombstones to honor some of her relations who fought in the Civil War. I can only assume, seeing as these relations are on that nutty family tree of hers, that these people were the ones who amused themselves letting multiple weapons fall into the paws on Betsy's ancestors, back during that war, leading to the Great Honey Theft of 1864. The human seems enthused about this idea of new tombstones, though, and I sense the potential for disaster. If she can get them, she's talking about a ceremony during the family reunion! That will surely lure in multiple, unexpected branches of that horrible tree! And that, in turn, will lead to the need for more goodie bags, and more work for me!

Seed Assemby List

The bunnies left their list for who is to do what on the seed envelope assembly line unguarded, while they were working on their list for the seed that they want to include in the goodie bags, so I checked it out, and just as I feared, they have my name down, to handle folding duties, once a rabbit has cut out the squares, and before a bunny pastes down the edges, and another rabbit dumps in a scoop of seed. They even drew a little picture of me, right by my name, I suppose in case any outside bunnies want to hop by to assist in my torture. What in the world am I going to do? They're talking about getting several more boxes of seed, and goodness knows how many bags, that will result in nightmarish amounts of envelopes that will have to be folded!

March Starting Off Worse

If the way it is starting is an indication, I probably ought to see who I need to talk to, to get March canceled now. The rabbits have obtained two giant boxes of seed for the assembling of seed favors. And even worse, they have obtained a giant roll of craft paper, from which they intend to cut out squares to make the little seed holders! They're going to construct seed containers by hand! And you know that they aren't going to be content to do all of the work themselves, either. They're going to try to draft me into assisting them with this job. My name is probably already on a list somewhere, possibly as a folder, or a paster.

Flood Update

The floodwaters are slowly receding, after the disaster the bunnies caused this afternoon, and so far it looks like our poor neighbors still have a home. Some people down the street are missing a large amount of bamboo that was growing in their yard, though. I can only hope that they continue to believe that the flood got it, and don't figure out that my panda siblings trotted down and snatched it all, while there was a flood going on to blame for its disappearance. Really, my siblings, especially the rabbits, ought to be totally ashamed of themselves!

Rain Dance Has Gone Too Far

If anyone asks, I was on here, chatting with my loyal readers, and certainly had nothing to do with the bunnies' latest rain dance, and the disaster that those rabbits have created this time. They were dancing, and they must have shook their tails a bit too much or something, because a flood is fast threatening our neighbor's house! Or maybe it wasn't an accident. Maybe it was part of some sort of bunny plot. If our neighbor's house was washed away, it would open up tons of gardening space for them in a few weeks! I'll bet anything that's what the little pests are up to! Well, I want it known right now that I was here, and can't be held responsible!

More Amazon Issues

I swear, Amazon is the most evil business that I have ever heard of. Really, they should be so ashamed of themselves. I was checking the human's purchase history there a bit ago, to make sure that no more reunion books had been purchased, when I found something that is almost worse! She just placed an order for a book called How to Wash a CAT!! I'm a cat! Why in the world is she purchasing an instructional manual on how to ruin my nice fur with soap and water? This is terrible! Isn't it bad enough that I am tormented with reunion materials and rabbits? And now there is a close encounter with water looming in my future, I'm sure.

Woe is Me

As if the human's book purchases weren't bad enough, she just got a message from Cousin Louise's granddaughter, like she was sure that she would, over the weekend. Just wonderful. And this relative is going to put her in touch with another relative, I fear one on Cousin Earl's limb of that awful tree. This is terrible. Just terrible. I know the human is going to end up inviting the lot of them to come to the family reunion. I just know it. I will end up having to pack a million goodie bags! My poor paws!

