Short Report

We attended that Civil War thing today, and we do hope the kitty shrieks didn't ruin anyone's Sunday or disrupt Sunday sermon.  The human sold a genealogy book and has hopes of selling more soon, and Brother did not take it well.  And Betsy Bear learned that the humans have for some foolish reason placed their cannons on wheels.  We're not sure why they wold do something so dangerous.  Cannons on wheels.  It's practically an invitation for Betsy to walk off with a cannon.  We think you can guess what happened.

Today's Shrieking Update

Due to rain, we are going to that Civil War thing tomorrow.  Unfortunately, the delay didn't effect the level of shouting, due to our finding out the whereabouts and married name of Cousin Blanche and all of her relations.  Brother didn't take that well at all.  Sorry about that, but we did warn you to protect your ears, we would like to point out.

Weekend Warning

We thought we better warn you to protect your ears now.  We're planning to hop to a Civil War reenactment this weekend where the human will have the opportunity to gather genealogical information and to hopefully sell a few things too.  Brother is not happy, so ear protection is definitely a good idea.  Also, any bears in the area should probably hide your honey supplies.  Betsy will be going along on this trip and we fear there might be unguarded cannons she can get her paws on.  Never a good thing.

Tombstones

My day keeps getting worse, although I'm not sure how that happened, what with the seed horrors I'm already facing. The day has somehow deteriorated, though, because I just heard the human eagerly chattering about tombstones, and obtaining replacement tombstones to honor some of her relations who fought in the Civil War. I can only assume, seeing as these relations are on that nutty family tree of hers, that these people were the ones who amused themselves letting multiple weapons fall into the paws on Betsy's ancestors, back during that war, leading to the Great Honey Theft of 1864. The human seems enthused about this idea of new tombstones, though, and I sense the potential for disaster. If she can get them, she's talking about a ceremony during the family reunion! That will surely lure in multiple, unexpected branches of that horrible tree! And that, in turn, will lead to the need for more goodie bags, and more work for me!

Human's Plans Failed

The human's plan to attend that reenactment to talk about the horrible family tree, and to sell her books has completely fallen apart, leaving me with a sobbing human, and danger of fur damage due to tears. And, to make matters worse, I actually saw her coil a couple of books, just to see how it would work, and apparently what the rabbits said coil insertion was is completely different than the actual job, because what the human did looked like fun, and something I'm sure that I could do so much better than her. Only now she's so upset, she isn't wanting to try to put together anymore books, not ones related to that awful tree and not ones for the church! Now what am I going to do? 200 coils, and unless the human produces books, I won't get to get my paws on a single one!

Call the Police!

Call the police right away! As if it wasn't bad enough, that the human attended four days at that genealogical horror session, learning to grow her horrible tree, she just checked her voice mail, and her request to speak at sign her book of Civil War letters at the battle held down at one of those horrible ancestors homes has been approved! This means that she will need books put together, which means someone is going to have to assist in this assembling! The bunnies are hopping around, all excited, with their assembly sign-up list, and I have a sneaking suspicion my name is on there as a coil inserter. What in the world am I going to do? As soon as the supplies arrive, she plans to get right to work, binding books!

Disaster in the Making

A disaster is fast approaching, is all that I can say. The human just emailed the place where one of her ancestors lived, and where they have a Civil War battle each year, to see about setting up to sign the book of letters she assembled from one of her relations that was in the war, and who fought nearby. She has also offered to talk about the family. What if they agree to this? The human is sure she could do a good talk, with her research to guide her, which would lure lots of people in, and bring in lots of money for the society! I think I'll be screening her email for a few days, to delete any acceptances she might get. Such horrible encouragement can only result in more growth to that nightmarish family tree!

Groundhog Issues

The groundhogs just gave me some horrible news. It seems a large group of groundhogs live down where that Civil War thing took place last weekend, and so my groundhog siblings had the penguin chick drop off a few party invitations for them to be passed out while the human was poking at that awful tree. And in even worse news, these groundhogs live on a train line, so they can just hop a locomotive up here! One of them was spotted a few blocks away a couple of hours ago, and I'm sure he's a bad sign of further groundhogs to come.

It Rained

It rained yesterday. I swear, I ought to file suit against that weatherman who just mentioned isolated showers, not downpours and flooding! The rain kept the human confined to the historical society and lead to more growth on that horrible tree than I want to think about. Also, all of that rain drastically reduced the amount of cannon security available, not that those people ever really bother with proper security measures anyway. I'm just glad that I have an alibi. I even made sure to pop into the window so the mailman could see me and vouch for my being here during the time when that cannon was snitched.

