Monday isn't Looking Good

Monday isn't looking better than the weekend. Really, what did I do so wrong to deserve all of this torment? The human is thinking about trying to go somewhere on Monday, to finish the edits on that horrible bunny book, and to possibly work on the next book in the series as well. I wonder if I could hide her power cord? Finished edits will just lead to publication, and publication will just lead to the country and the food co-op for me. And to farmers' markets! I can't forget those horrible gatherings. Farmers' markets are discussed several times in those awful novels, so the human feels they would be lovely places to sell books. All of the vegetable exposure, though! And you know those bunnies are going to want to drag me along. They're even thinking about making me a special bunny-themed collar, so I will fit in better at these events!

Voting

The humans went to do some sort of early voting thing today. I thought it was okay, but my suspicions were aroused when they returned with a vegetable odor around them. It turns out that this polling place is at the FARMERS' MARKET! Needless to say, I was very alarmed, and then the rabbits hopped in and made it all worse, with the happy news that of course they had known all about this, since all bunnies are registered voters! They even showed me their little cards, giving them permission to vote! Have you ever heard of something so foolish in your life? Really, they're bunnies, easily distractable creatures. If someone dangled a carrot in front of their noses, or a packet of seed, all rational thought would fly out of their heads. And they are being allowed to vote while felines are disenfranchised? Really, who thought this up? Cats would be sensible, responsible voters, unlike certain cotton-tailed troublemakers!

Bad, Bad Dogs

Oh, Dogs, you should be ashamed of yourself. You should hang your heads, droop your ears and fly your tails at half-mast. Really, how could you be this rotten? The human went uptown again today, and once more there were a ton of dogs, trotting around that horrible farmer's market, not doing a thing to prevent vegetable purchases. I wouldn't be surprised if some of the canines weren't even encouraging them by offering to help rabbits with their purchases, and toting baskets to vehicles. And dogs, as if that horrible behavior wasn't enough, there was a genealogy fest up there today, and did you raise a paw to prevent this horrible event? Oh, NO! You trotted around it, not causing a bit of trouble. I'm sure some of you even poked your noses into booths, looking for information on your family tree. You ought to be ashamed. The human has already added a new limb to that tree, and probably sold who knows how many books, thanks to that thing. And, as if that wasn't bad enough, you organized some sort of historical costume contest for visitors of the four legged variety! Only the fact that the bunnies couldn't find an appropriate outfit, due to Betsy refusing to share her bear sized weapons kept me from being forced to take part! You should be ashamed of yourselves!

Dogs!

Dogs, what in the world are you thinking? The bunnies hopped to that farmers market with the human today, and they reported spotting canines everywhere. Businesses even had drinking fountains put out for them! Drinking fountains! What is next, all you can eat canine snack bars? And those dogs weren't doing a thing to discourage the vegetable fest either. They were probably encouraging it. Really, dogs, what were you thinking? All of those vegetables, and rabbits hopping around, probably getting their paws on nightmarish amounts of snacks and seeds, without your doing a thing to stop them! What were you thinking? And now, since the bunnies have seen how nice things are, and how happy all of the canines seem to be with the arrangements at the farmers market, they are sure that a feline will be just as happy, and are making arrangements to lag me along on their next visit! I hold every dog responsible for my pending vegetable exposure!

Must Hide Saturday

I have to find a good hiding place. I have two full days. I can only hope that will be enough. I spotted a bunny a bit ago, with paper and pen, taking notes for their weekend plans. Not only are they hoping to visit that farmer's market, but they are making plans for visiting the country cottage as well. I even heard them discussing hopping by another farmer's market on the way, should they get to go up there. And they have an entire list, once more filled with work that they are going to try to draft me into assisting with. I know that I saw a couple of them getting my leash. What in the world am I going to do? And if they capture me, what if they force me to attend the farmer's market with them before dragging me off to work. They have been commenting about how they see dogs attending these events all the time, so they are sure felines are welcome as well. All of that vegetable exposure! Does anyone know if being exposed to massive amounts of vegetables can lead to the development of vegetarian tendencies, even if you don't eat them?

Frightening Saturday Plans

I just heard something very alarming, very alarming indeed. The human is talking about going up to the farmer's market this weekend, to do a bit of looking around. And you know, if she goes there, those rabbits will hop along with her, to get snacks, and probably alarming amounts of seed, too. Really, I would almost prefer that the human go back to that waterpark place to renew her lobster coloration to going to a farmer's marker. I can just imagine the trouble that place will cause now, and probably afterwards the bunnies will want to hop off to the country too, just to plan some work for me, to make the horrors of the weekend complete!

More Seed Purchases

I'm very sorry to announce that the bunnies obtained packs of cantaloupe, cucumber and Hungarian hot wax peppers today. They plan to hop out in the morning to plant the horrible things. Oh, and the farmer's market is open too, right near the horrible genealogy archives. Of course, the rabbits were thrilled to hear this, and are encouraging the human to visit right away. I can only hope her leg will prevent her from trotting up there tomorrow.

Archives

The rabbits emailed me a bit ago, to let me know they're ready to start terrorizing people with promotions for those rabbit books tomorrow. There's even a farmer's market just a short ride away, to provide the bunnies with more encouragement. Honestly, I have never been so glad to be in jail in my life. Who knows what will happen once the rabbits get going? They say they have already approached one author, and they are sure to chat up more first thing in the morning! What if they get someone before they've had their morning coffee, and the person agrees to buy the books?

Farmer's Market Again

The human is making some noises about trying to go to that horrible farmers' market again. She claims it's to find witnesses to her accident, but I know it's really to help out those rabbits. She can't fool me. Honestly, what is that human thinking? The bunnies will get heaven only knows how many veggies and seeds if she goes up there, and I don't even want to think of the disaster that will result from next year's garden if they get more seeds. Our poor, poor neighbors. I'm not sure a year's warning will be enough to save them.

I Blame the Rabbits

Speaking of the human's fall, I totally blame the rabbits. One of the baby bunnies was traveling with the human, hiding in her research sack. Needless to say, that little thing is now complaining and saying her ears got shaken excessively during the tumble. Honestly, though, as a rabbit stowaway, she should have hopped clear when the human started towards the ground, and should have done something to have caught the human before she could be injured! This is probably the only time I'll say this about the rabbits, but I wish one of the big ones would have stowed away to the farmer's market. I'm sure they would have been big enough to cushion the human properly and to have prevented major injury. Still, that little bunny should have at least tried!

Farmer's Market

They're having that farmers' market near the archives again tomorrow. The human has already mentioned needing to pop up there to do some research, and I just know at least one of the rabbits will try to stow away. Does anyone know the best knots for restraining bunnies? The human will surely fail to supervise them if she's working on that terrible tree of hers, and I shudder to think of what they might do if they got loose at the farmers' market. They've mentioned getting more of those horrible zebra tomatoes for seeding purposes!

Green Zebra Tomato

The rabbits have obtained something called a Green Zebra tomato. There was a farmer's market today up near the archive where the human goes to grow that awful tree, and would you believe she had the nerve to bring one of those tomatoes back for the bunnies? My one comfort is that it's small, and perhaps doesn't have too many seeds in it. I just know it will attract zebras, though, exactly what we don't need. The zoo is never going to forgive us for all of the havoc my siblings are causing.