Must Sue Amazon

I must find a way to bring suit against Amazon right away. You will not believe this, but I was checking out their site a bit ago, and when I hit the order history, to make sure the rabbits hadn't snuck in any purchases, I found that Amazon allowed the human to purchase two books on planning FAMILY REUNIONS! TWO BOOKS! Does this business have no shame whatsoever? Do you know the number of horrible ideas that two books on reunion planning are sure to give the human? I must file a suit right away. Goodness knows what they could do next, if they are capable of doing something as foolish as that. Who knows, they will probably try to sell gardening books to the rabbits next.

Today's Relative Update

The human hasn't heard from that granddaughter of Cousin Louise again, although she's sure that she will hear something over the weekend. And what in the world am I going to do, if what she hears over the weekend results in an invitation to attend the family reunion being issued? The rabbits are already looking in catalogs, trying to pick out the best carrots to use to poke me during goodie bag stuffing, and I don't like the look of the points on some of those vegetables!

Sue Arizona

I must find a lawyer right away to sue the state of Arizona. It seems like everyone else is suing them, after all, but I'm sure that all of those humans don't have nearly as good of a case as I do. Would you believe that foolish state has posted death certificates online? And, of course, the human had a relation who managed to die in Arizona, which means she trotted over to the free site right away to download his death certificate and to collect all the information that she could. Really, that state should be ashamed of itself, and if those feline lawyers that I know ever get finished taking the national parks to court, I know I will be due a large settlement!

Worse and Worse

Oh, this just keeps getting worse. The human sent a message to Cousin Louise's granddaughter, and she's already heard back, and sent a reply in response. The rabbits are checking out the human's list of people who need bags right now, and debating if they should go ahead and add these relations or not. I am doomed. Cousin Louise's family will only lead to Cousin Earl's relations, and then possibly to Cousin Frances and Cousin Margaret too. I will be stuffing bags forever!

Oh, NO!!

Oh, no! It's getting worse! As if it isn't bad enough when the human finds dead relative, now she has found a potential living one! It looks as if Cousin Louise is still alive, and worse yet, she has a ton of family photos, which likely means she has other, nightmarish family information! So now, the human is happily amusing herself hunting this relation down. What in the world am I going to do if she finds her? It will surely lead to her being issued a reunion invitation, and thus to more stuffing work for me!

Help! Help! Help!

Oh, someone, HELP!! I just realized something nightmarish! The human is amusing herself looking up cousins on Facebook, and messaging them to request information. Well, I'm sure that the family reunion will be mentioned to them at some point, so what if she decides to invite them? Then, they will obviously need goodie bags, which will mean the human will have to obtain more bag construction materials. And then, I, will in turn be expected to assist with stuffing these bags! Isn't it bad enough that currently almost a hundred bags are planned? Who knows how many more might be necessary if the human decides to drag in some of these new relations? I will be working forever, likely being poked with carrots by the rabbits the entire time, with demands that I stuff bags faster!

Horrible Goodie Update

I ought to sue Walmart. I really should, although, seeing as one of the human's cousins has large amounts of stock in the place, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that they seem to spend every waking hour, and a few hours when decent people should be sleeping, plotting to assist the human in increasing amounts of horror. The human was thrilled to find a giant sale there today, and she came trotting home with alarming amounts of mazes, more kaleidoscopes, and these little heart shaped boxes, suitable for holding candy. Which, of course, indicates more candy might be purchased soon. Betsy Bear is already getting extra snitching sacks, in anticipation of robberies to come, due to the increase in child bait. Will these horrors never end?

AAAAAHHHH!!!

I was so distracted by that bear that came trotting in that I almost missed the true horrors of the evening. I'll bet that's why she was petting me so nicely, too, to try to distract me! I should have known that a bear released from the mission had to be up to something. Oh, this is terrible! Cousin Evelyn is DEAD! And of course, she couldn't die quietly, without fanfare, now could she? She had to leave a nice, detailed obituary, which the human was able to use to hunt down her SURVIVORS on Facebook! As soon as the funeral is over tomorrow, she's going to send out friend requests. Oh, we are all doomed. This is sure to lead to nightmarish growth of that tree, and probably a ton of falling nuts, too. Cousin Evelyn should be ashamed of herself!