Battle Today

The humans took off to that horrible battle a bit ago. I hope all of the poor, misfortunate people who happen to make their home in Georgia had enough time to flee. Betsy seems very sure of capturing that cannon, and I don't want to think of what the rabbits are up to down there. Six of them hopped along and I didn't like the size of the sacks they amused themselves carrying. As for me, I managed to convince the humans to let me stay at home so at least I won't be charged as an accessory to cannon theft or whatever antics the bunnies are plotting.

Tomorrow's Planned Disaster

I urge anyone who lives in the state of Georgia to flee for their lives tomorrow because I suspect Betsy Bear will have custody of a cannon by mid-day tomorrow. I'm afraid she's studied the battlefield arrangements extensively, and I shudder to think what this education will do for her when it comes to cannon capture capability. The rabbits are making plans to go to this event as well, and I don't even want to think about why. There's a seed bank somewhere down there and I suspect their aim is capture it, though. I hope that poor, poor state is insured.

Escape Foiled

I tried to make a run for it this afternoon to avoid being captured and drug to that Civil War thing tomorrow. The human was rolling out the door, and had paused to check the mail. I almost made it, but she snagged me and yelled for help so I could be drug back inside. Can I punish her for that? I was going to go down and hide out at my cat mother's house. I'm sure the bunnies and Betsy Bear wouldn't have thought to check there for me. As it is, they're keeping a careful watch to make sure I can't try fleeing again. I shudder to think of what tomorrow will be like.

Penguin Disaster Planned

I was just checking those maps Betsy Bear was looking at, and I realized that this weekend is going to be a bigger disaster than I imagined. This Civil War place is suspiciously close to the place where some of the penguins' relatives are living and to make matters worse, I think the human's planning to go right by their home while doing research on that awful relative of hers whose letters she's planning to publish. The penguins have been waddling around with paper, pens and stickers, and I have a horrible feeling they're using them to construct invitations to a pool party to be distributed to all of their relations! Does anyone know if the aquarium can hold me in any way accountable for this upcoming penguin escape? Goodness knows those places just love blaming cats for every other crime that might happen around there. They loose one little fish and automatically they find the nearest feline to accuse of eating it. I don't want to think of the accusations that will be flying when their penguins escape for a party.

Civil War

How bad a sign do you suppose it is that I caught Betsy Bear reading a book all about the Civil War, and more specifically about the battle the human is hoping to attend this weekend? I don't like the way she keeps checking out the maps of the actual arrangement of the battlefield either. Really, what was the author of the book thinking by putting those things in there? I'm sure Betsy is planning to capture a cannon, and those maps will just make it easier to work out her escape route with the cannon of her choice. Those things are never properly guarded.

This Weekend's Upcoming Doom

The human is still hard at work making plans to attend that Civil War reenactment, and I'm getting more concerned by the moment! I just know I'm going to be caught and drug along to that horrible event. She's got a book she's close to having published of some of her uncle's letters from that war and place, that's she's hoping to find potential buyers for, so she's claiming the trip should count as a business venture. A business venture sounds like a lot of work to this little kitty, and I just don't like the idea of being anywhere where there are cannons and Betsy Bear in the same zip code! Isn't it bad enough all of the trouble she caused at the tomato festival with those cannons?

Book Issues

I am doomed, is all that I can say, and I totally hold the human responsible for this. Those teddies are getting much too excited about the notion of being in books, and are now claiming that I must spend all of my time with them for research purposes. They're planning to attend a Civil War reenactment in a couple of weeks, and now they're saying I must go with them! Help! I know all too well the dangers of such an event with unguarded cannons and Betsy Bear on the loose. If I'm drug along, I will end up caught by the authorities for sure as an accessory to her crimes. How do I get out of this? The other teddies are already looking at how to best pack my cat bed!

Genealogy Book

The human is working on another genealogy book, a transcript of some uncle's letters from the Civil War. She expects to be through with it fairly soon too, which is rather worrisome for me, because there has been some mention of selling this thing, and I fear I could be drafted into providing assistance. Really, selling anything connected to that Civil War thing will result in way too much alarming closeness to such things as cannons, highly dangerous as long as Betsy Bear is roaming loose. I don't want to be anywhere near cannons and that bear! Does anyone have any ideas on how I can avoid selling duty and cannon exposure?

Tomato Festival

Those insane humans up in the country are having a festival in honor of the tomato. Obviously the incidents last year have slipped their minds is all that I can say about that. Betsy was very pleased to see the info on it, and I'm shuddering to think of what will happen when she gets to the Civil War reenactment. Those people do such a poor job of guarding their cannons and other firearms it isn't funny. I can only assume that the people who took part in the actual Civil War did much better, or else there wouldn't have been a whole lot of warring due to weaponry being made off with by Betsy's ancestors. Those poor lake bears. Obviously the people in charge of the Civil War stuff are kin folk to our neighbors who never guard their boat. Betsy's anticipating equipping it like a proper pirate vessel now. Those poor lake bears, and pretty much anyone in the vicinity is doomed.