Today's Sibling Report

Well, the mission let another one out. I know that place is supposed to help the homeless, but really, do they have to help them by arranging for them to move in here? The human dropped by there this afternoon, after a visit to the doctor, and of course a bear pounced, and begged to move in. I am now up to 669 siblings. My one comfort about this bear is that at least she knows to pet with the grain of my fur, not against it.

Goodies and the Penguins

Sniff, sniff, sniff. I thought today would be marginally safer, with those lazy mailmen taking the day off. I really did. No mail at least meant that the human wouldn't get any horrible reunion materials that way, or at least I thought it meant that. Little did I know that those people in the little brown trucks were still trotting around, and one of them dropped by here with a giant envelope of materials from the local aquarium, with enough brochures and coupons for every bag! This aquarium has just opened a new penguin area! Needless to say, my penguin siblings were thrilled to see the brochures, and now they are lounging by the rabbits, hard at work on party invitations. They figure while the humans are having their parties, they will just invite all of these penguins down for a little pool party. Just perfect. Not only will I have to deal with the human's reunion in a few months, that will undoubtedly encourage nightmarish growth of that tree, but I'll have to put up with the penguins, taking over the pool and partying forever! Do you know how much noise a penguin party creates?

Et Tu, Dogs?

Oh, and speaking of the goodie horrors, I just learned that a DOG was present in the store when the human was gathering these things. A dog was present, and the canine in question didn't do a single thing to prevent the growing goodie horrors! Really, this pup ought to be ashamed of himself. Is this because of those comments I made when I was poked in the doghouse? Because, really, you canines can't hold that against me at all. I'm sure your doghouses are lovely places, and I might like one too, if I wasn't being forced in there, and made to stay there by a batch of delinquent rabbits. There is no need to punish me by assisting with the goodie horrors!

This Afternoon's Goodie Horror Report

I am very sorry to say that the goodie horrors are growing. The human went trotting out today, I suspect in the company of rabbits, and came back lagging numerous large bags. Here's the result: more erasers, tops, pens, rings and soft balls, slinkies, rubber bouncy balls, something called jumpy hearts, stampers, stretchy figures and bug tattoos. And, in an even worse move, she lagged home five large boxes of candy to go in these bags! Candy! Candy is child bait for Betsy Bear! What was the human thinking? Do you know how many children five boxes of candy could lure in for Betsy to torment? Can I be declared an accessory to that bear's crimes, should the rabbits go through with their threats to make me work on packing these bags?

Goodie Horrors Growing

The horrors that are those planned goodie bags are growing, I am very sorry to announce. I suggest you send all small children away from the computer now, before they can see what these horrors contain and become frightened. Either that, or before they can decide they want a bag too, and demand to attend this horrible reunion event. The bunnies have a list of materials for the bag, and the amount of stuff so far is truly terrifying. This is what is going into the bags so far: bubbles, card games, bright gel pens, play dough, cars for boys and rings for girls, frisbees, yo-yos, paddle balls, multiple pencils, kaleidoscopes, several erasers, stencils, tops, balls, mazes, puzzles, crayons and coloring books. Then there are fancy soaps and lip glosses so far for the teens. I don't want to think of what there is for the adults. And I don't like the rabbits' little list either. I know that my name is on there somewhere, probably next to one or more goodie items, that they will be expecting me to pack into the bags come reunion time!

Horror in the Mail

A horror that I almost fear to mention arrived in the mail bright and early this morning. The Department of Rabbitculture (aka The Department of Agriculture) shipped another plant start down to my delinquent bunny siblings. It's something called an evening primrose, and according to the page I found when I researched its dangers, it is a thug like plant. I can only assume that bodes ill for our neighbors and their continuing occupation of their homes, come spring.

Ignore the Last Post

Really, I have got to find bunnyproofing for this computer. Surely some company offers such a service. I can't even take five minutes to check my food dish out without a rabbit hopping on here. Please ignore the last post. Normally, I would whole-heartedly support anything that might keep Betsy tied up, and out of my fur, but I don't think this is going to work out that way. That bear started chuckling evilly when she heard of the suit, and promptly placed an order for more snitching sacks. I'm afraid she has plans to send her attorney to court to represent her, while she raids those poor bears' dens since she can be sure they won't be home. I don't want to imagine how much honey they will loose as a result of this suit.

Visited a Park Lately?

Hi, it's Bebe here again to ask for some help. We bunnies are assisting the firm of Katt, Katt and Katt with a little legal matter. They're representing a group of bears that live up in the mountains, and who have been victimized by our delinquent bear sister, Betsy. Anyway, we promised them that we would ask around and try to find some people who can testify as to the poor management on the part of the rangers. They are sure that such a sloppy job counts as negligence, and failure to protect. Every time we've visited, there have been numerous signs up warning against feeding the poor, hard working bears of the park, but there hasn't been a thing warning against Betsy. Did you know, she's even strolled into their welcome center and done things that were totally unwelcome, and yet the rangers didn't do a thing to stop her? With such poor management, is it any wonder that she's victimized those poor bears as much as she has? Katt, Katt and Katt are sure that they will be able to get a large settlement for these needy bears for loss of honey, hibernation harrassment, and the general pain and suffering of having to deal with Betsy, but they need more witnesses. So, if you've visited a park, and have noticed the lack of appropriate Betsy Bear precautions being taken, contact us today!

Today's Update

Sorry I didn't post yesterday. I was in hiding, in case the authorities came looking for Betsy Bear in connection to those mass thefts of Valentine's Day foods. I guess all of the weddings she raided had insurance, though, and the couples who had hearts stolen were probably looking for a good reason to break up anyway, for it seems that her crimes have gone unreported once again. Now if people would just remove the remains of their stolen food from the backyard so we can all forget about this, it would be much appreciated. I don't like the way the bunnies keep checking out those cake stands and cake tier holders, and commenting on how they would be just perfect to stack plant pots on, so for goodness sakes, if Betsy snitched and ate your wedding cake, get here and collect the remains before they give the bunnies more bad ideas!

Valentine Horrors

Well, I don't have a new sibling yet, although the bunnies keep pointing out to me that the night is still young, and Amazon is happy to provide new family members. I can only hope they do not decide to take in an elephant from there. After the horrors I have experienced today, that is the last thing that I need. Betsy was out in full force today, celebrating the day of love by looting. I do hope no one wanted to experience romance with food on this happy occasion, for if you did, you are doomed to a massive disappointment. Betsy took to the air in that purloined sled, and I'm not entirely sure what she did, and I'm not sure it's safe to know, but there are now feathers in the swimming pool, and that delinquent bear has a bow and arrows in her possession. I can only assume that she attacked Cupid for all of his heart shaped boxes of chocolate. Should your sweetheart have made the claim that one of those was purchased for you, and then went missing, please see the rabbits tomorrow to remove the remains from the backyard. Oh, and should you have been trying to get married today, well, really you ought to have known better, shouldn't you? Everyone knows that the wedding chapels do a brisk business today, and Betsy has made careful note of all of them. You can collect your cake toppers in the morning. Please line up to the left of the people collecting the remains of the boxes of chocolate.

Still in the Doghouse

I'm still in the doghouse, I'm afraid, over that minor human injury thing. The only reason I was able to get on was that those bunnies got distracted, looking at stuff, and making notes for things to poke in those horrible goodie bags. Really, how long are they going to demand that I'm punished, anyway? Isn't what is likely going to happen tomorrow bad enough? The human is having more issues with her glases, and will likely need to visit the store again. Every time she goes to that horrible business, I end up with more siblings! Who knows what horrible increases in family size might await me tomorrow.

Bebe Bunny Reporting

What was our brother doing on here? Really, he ought to be ashamed of himself. He is in the doghouse, and is not allowed online. If anyone sees him posting on here, could you email us right away to let us know? He's been a seriously bad kitty, first maiming a human like he did, and then with the poor excuse for a salad he produced to try to distract us. He didn't bother to provide dressing, and we know that he munched down all of the cheese toppings before he handed it over.

In the Doghouse

I'm afraid I'm in the doghouse, and might I say, I really don't know how any canines reading this stand the place? So cramped, and I'm sure there are fleas lurking about. The humans insisted, though, after a minor incident. Really, they're making way to much of a big deal over it. How was I to know that a human could possibly bleed that much if a claw grazed them in the wrong location? Really, it wasn't my fault at all, but the humans are kicking up a terrible fuss over the situation, so in the doghouse is where I am, and those rabbits are keeping an eye on me to make sure I stay there. I had to distract them with a salad so I could get on.

Sibling Report

Well, the mission let another animal escape. The human dropped by there as I feared she would, after getting her glasses fixed, and of course an animal pounced on her the second she stepped in the door, demanding to be allowed to move in. At least this one was a bear, not a bunny. That is the only slightly positive thing I can see in the situation at the moment. I now have 668 siblings.

ACK!!

I can't believe this. I turned my back for a second, and what happens but that rabbit hops on and messes up my blog with a post about those horrible seed labels. I really have got to find some sort of bunnyproofing to prevent this sort of thing from happening. Please dis-reguard that rabbit's post. The bunnies don't need anyone posting suggestions that will only encourage them.

Seed Labels

Hey, it's Bebe Bunny here again. Our brother's busy moaning about the human going to the glass store in the morning, and the potential for such a trip to result in more siblings. Really, he ought to be a bit less selfish. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her helping out the homeless like she does. Anyway, while he's fussing, I thought I would pop on and let you know that we've designed our little seed labels. Now all that's left to do is to print them out, but that's where we've run into a problem. We aren't sure what color of paper to use. We were wanting to use orange, but then it occurred to us that it might be harder to get that color of paper, so now we're stuck. If anyone has any suggestions for an appropriate paper color for our cute little seed labels, please click the comment button and let us know. Thanks!

Have Pity

I can only hope that someone will have pity on me, in the face of the disaster that might be coming my way tomorrow. The human is having issues with her glasses, and thinks she needs to go back to the glass store. And, as I posted on Monday, thanks to the wait she had the last time that she was there, I ended up with six new siblings! What if this visit results in more? What if it results in the arrival of more rabbits? Our neighbors are not insured for more rabbits!

Lousy Cousin

Does anyone have any suggestions for the best way to find an attorney to bring a suit against a cousin? All of the feline ones that I know are occupied at the moment, filing suits on the behalf of various bears against the park service for failure to protect them from Betsy Bear. If you have visited a national park, be prepared to be called to court soon. Anyway, I'm sure I have an excellent case against Cousin Stella, who had the nerve to die a few days ago, and then had the nerve to have a detailed obituary, with a list of numerous survivors, published in the local newspaper! Needless to say, the human was very pleased to see this, and is, I fear, making notes from the obituary to add alarming amounts of limbs to that tree of hers. Really, Cousin Stella should be ashamed, and I am sure that I am due a large settlement, due to the trauma she has caused by encouraging tree growth!

Bunnyproofing

Does anyone know how I can install bunnyproofing on the computer? The rabbits found a really good deal on little seed envelopes for the human's reunion goodie bags, and now they are bugging me to get off, so they can go online and work out labels for the seed. Naturally, I want to put a stop to this before they can get started. Labeling seed can only lead to them obtaining more seed, after all. So, how can I control them? I'm afraid passwords don't work. There are so many rabbits hopping around all the time that at least one will likely see me entering it.

Siblings

The humans didn't go to the country today, which means the cows have at least a few more days before they are in terrible trouble with their farmer. My human had broke her glasses, and had to trot down to the glass store this morning to get them replaced. That wasn't the major problem, though. The problem was that there was a considerable wait, and you won't believe what the human did. She dropped by the local mission, and was promptly pounced on by a batch of homeless animals, who begged to come home with her. I am very sorry to say that I now have 667 siblings, including a new bunny sibling. And frankly, I am very alarmed about that rabbit. It is dressed in a little boxing outfit, including gloves. The rabbits are dangerous enough when armed with carrots. What am I going to do if there is a professional fighter bunny in the house? Really, the mission ought to be ashamed of themselves, letting so many animals escape!

The Country and the Cows

The humans took a little trip to the country today, to check on the country cottage, and of course, Betsy Bear trotted along to torment those poor bears who have the misfortune to have their den near the lake. I just hope they thought to invest heavily in honey insurance before they settled down to snooze back in the fall. Betsy's crimes aren't the worst result of this visit, though. While she was up there, looting and pillaging, she happened to spot several herds of cows, and noted all of the manure in their pastures. And, of course, once she got home, she shared this news with the rabbits in exchange for a suitable honey bribe. The bunnies were absolutely thrilled, and now they are hopping everywhere, gathering rakes, shovels and sacks, and making plans to ride along with the humans when they go back tomorrow to check out a possibly damaged shingle, so that they can offer to clean up the cows' dwelling for them. They're sure the cows will be thrilled to let them help out, and the manure will be wonderful for their garden. Really, those rabbits ought to be ashamed. What are the cows going to do, when their farmer comes along, looking to collect that manure to sell, and it is all gone? How in the world will they ever explain that they were bad cows, and handed it over to a batch of bunnies? The cows will be in a ton of trouble, and it will all be those rabbits' fault!

Goodie Gathering

I'm very sorry to announce that the human's work on those horrible goodie bags is proceeding well. She came home today toting giant amounts of brochures and coupons to be poked in there, and she has plans to look for more in the next day or so. That many coupons and discounts are sure to attract plenty of relations to that horrible reunion, and even worse, it will keep them hanging around longer, which will only give them more time to contribute to the growth of that horrible family tree. Does anyone have any suggestions as to what I can do to prevent this? There is way too much paper to eat.g

Year of the Sheep Too

During my research on the horror that is the Year of the Rabbit, you won't believe what I found out. There is a year devoted to sheep, too. Those poor, poor sheep. Normally, you would think having a year devoted to you would be a great thing, but I know my polar bear sisters all too well, The second those poor sheep get together to try to celebrate their year, the polar bears will tackle them with scissors for sheering. They will spend the entire year as nudists! Poor sheep. Does anyone know the best way for them to let the Chinese know that they appreciate the thought, but they need to trade this year for something else, possibly sweaters, if the polar bears have their way?

Year of the Rabbit Has Begun

Well, the Year of the Rabbit just started, and what a horrible start it is of to, too. There were a bunch of rabbits hopping around the backyard all day today, celebrating and helping my bunny siblings poke out stakes to mark where they want to install the garden as soon as they're able to start digging again, probably after that storm the groundhogs arranged passes over the weekend. At the current rate the bunnies are staking things, the only space that won't be part of their garden soon is the concrete around the swimming pool and they're thinking of making large planters out of kiddie swimming pools to take up some of that space. The Year of the Rabbit is off to a nightmarish start!

Groundhog's Day Storm

The groundhogs would like me to see if all of you are enjoying the nice storm they arranged in honor of Groundhog's Day, today. I told them that it was probably a bit much, but for some reason the little fluffy things were sure that you would all just love a few feet of snow, to trap you in your homes so you will have plenty of time to consider the wonder that is the groundhog. Really, what loon came up with the idea of giving the groundhogs their own holiday, anyway? Was it the same person who thought up that Year of the Rabbit thing?